If you know why
salmon swim upstream
in a suicidal attempt to
get back to their beginnings
and why lemmings head
en masse for the sea
and why drones who
service the queen bee
inevitably die,
then tell me why
I who should follow
their lead hold back?
Am I afraid to find
that the pain of leaving
might be less than the
pain of staying behind?
Is this what salmon, lemmings
and drones all know?
And so they willingly go?

its alright if I am secondary to whoever comes before me.
its alright if you don't love me anymore.
Because I must, I must have a sine that sais 'use me'
And it must be my fault that you left.

Im sorry that I had a few morals, and I didn't want to have ***
Im sorry that I wanted to Waite till I was in my wedding bed.
And im sorry I made you do it, because my **** was my fault.
At least that's what you said.

Its not even a ****, I didn't **** you.
You never said no, you never told me to stop did you?
No I suppose your rite, I didn't tell you to stop.
You couldn't hear me after you covered my mouth.
And you couldn't see my face while tears rolled down.
And you didn't realize that the sounds coming from beneath your hands were my cry's for help.

I guess your rite, it wasn't a ****, because you wont admit it Im the one to blame?
No Not this time this wasn't my fault.
My parents still love me, what will yours think when they see you locked up behind bars like a vault.
because again I suppose my **** was my fault.

If I sit on my roof
and block out the light from my house,
I can forget that I exist.
I can swim among the constellations
and lose myself in the bittersweet triviality
of our existence.
I can break free from the intoxication
of my life wasted on autopilot.
I can pretend that I am merely thoughts,
free of the weight of a life
and of society
and of reality.
I can question things
and depersonalize
and forget this anchor of a body
and all its bitter consequences.
But,
for now,
all I can do
is lay beneath the stars
and forget.

As still as water,
Yet not even half as calming.
Foretells the darkness.

Dear future  boyfriend....
I will assume you will break my heart even before we speak.
And hold on to every word like it were the air that I breath.
I will ignore the good things that you do.
And search for every mistake meticulously.
I promise to never have faith in you and to always expect you to fail.
I promise to put you on a pedestal  that you'll fall off of
and to always go running to my friends the second you speak out agents me.
And when I do something wrong and you say something about it,
I promise to always find a way to blame it on you,
Dear future boyfriend I promise to drain you emotionally so that you cant ever find the strength to leave me,
And to always ,make you feel like you cant leave me alone.
Dear future boyfriend, I promise that when it ends ill make Facebook posts about it so that all my friends can see,
and so that they can all take part in a breakup that was largely to do with me ...
Dear future boyfriend, pleas.....don't be my future boyfriend

Theirs a daisy in my tea cup.
Theirs a sun set setting high.
Theirs a river running past me.
And the deer are striding by.
Their are feathers stuck inside the tea ***,
and their are a few in my cup.

We  remember, or at least most of us do.
The lesions we were taught
about a people who are now few
fewer than the patches of grass in our city parks
fewer than the smog less city's that
have wilted our daisy hearts

Now we've gone and built our world
on top of their prairie plains
we gave them land to live on
but reservations aren't the same

From my finger tips to my elbow
my arms are covered in paint.
They are all different colors,
but the idea is the same,
to create something beautiful,
a sunset, a rain shower .
an old pine tree or a flower.
I don't paint with anger,
I paint with love
I paint with my heart,
shouldn't that be enough
I see beauty in what could be
But so many before me have written it out
what beauty is supposed to be
One color, don't mix, separate, don't  fix.
Yes one color can be beautiful,
and one can be bright.
But one without the others,' seems like a very plain sight
Why do we separate one from the other, why do we try to moderate one from another color.
The world around us is changing and yes we wont be hear forever
but we can stay together if we could only love  one another

id never tell you to love me if you cant
and
      id
          never
                   fall
                         for
                              you
If
  their
          wasn't
                      a
                        chance
stay if you want to but go if you don't
I wont hold on to you if you want to go.

grin penetrating my mind and your touch - your grab - sewn into my side
sinking as a summer without fin(n)s drowning in your baby blues,
boy
and fooling myself into early christmas hollyboughs? go-lightly on me, oh please!
A ****** bisou beneath mistletoe
with curled toes and auroral, idolising eyes
fantasising eyes
overall, decriminalising eyes
Annie excuse at (H)all to see you and
re
-vive (mes soins, votre sécurité)
-kindle (the ignition to my inspiration)
-pair (poles apart)
a pair in the most offensive of ways
my only vice is cleansing yours
but your sins or psyche?
am i wounded or warming?
my truly fatal frailty

cry yourself to sleep at night to the sounds of another pointless fight.
don't listen to mommy cry tonight, daddy doesn't mean to fight.
are you alright dear, are you ok?
I know it hurt when daddy drove away.
who would blame him you want to go.
You walk away but daddy drove.
     Years have gone, and so have you
along a tear stained avenue, with your mind and your manner to
you are your fathers son through and through.
      and just like him, children came, from a woman, you cant even remember her name.
Unlike him you tried to stay but just like he did you drove away.
      Your boys left now without a dad, you've given him no better life than you had.
Don't you remember crying yourself to sleep, doesn't matter the bottle you'll keep.
     While your boy learns to stand on his own two feet.