I don't mean to brag but
My friends are the absolute best
They'll beat the crap out of the person to hurt you
They'll protect you from the storm that is life
They'll make you smile when you just wanna cry
They'll give you that one thing you always wanted just for the hell of it
They'll get your fav author to send you a letter and a bunch of autographed stuff
They'll listen to you go on and on about your endless crushes
They'll set you up with someone
They'll allow you to go to your house whenever
They'll take your apple and do some weird stuff with it
They'll listen when you just need to vent
They'll love you unconditionally when you hate yourself
They'll hold you closer when you push them away

My friends are the family I never got

I'll Be Alone  Now
Daydreaming of the Future
"Ain't It Fun  Moving On?"
They'll ask.
But I haven't moved on.

It was some Holiday when we last talked.
You called me an Anklebiter
And I told you to Grow Up
You told me that I was just another One of Those Crazy Girls
But
I'm Not Angry Anymore
I'd just Hate to See Your Heart Break

This is Proof that
I'm Still Into You.
This song is my Last Hope.

My confidence
Hides my insecurities

My strength
Is  an illusion

My calm
Masks a *storm

I wish NYC had more stars so I could compare them to how dim they are to your eyes.

We're all just suicidal people
Telling others not to die.

I swear to god I'm done.
I'm done being sad
because you can't love me like I love you.
I'm done with you making me feel like dog ****.
I'm done like Shantanu.

I'm starting to be happy.
I'm starting to look for my own happiness.
I'm starting to be accept being alone.
I'm starting to not fall in love so easily.
After all, there's always Netflix, food and a warm bed.

I strum this guitar
In a methodical way
Like you did my heart

One cuts, two cuts, three cuts, four
You don't know what to do anymore.
Five cuts, six cuts, seven cuts, eight
Stop yourself before it's too late.
Ninth cut, tenth cut, eleventh twelfth
Put the blade back on the shelf.
Thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen
You don't know how much you mean.
Seventeen cuts, eighteen cuts, nineteen cuts, then twenty
You don't need anymore, you already have plenty.

I'm scarred
By the childhood I never had
By the love and care I never got
By the love that was unrequited
By the hurt I felt
By the pain in my heart
By the emptiness in my soul
By the lack of happiness
And abundance of sadness
By the blade in my hand
By you.

Kiss her.
Slowly, take your time, there’s no place you’d rather be.
Kiss her but not like you’re waiting for something else, like your hands beneath her shirt or her skirt or tangled up in her bra straps.
Nothing like that.
Kiss her like you’ve forgotten any other mouth that your mouth has ever touched.
Kiss her with a curious childish delight.
Laugh into her mouth, inhale her sighs.
Kiss her until she moans.
Kiss her with her face in your hands.
Or your hands in her hair.
Or pulling her closer at the waist.
Kiss her like you want to take her dancing.
Like you want to spin her into an open arena and watch her look at you like you’re the brightest thing she’s ever seen.
Kiss her like she’s the brightest thing you’ve ever seen.
Take your time.
Kiss her like the first and only piece of chocolate you’re ever going to taste.
Kiss her until she forgets how to count.
Kiss her stupid.
Kiss her silent.
Come away, ask her what 2+2 is and listen to her say your name in answer.

I love your eyes,
Shining like the universe in spring.
I love your kind gaze that's like the spring's sunlight.
I love your hair.
I love your smooth, silken hair that waves in the wind.
I love your lips.
I love your lips that give honey kisses
And let me hear lonely sighs.
I love your voice.
I love your high, sweet, pure voice that echoes in my heart.
I love your body.
Your slender waist which might break if I embrace it.
But what I love most is your heart.
Fragile and easily broken
But endlessly pure and beautiful.
Your soul, filled with kindness
Which never blames others and forgives all.

It's a dark and lonely place in here
Left with only ourselves
We imagine the worst
Some know that there is a better life outside
But continue to stay
Maybe it's because if you stay long enough
You get used to it
The darkness
The loneliness
It's the only thing we've ever known.

Others have the courage
They leave
Those who remain look up to them
For they have done what we all hope to do one day

For now I'll stay in here
For now I'm too scared
For now I'll stay in this closet

My love for you is complicated.
Sometimes you make me so aggravated,
while other times I'm just fascinated.

You are always so close to me.
They make me wish we could just be free
and from this world, we flee.

It's as if you make me want to want you.
I have no clue
what to do.

Just you are my one and only
Even if you make me feel so lonely.
But is our love just phony?

I paint a picture.
"Quite beautiful," I mutter to myself
Tears rolling down my cheeks.
The picture cries with me
Its ruby tears rolling down.

My brush glints in the sunlight
Rusty and stained as always.
My canvas filled with other paintings.
Some not even a day old.
I wipe the red tears and wrap it.

My brain says to stop this horrible painting
but my heart refuses.
It's gone through too much.
It wants to let it all go with these paintings.
These horrible, scarring, painful, disgusting paintings.

Our love can never be
No matter how dearly you love me
Others have no clue
Of how empty I feel without you

You'll forever be the Juliet to my Romeo
Always we shall meet up in that small one bedroom studio
Our love is greater than the gods
Maybe it can one day defeat all odds

But alas for now it's hidden
For now our love is forbidden