When I was young
I was naive and foolish
I used to chase after love
in all the wrong places,
in all the wrong people.

Now that I am older
I am not sure if I am any wiser
But my heart no longer desires love
It only yearns for peace.

Win;
At least I don't have to see you with her everyday now.

Loss;
I don't get to see you either, anymore.

You and I
A story unknown to the world
But felt by the universe
Every time we were together.

You and I
A love lost
But still alive somewhere
In the corner of our hearts.

You and I
Two roads that run side by side
But never meet.

You and I
Two pieces of a jigsaw puzzle
That never fit.

You and I
A secret buried deep in our hearts
That will never be revealed.

You and I
A blurry memory in our minds
That will perhaps one day be forgotten with time.

You and I
Two lost souls
That yearned for each other
But never found a way to one another.

You and I
A story that was never written in the stars
But still burned the brightest in our lives.

I won't let you
creep into my words anymore
No, I refuse to give you that power.

I will erase every trace of you in my veins,
banish every thought of you from my mind.


I will exorcise the ghost of you from my memory
I will be free of you-
This is I promise
even if it's the last thing I ever do,
I will die trying.

Because of you
she learned to cry
without making a sound

Because of you
she learned to hide her puffy eyes
with carefully applied concealer and eyeliner

Because of you
she learned to hide the marks on her wrist
with full sleeves and fancy bracelets

Because of you
she learned to not let someone in
through the walls she has built around her heart

Because of you
she learned to be on her own
and be comfortable with it

Because of you
she learned to love herself
in ways you never could.

Sometimes I look around me
and everything feels so fake -
I doubt
if I am real or not.

You and I
A miracle




................

Unwritten
In the stars

I live a life
without any regrets
I proudly wear
my mistakes,
my stupidity,
my scars of yesterdays-
as badges of honor.

Those are the things I have survived
Those are the experiences that taught me
of my incredible strength
of rising from the ashes
over and over again
like a phoenix.

Fall in love
with someone unattainable
to fall out of love
with someone unavailable.

I fall in love
rarely,
infrequently
but when I do
I fall in love
so fast
it spins my head.

One day
I will find you intolerable
and another
I will discover a piece of you
that resonates with me
lights a spark in me
and I will fall for you
in the blink of an eye
with all of you
and build an entire world
for the two of us.

But the world, most often,
turns out to be made of glass
just waiting to break apart
and I will fall down so hard
and hit the ground
just as fast as I fell in love.

It doesn't make a sound
when it breaks
but it hurts the loudest.

I want to
keep on looking at you
without being afraid of being caught.

I want to
reach out across the space between us
and hold your hand.

I want to
curve "I love you"
in letters in the palm of your hand.

I want to
ruffle the hair on top of your head
and kiss the tip of your nose.

I want to
feel the warmth of your hands,
cupping my face.

I want to
fall asleep
listening to the beat of your heart.

I want to
wake up and see the sunrise
on your face.

I want to
rush home after work
and tell each other
all about our day.

I want to
come home to you.

I want to
dance with you
in our living room
and under the starry sky on our rooftop.

I want to
live
in a one bedroom apartment
with you.

I want to
travel
the whole world
with you.

I want to
have fights with you
and then make up to you.

I want to
be the first
to wish you on all your birthdays.

I want to
celebrate our anniversary
even when we have hit our eighties.

I want to
be the one
you show all your scars to
and I want to
reveal to you
all the monsters that live in my head.

I want to
be the anchor
in your times of need
and I want you
as my lifeline for all of eternity.

I want to
grow old with you
and remain
forever young at heart.

I want to
spend this one lifetime
and the ones after this
loving you as you are,
knowing that you love me too.

they say,
as long as there is life
there is hope
but
can you spend your whole life
simply hoping?
maybe some things are just not meant to be
it is better to let those hopes turn to dust
before you do.

I don't talk
about you anymore
like I used to

Before,
I would speak of you
to anyone and everyone in my life,
sharing pieces of you with others
so much that people started wondering
if there was something between us.
It was never intentional
but rather an involuntary response
to the pull of gravity I felt towards you.

I used to like the way
your name sounded in my tongue
I used to practice uttering it
and whispering nothingness into your ears.

I used to say your name
like it was sacred

but now it has become taboo
to even think of your name
Every time it comes up in my mind
I have to hit the mental brakes,
I no longer mention you
to anyone else
it's like you do not even exist,
never did -
you are just the ghost of a name
that resides somewhere in my head,
collecting dust.

Why is it this way
and not that way?
Why can't life be just a li'l bit kinder?
Why do we have to make the best
of every worst situation?
Why do we have to find the strength to let go
when we want to hold on with all our lives?
Why can't everything be simpler?

Stay
with
me

Sit
by
my side

Reach out
your hand

Speak to me
in silence

I will understand

Somedays I wake up
and it feels like
it happened just yesterday
and not ages ago-
the memory is that crystal clear.
Maybe some ghosts
haunt us forever.

She was so used to the pain
she won't let happiness touch her
with a ten foot pole.

eyes
              that
                       won't
                                   stop
                                           raining

So tired
of living
in a concrete jungle
Filled with too many people
who are nothing
but strangers.

You will lose people
as you grow older
like coins falling
out of your pocket,
You will lose them
whether you like it or not,
even the ones who promised to stay
and the ones to whom you promised to keep.

Life is a paradox
of holding on and letting go.

So many words
swirl in my mind,
one jumping ahead of the other,
before I can grasp them
and make any sense.
They are always in a hurry it seems,
brewing up a storm,
and trying to find reason or rhyme in them
is a futile endeavor.
Let them dance,
cause a cacophony-
they only want your attention,
don't pay any heed to them-
they will only distract
and befuddle you.
You are supposed to be here
not in the chaos of words in your head.

They say, if someone you loved
didn't love you back,
you should take that love,
and spread it
in the world around you.
I have tried and tried
to do just that
but still, it won't fill the gap
that you left behind,
and all I feel is empty.

I am
better (off)
without you.

"Have I lost you?" he asked her that day.

"No," she replied smilingly,




"You never had me, but yes, you have surely lost the chance to ever have me. I don't do second chances."

All my pretense falls away
when I see you.
I forget the promise I made to myself
that I won't let you tug at my heart anymore.

All my resolution crumbles
when I see you
You still consume me
even without trying the slightest.

Perhaps, unloving you is a test
I am bound to fail
over and over again.

Concrete jungle
with swarms of people
more like robots,
less like humans,
always running after something,
round-the-clock,
and striving for something,
without even knowing what.
Confused, lost souls
forgotten to smell the rose,
give away time freely
as if time were endless.
Life is measured in-
how many degrees you earned
and the figure you have for your salary.
Families at home,
often neglected,
but we are doing it all for them,
and not for showing off to the society.
Relationships are more for-
status updates and Instagram likes,
but we don't have time for each other,
except may be on Valentine's day,
cause that is mandatory
to glorify our unconditional love to the world.

The cities are filled with buildings
after buildings,
but let's fill up that waterbody too;
there's no room for people after all;
who needs the greenery or nature?
Let's take it all.
We are humans.
We are supreme.
Everything is ours to claim and reign.

What a grand delusion we live with!

What have we done to the world?
What have we made of ourselves?

Let it out-
all the pain you keep hiding,
all the tears you keep holding inside.
It's okay
if the grief claws out of you.
Just remember-
even if it feels forever,
even if it feels infinite,
even if it feels too much-
it will pass.
You had hit lower than this before
and risen like a phoenix.
You can do it once more.
I promise.

I used to think
you were a miracle.
Now I know.
Sometimes,
even a curse
can disguise itself.