When the words don't come
And the thoughts stop short
I feel a sense of panic
And loss

Who am I if I have no thoughts?
What am I if I can't communicate?
I drop away from humanity
I fall out of society

They say that you should never
Push a loyal person
Past the point where they don't care.

Clearly you never heard that.
Or maybe you just don't care.
Either way, you've made a large mistake.

Because now all the anger
That I've been saving all these years,
All the fury I've been hiding-
Finally has release.

Every single person
That's ever done me wrong,
Every last wrong doing
That I have withstood,

Now falls upon your shoulders
Along with what you've done,
As if your own actions
Weren't bad enough alone.

They say that you should never
Push a loyal person
Past the point where they don't care.

But maybe now you've guessed
That it's far too late for you.
Because I'll smile and I'll laugh
I'll be pleasant around you.

You'll think that all is fine,
You'll fall into false comfort,
And when you try your games again
You'll fall flat upon your face.

Now?
Now I'm just angry.

"I figured I had nothing to apologize for."
You were wrong.
Unfathomably wrong.

Now?
Now I'm just angry.

You wonder why I have anxiety,
Trust issues, and depression too.
It's because of people just like you.

Now?
Now I'm just angry.

This has happened so many times.
That I can't even imagine such a thing
As a person who wouldn't hurt me.

Now?
Now I'm just angry.
I don't care anymore.
Do whatever you like.
But it won't be with me.

You finally gave in.
I could feel how tense you were;
How each nerve in your body felt-
Rejecting the situation against their will.

But then you gave in to yourself.
And then me.
You relaxed and your arm pulled in,
Pulling me with; you felt strong.

Your nose nudged the back of my head,
Making me smile into the dark.
You held me and the moment
As if it were the most important thing.

With each breath you took in
It filled the curve of my back,
And then I could breathe easy.
Because you finally gave in to us.

Tonight I say goodbye,
To the place that I grew up.
To the place in which I found myself.
To the place I learned the most.

Tonight I say goodbye,
To the place I feel at home.
To the place that makes me my best.
To the place that sets me free.

Tonight I say goodbye,
Because everything does end.
And it's time that I move on.
I might cry until I can't see,
I may miss this place in time.

Tonight I say goodbye.
But this place has made me who I am,
And I'll always be this person.
So this place will always be a part of me
No matter where I am.

I'm tired of reality
I want something new
I'm tired of reality
I want to move on

The place that I'm in
Is boring me now
This world that I'm in
Is always the same

I'm sick of these motions
I want new adventures
I'm sick of these rules
I want to re-write them

Sometimes I wish I could stop.
Pause a moment.
And live in it,
Forever.
Sit in eternity
With that feeling
Of happy perfection.
Never moving
Never changing
Never needing
Or wanting
Or aging.
Until one day
You just cease to exist.
Exiting with a surge
Of feeling and emotion.
Enough for a lifetime.
Then fading,
Into nothingness.