crying won’t help
i repeat this mantra
in my head
every time a tear
murky with sadness
as dense as the world is round
with anguish
falls to the ground and
splash
dies
one after the other
letters streak down my face
letters to me
letters to you
letters saying i hate you
i’m sorry
i miss you
as they hit the earth
they lose their lives
like bumblebees who’ve stung in vain
and steal my messages away
with them
so no one will know that
my fortress crumbles
and i am not strong enough
to rebuild the walls
my tears
are selfish
my tears
are bad at their jobs
they never deliver my letters
the ones that say
i hate you
i’m sorry
i miss you
so i say it again
crying
won’t
help