I find myself digging a hole,
Discovering my heart is what stole,
My love for myself and for others.
It yearns for something that words cannot describe.

I trip over my own feelings,
Needing help, needing healing.
I imagine myself all alone,
Staying separated, staying at home.

My mind tells me I’m not good but I know it’s untrue,
It’s time to give credit where credit is due.
I know I can do it but my mind is so weak.
What I’d die for is what my heart seeks.

I give up, I succumb comfort zones.
They’re the reason for being alone.
I climb up the mountain to face my fears,
But as I reach the end my eyes fill with tears.

I clear my mind of repeating thoughts,
Of regrets and memories sought over.
I’m locked in Satan’s dungeon of self-image,
Waiting to be rescued from this prison being hidden.

I search the forest for the security I lack,
But as I get weary I just want to go back,
To my home I never left before now.
What made me brave I can’t explain how.

You are so strong,
But feel so weak.
Only thinking wrongs,
And never the things,

Making you,
Nothing to hold,
Nothing to rue.
Don’t ever fold,

These feelings of love,
Know of your strengths,
Shine with your sun,
Not with your hate.

Life is too fast,
For fearful fate.
Please make it last,
Caress every day.

Hold your heart,
Don’t let it go,
I know it’s hard,
But you’ll never know,

If you keep holding back,
Never lighting matches.
You ask why you’re sad,
Cause you’ve never had it.

You’ve done it before,
Now do it again,
Walk fear’s shore,
Make it your friend.

I feel your pain,
I hear your cry.
I’ve felt your rain,
With tears of your sigh.

After I close,
Remember this,
If there’s something to know,
Know you are His.

The night may change,
Infinite difference.
But reject its pain,
Cause you’re never different.

Sometimes I wonder of things that could be,
Things of old made new into realities,
No longer trapped in my infinite dreams,
Appearing as distant as the marvelous beams,

Holding my life together, carrying my shame.
I may have lost hope but never the gain,
Of experiencing fear and holding it close,
If you’ve faced risk then you’d know what I know.

Sometimes I think of the matters at hand,
If they matter to me all that much.
But nothing involves me so why try to touch,
The poison that fills me whenever I blush?

I don’t know of options, never had freedom.
Unsure of character or, just lack of good reasons.
But this I know and this I will share,
The moments of fear that only I can tear.

Life is a tape stuck on record.
So why are you hesitating to lift off and soar?
You only get this breath once so breathe it with passion.
I’ve wasted so much of my life that I’ve had enough of it.

There is no playback button where you can rewind and revive,
The memories that you wasted and eventually sighed.
These moments don’t come back so live the ones you hold.
If moments had price tags they would instantly be sold.

When you try to rewind and sadly look back,
You just wasted the ten seconds that you once had.
You can’t change the buttons but you can change what they record.
So stop looking back, regretting and trying to hoard,

The memories that you once had and now are lost forever.
For if you’re asking for a time the answer is never.
Looks like God never got showed in life’s thankful header.
And yet we are writing to our past as if they were letters.