If in order to exist, it must be written
then at dawn when I wake, I'll reach for my pen.

I'll write of light, sunrises, love, and beauty.
My pages will overflow with all things good.
I'll write of adventure & kindness, of laughter & healing.
My steps will scream confidence, though I've stumbled each time I stood.

If in order to exist, it must be written
then I will never ceases writing, until I reach the end.

The sun will rise each morning
In this I have no doubt
My fear is not that the dawn won't come, only that when it does, I won't be watching & that's a miracle I can't afford to be left without.

This fear is what drives me each morning
To move, to smile, to ask:
If my feet don't hit the floor and start running towards that miracle, do I even deserve the sunrise, or should I just turn my back?

The darkness begs to linger each morning
I used to think it demanded
But that makes it sound like I don't have the power, that the emotions run my show and I can't decide to end their dances.

And that's not true, I'm reminded each morning
I have the ability to choose
So now when I wake up feeling heavy I'm not as distraught as before since the belief that I am weak is my old story and I won't let it define me - I refuse.