i thought
so much
about it all
this and that
too many of this
too little of that
too many thoughts
and so little eyes
to see it all
unravel.
i need-
i want-
others to see
my random words
of nonsense..
to feel noticed
for my mind.
i think
i'm ready
to leave
my old thoughts here..
to create something better
somewhere else but here.

i came close
to you..
almost
made you laugh
i even hoped
to make your day
but
isn't it great
oh shouldn't it
be great
that you already found
the one
your only one
who can light up
your days..
maybe even
make you
laugh
harder than i-
i could never..

I almost came
close
to knowing
you.

I always wonder
If I'm just
On my own
Thoughts
Without any
One
To know me
But
Do they care
Like I care?
I always wonder.

careful now..shh
the sound
it's returning..
why? i-
i don't know
they seem okay
though.. i-
i'm not quite sure
if i should be-
be afraid
or surrender my-
my thoughts
my fears
my doubts
then what will i be?
what will it be?

careful now..shh
the sound is growling
feed it something
Quick. Fast. Now.
give in please.

silence,
it's my worst
enemy..
it can ****
someone..
if it isn't
too careful
feeding each
thought
that comes
to mind
toxic waste
flowing within me
giving each
****** new thought
a deeper meaning
and another reason
to worry
and worry
until you,
yourself
don't know why
you were stressing out
to begin with..
and there goes
another sleepless night..

you make
me feel
at ease..
just your voice
alone
gets me
through
the night..
oh please
just whisper
to me..
tell me all
that you have
to offer
and i promise
that i won't
daze off
cuz i know
how hard
it could be
to finally
open up to
somebody
and let
your guard
down
just for a second
anything
could happen
and maybe
this time
it will be
worth it..
to finally
just be
at ease..

the words
i put out
can't be said
out loud
but
would they even
make sense
to you..
would they?
if i were
to write
something
about you..
would you
even know
that the words
mean more than
just meaningless
sentences on a page..
would you even try
to figure it all out..
or would you say
nice things
just to say them
cause you wouldn't
actually understand
these words
that i put out
for you..

would you?