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 Aug 2018 Ana Sophia
Speak Slowly
sleepless nights, man these emotions ain't making me feel right.
one day I could be feeling my best, but the next minute I could be a mess.
Feeling ecstatic one minute and then fall into another rut the next, the cycle is infinite.
When was the last memory of a sweet dream? These few days I've awakened only to be covered in sweat.
Vivid dreams that torture me in my sleep and life that stresses me in my wake. My morale and soul feel weak, just how much more can I take?
I just need a break, time to myself and more time to write.
Maybe take a trip, run my fingers over every spine on a bookshelf and remind myself that I'll be alright.
Day 23
 Aug 2018 Ana Sophia
You never saw the look in her eye
when she said goodbye

Crystal tears and a blooded face
there was never such sadness in one place

Do not wipe your weeping tears
Cry still beyond for many years

For those not missed can not say
I will be remembered another day
Do not worry, you've been loved.
 Aug 2018 Ana Sophia
 Aug 2018 Ana Sophia
im sorry i couldn't love you the way you loved me.
im sorry i held your heart hostage for six months before smashing it into a million tiny pieces.
im sorry i couldn't bring myself to feel what you felt for me.
i tried, i really tried. with everything in my being. i wanted you to be the one. but now i feel like im meant for no one.
sometimes i cry. sometimes i feel as if what i did was a mistake. sometimes i want to come back and make you happy again, even if it means setting myself on fire to keep you warm.
im sorry for everything i put you through.
maybe im not a hopeless romantic after all.
i hope you find someone
 Aug 2018 Ana Sophia
She Writes
You asked me why I like you
But I didn’t want to tell
Some of my reasons are cheesy...
But here is why I fell

I love the way your lips curve
When I make you smile
It makes me want to pull you close
And kiss you for awhile

I love the way your eyes twinkle
When you talk about things you love
I truely believe
You are a gift from above

I love that you are compassionate
You have such a big heart
That was the first thing I noticed
Right from the start

I love the way it feels
When you hold me tight
I finally feel safe
Like I could sleep through the night

I love that you don’t judge me
For my less than perfect self
That is more attractive
Than any amount of wealth

There are so many more reasons
But I’ll start with just this few
Maybe someday
I’ll give this poem to you

 Aug 2018 Ana Sophia
You have a heart
Even if
It has scars
Feels weak.

Even though it doesn't beat
Or stops for anyone.

Doesn't mean you don't have a heart.
You are still sane

You do love.
You do care.

You just love too much
That it ends up
Killing you from
The inside
And out.

You love until
You feel like you can't anymore.

And in time
Someone will do the same thing to you.
It probably already happened.

Someone's heart has beaten
And stopped for you.
You are loved
Cared for.

Even if you don't know it.

You are loved.

Even when you can't love yourself.
if my heart is an ocean
then my waves are stuck on you
with your words as thick as seaweed
that keep surfacing as i pursue

and as my tide gets high
i feel you find a place to hide
in the depths of all i’ve grown
you are swept away to find a home

but as my tide falls low
your truth comes out from down below
exposing heaviness you left in me
where i find sight to clearly see

that letting go of what could be
is how i finally set me free
heart is heavy
mind is on you
i miss you boy
i feel so alone
and you always felt like home
i hate missing someone that probably doesn't miss me at all
But the many words
I want to say to you
will hide within the
recesses of my mouth
like the fiery sun kneels
beneath the vast horizon.

But maybe in the pale light
of the midnight moon,
my words will be whispered
gently as you sleep,
and you will dream of me
and the words I wish to say.
vemod | Swedish | (n.) a tender sadness or pensive melancholy; the calm feeling that something emotionally significant is over and never will be back
 Aug 2018 Ana Sophia
 Aug 2018 Ana Sophia
With hidden hands,
the curtain clung to the wall
and cascaded like a waterfall
down to the floor.

Smothering the window
and draping an old side table,
rendering it derelict
- a lifeless silhouette.

Quarter way down from the ceiling,
the curtain parted just a sliver.
Allowing a lone ray to visit between
ambling clouds.


One on the outside can’t fully see
the darkened workings
of a confined mind.

I, on the inside...
Can’t see past the cloth
fastened stubborn
over my weary eyes.
 Aug 2018 Ana Sophia
I'd be lying if I said
This isn't hurting me
I'm a sucker for telling you
This is hurting me

I can't tell the difference anymore
I'm having a problem
Is that my solution
Or is this my problem

Numbing the pain
Doesn't make it ok
I'm gonna get you back
And still won't be ok

Trying to keep my wrist closed
So I don't **** me
And you're unphased by my pain
And that's what kills me
First thing I wrote after I got my heartbroken
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