The night I hurt myself

No one knew

The room was full

But no one saw

I was right there

But also not there

No one knew

No one saw

More or less I bled in silence

In front of them

But in hiding

No one knew

No one saw

(Maybe no one really cared.)

I just let the words leave my head.
But they are so dark and heavy,
that they weigh me down even more than when they left me.

When I write, the weight is suppose to leave me
Not reappear when I read it
Where all the gates are now closed surrounding all that is me
And my heart is locked and the key is nowhere to be found


Swedish

Jag lät orden bara lämna mitt huvud
Men de är så mörka och tunga att de väger ner mig mer än när de lämnade mig.

När jag skriver är det meningen att det tunga ska lämna mig. Inte läsa in mig och stänga alla grindar och spärra in mitt hjärta

"I'm better now."
I tell them when they ask
how I've recovered
from the war I went through a year ago.
And it's true. I am better now.
But scars don't leave.
And there are still days
I walk, looking up at the flowers
on the trees,
wondering if you ever think about me.