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"unshaven" poems
Something happened this morning when I awoke to you lightly breathing. It was sublime. My chin rested on your shoulder the skin so soft on my cheek. I couldn’t help but kiss the sweetness. On nights when I sleep alone it does not matter how many blankets wrap my restless body. I wake cold. Nothing is as warm as your arms. Like that of a Texas breeze on an August night. I can only think to kiss your unshaven face. The kisses are planted gently, first your cheek, then your temple, and your forehead, when I come to the tip of your nose you stir slightly, but I cannot stop. I want it more then the ocean waves need the shoreline to crash upon. Looking at your face I smile at the odd way we met. With a breath of *** and an intoxicated grin we spoke. “I don’t like you” “Yea? Well I don’t like you first!” Like children picking on their first crush. Tying to fight back the giggles. Our childish ways still run strong. In your absence I sit and watch the ticking minutes laugh at my uneasiness. Hours with others are mere minutes with you. The clocks envy our cherished time and tick-tock more rapidly when we are alone. All our time would never be enough. When we get lost in each other, the way the lonely roadrunner looses himself as he runs up and down the oak covered hills, it is love at its best. This morning when the soft breathes you took woke me and my chin rested upon your shoulder, something happened. As the kisses fell and your eyes continued to sleep; I realized that this is where I belong. Drifting slowly into love with you.
0
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013 at 7:30 PM UTC
Epiphany
Something happened this morning when I awoke to you lightly breathing. It was sublime. My chin rested on your shoulder the skin so soft on my cheek. I couldn’t help but kiss the sweetness. On nights when I sleep alone it does not matter how many blankets wrap my restless body. I wake cold. Nothing is as warm as your arms. Like that of a Texas breeze on an August night. I can only think to kiss your unshaven face. The kisses are planted gently, first your cheek, then your temple, and your forehead, when I come to the tip of your nose you stir slightly, but I cannot stop. I want it more then the ocean waves need the shoreline to crash upon. Looking at your face I smile at the odd way we met. With a breath of *** and an intoxicated grin we spoke. “I don’t like you” “Yea? Well I don’t like you first!” Like children picking on their first crush. Tying to fight back the giggles. Our childish ways still run strong. In your absence I sit and watch the ticking minutes laugh at my uneasiness. Hours with others are mere minutes with you. The clocks envy our cherished time and tick-tock more rapidly when we are alone. All our time would never be enough. When we get lost in each other, the way the lonely roadrunner looses himself as he runs up and down the oak covered hills, it is love at its best. This morning when the soft breathes you took woke me and my chin rested upon your shoulder, something happened. As the kisses fell and your eyes continued to sleep; I realized that this is where I belong. Drifting slowly into love with you.
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66
I think the scent of bug spray on my palms will now forever remind me of you and the late night (early morning) we spent sitting in your car, drawing awfully unskillful portraits on the back of each other’s hands in 
dim light and 3 a.m. stillness. (I wonder if you could tell that doodling on your skin was just an excuse to touch you.) I wanted so badly to let my fingers find yours 
as we laid back in our seats 
and peeked out the rolled down 
windows at the infinite stars scattered above us in the 
early August night sky. I told you I wouldn’t kiss you, 
because I know my heart and 
how relentlessly it would 
replay how your lips felt on mine, and how it would ache knowing
 you couldn’t be mine,
 so I let you kiss my cheek instead,
 and the half a moment that I felt 
your unshaven face brush mine in the middle of the street at five in the morning feels like a fake memory. When you looked at me, I wanted to hide, because I was too afraid to read what words might’ve been written in your eyes, but I felt so content listening to the 
deep tone of your voice 
mix with the obnoxiously loud crickets singing in the trees 
surrounding us. I could’ve sat there with you till the stars disappeared and the sun took their place, but you walked me back home, and you left in the dark, and now I’m sitting in my bed thinking about how the hours between 2 and 5 a.m. have never felt so full.
0
Aug 5, 2014
Aug 5, 2014 at 10:50 AM UTC
We're Looking at the Same Stars
There's an awkward thrill I feel like wicked-wet rabies – Oh. Ah. Oh. To gaze over photos of the woman I created. With my warped perception, saturating and cropping everything into delicious oblivion. I am the knife as well as the ingredients that sauteed her together in a camera flash. She sits hot like heaven. And I want to stare at her picture all day until she comes to life. The woman I created, I hang up like perfected rotisserie and fall in love with her accidentally every day. Looking into those precisely underlined tiger-sex eyes of startling navy. Knowing their true dullness. Hissing at the free-swinging curls and the hours behind them. Loving the lie. The flowy top and sleek trousers gliding down lovely as Niagara over chaffing chub; all hidden. And thighs; unshaven. And that topical smile everyone likes to see, waiting to plummet into suicide like a kite hanging in one tight second. Her image is my greatest False accomplishment. I hang my portrait up on a wall of the internet for people of the world to migrate to the photo exhibit, my little show-off room. They make offers and toss compliments with their “I like this. I like this." nonsense. They don't know that the girl in the portrait, she isn't organic. They seem not to notice that she is something of a chemical flower. Her face is my face, only with whiteout poison-paste smoothed over twice. And they want to stare at her picture all day until she comes to life. Gazing upon her believed-to-be beauty, as I hang my paintbrush, she bites her body still as a painting, bruised and needled into perfect frame. She cries like Jesus Christ, as she is stared at, but not seen. I am the artist as well as the object. And the woman in the portrait is nothing, but dot after dot of manipulated color. And we want to stare at her picture all day until she comes to life.
0
Sep 7, 2014
Sep 7, 2014 at 9:52 AM UTC
Selfies
There's an awkward thrill I feel like wicked-wet rabies – Oh. Ah. Oh. To gaze over photos of the woman I created. With my warped perception, saturating and cropping everything into delicious oblivion. I am the knife as well as the ingredients that sauteed her together in a camera flash. She sits hot like heaven. And I want to stare at her picture all day until she comes to life. The woman I created, I hang up like perfected rotisserie and fall in love with her accidentally every day. Looking into those precisely underlined tiger-sex eyes of startling navy. Knowing their true dullness. Hissing at the free-swinging curls and the hours behind them. Loving the lie. The flowy top and sleek trousers gliding down lovely as Niagara over chaffing chub; all hidden. And thighs; unshaven. And that topical smile everyone likes to see, waiting to plummet into suicide like a kite hanging in one tight second. Her image is my greatest False accomplishment. I hang my portrait up on a wall of the internet for people of the world to migrate to the photo exhibit, my little show-off room. They make offers and toss compliments with their “I like this. I like this." nonsense. They don't know that the girl in the portrait, she isn't organic. They seem not to notice that she is something of a chemical flower. Her face is my face, only with whiteout poison-paste smoothed over twice. And they want to stare at her picture all day until she comes to life. Gazing upon her believed-to-be beauty, as I hang my paintbrush, she bites her body still as a painting, bruised and needled into perfect frame. She cries like Jesus Christ, as she is stared at, but not seen. I am the artist as well as the object. And the woman in the portrait is nothing, but dot after dot of manipulated color. And we want to stare at her picture all day until she comes to life.
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47
Neglect ing everything around me and inside me everything I am Rotting slowly unshaven legs smelling of sweat and lost love ******* on top of the sheets and my clean laundry dirtying without care Neglect ing myself and the giving of a care
0
Aug 7, 2013
Aug 7, 2013 at 8:32 PM UTC
Neglect
~ Aurora Borealis Under the arch of a starry sky With a temperature well below zero I touched your soul with my warm hands Like an round aura, you reflected the universe Of our love... A labyrinth of roads that lead In stardust, your thoughts whirl as Small particles, and with pure reflection My Aurora Borealis you're so beautiful, robust And longing… I take you into my warm cabin Where we drink hot chocolate The icicles are in your unshaven beard I find you charming with your red hands I'll warm you up… The cold wind makes cracking our wooden hut And along the windows shrilled the sound In contrast with our warm fireplace The crackling of the wood is divine I look at you… My Aurora Borealis, you are so handsome With your thick winter coat still on, As purple and green sparks reach our Living room, where your dark hair glistens I kiss you… It will never be really dark In days of love, where light shines And see your reflection sparkle Where I could rest by your presence I am with you… ~ Elisa Laura © 2012 E. L.
0
Sep 13, 2012
Sep 13, 2012 at 8:57 PM UTC
~ Aurora Borealis
Mixing your whisky breath, your unshaven cheeks, your liquored-down smile in an orange bottle labeled B. WITHDRAWAL withdrawal withdrawal Advice from a man with unshaven cheeks, a ring around his eye, and a cross near his breast. *Withdrawal from him, be careful, withdrawal from him you’ll see.* Clenched fists and a bouncing ball of hair, tied, atop my head Sundays are slow, a holy ****** awaits. They teach we aren’t supposed to be here. They teach this is not home. Everyone is temporary, and the concept of forever: my methadone. But he’s only a pain reliever, you see.
0
Dec 19, 2014
Dec 19, 2014 at 10:28 PM UTC
(i wish i had enough energy to finish this, but i'm in too much pain)
The unanswered phone calls, the unopened mail, the half pack of cigarettes, all witnessed the tale. The half eaten sandwich, the fully drunk scotch, the out of date calendar, the unticking watch. The smell of stale sweat, and the stains on the sheet. The small empty bottle, the drug store receipt. This is the story, of the unshaven guy, alone in the bedroom, escaping the lie.
0
Feb 26, 2012
Feb 26, 2012 at 12:03 PM UTC
Escaping the lie
On the first day, he was pushed robust in his stance, the other forced, this boy down the spiral staircase of the Catholic church, the school had renovated, the Spring before Isaac had begun his studies, at the high school. Ballet was his passion, Latin was the language that so effortlessly, fluently was spoken from his lips in class as he smiled at his Professor, another victory accomplished in academia so proud were his parents, of their blue eyed boy. Jonah was the reject, the older brother he had been kicked out of school, not once, but twice, and was often found with a joint, his unshaven face wrapped around one of the girls, from the all girls school that ran alongside Isaacs all boys. Issac was hurt, a further blow to his stomach, rendered him broken as a waterfall of tears ran down his bruised and cut face, so ashamed as other pupils laughed, staring, pointing until the final bell rang as they fled from the high ceilings and narrow corridors. Wrapped in a ball, he waited for all halls and students to clear, and as he rolled over, picking himself up he took to the washroom, knowing he needed to be presentable for his mother waiting for him at the school gate brimming with pride, at her boys scholarship. All his dreams, mystical and serene, Romeo and Juliet fluid streams of poetry of Elliot, Poe, Hughes and of course Wilde and those love letters of Beethoven math, biology, all paled into insignificance he was born a writer, a dancer, a drawer, sketching and typing his heart to a page, prose a future love would read. Johan saw his mother's car pull up as he raced and giggled with Saskia leading her astray, he promised her all the things those boys always did, and of course not to break her sweet sixteen heart, unlike other boys as his mother smoked another Camel, the two lovers jumped into his truck, Johnny Cash blaring from speakers laughing hysterically, the world at their feet. By 4pm, Isaac was ready to leave school, tentatively walking out the main door, down concrete slabs as steps, no predators in sight he couldn't hide the dark circles under his eyes that formed as bruises, knowing he was fortunate to have not been damaged further by the haunting before last period. Walking to the gates, he listened through headphones; Tchaikovsky his release his home his saving grace. © Sia Jane
0
Jan 10, 2014
Jan 10, 2014 at 6:53 PM UTC
a moral evil
On the first day, he was pushed robust in his stance, the other forced, this boy down the spiral staircase of the Catholic church, the school had renovated, the Spring before Isaac had begun his studies, at the high school. Ballet was his passion, Latin was the language that so effortlessly, fluently was spoken from his lips in class as he smiled at his Professor, another victory accomplished in academia so proud were his parents, of their blue eyed boy. Jonah was the reject, the older brother he had been kicked out of school, not once, but twice, and was often found with a joint, his unshaven face wrapped around one of the girls, from the all girls school that ran alongside Isaacs all boys. Issac was hurt, a further blow to his stomach, rendered him broken as a waterfall of tears ran down his bruised and cut face, so ashamed as other pupils laughed, staring, pointing until the final bell rang as they fled from the high ceilings and narrow corridors. Wrapped in a ball, he waited for all halls and students to clear, and as he rolled over, picking himself up he took to the washroom, knowing he needed to be presentable for his mother waiting for him at the school gate brimming with pride, at her boys scholarship. All his dreams, mystical and serene, Romeo and Juliet fluid streams of poetry of Elliot, Poe, Hughes and of course Wilde and those love letters of Beethoven math, biology, all paled into insignificance he was born a writer, a dancer, a drawer, sketching and typing his heart to a page, prose a future love would read. Johan saw his mother's car pull up as he raced and giggled with Saskia leading her astray, he promised her all the things those boys always did, and of course not to break her sweet sixteen heart, unlike other boys as his mother smoked another Camel, the two lovers jumped into his truck, Johnny Cash blaring from speakers laughing hysterically, the world at their feet. By 4pm, Isaac was ready to leave school, tentatively walking out the main door, down concrete slabs as steps, no predators in sight he couldn't hide the dark circles under his eyes that formed as bruises, knowing he was fortunate to have not been damaged further by the haunting before last period. Walking to the gates, he listened through headphones; Tchaikovsky his release his home his saving grace. © Sia Jane
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63
EAST BOSTON, 1996 ON THE BUS Franz Wright It's one thing when you're twenty-one, and I was way past twenty-one. With unshaven face half concealed in the collar of some deceased porcine philanthropist's black cashmere rag of a coat, I knew that I looked like a suicide returning an overdue book to the library. Almost everyone else did as well, but I found no particular solace in this; at best, the fact awakened some diverting speculations on the comparative benefits of waiting in front of a ditch to be shot alone or in company of others, and then whether one would prefer these last hypothetical others to be friends, family, enemies, total or relative strangers. Would you hold hands? Or would you rather like a good **** sapiens monster employ them to cover your genitals? What percentage would lose bowel control? And given time restrictions - and assuming some still had the ability to move - would ostracism result? Anyway, I knew the rules on this bus. No eye contact: the eyes of the terrified terrify. Look like you know where you're going, possess ample change to get there, and don't move your lips when you talk to yourself: the destroyed and sick, the poor, the hungry and the disturbed estrange. The badly dressed estrange, even, and that is uncalled for. The degree of one's power to estrange will increase in direct proportion to the depth of need for others. Do not cry. This can only bring about, on the one hand, an instant condition of banishment from the sole available companionship, or on the other, a near fatal beating (one more disappointment). Just follow the simple instruction if you ever come here. It's easy to remember - any idiot can do it. Don't cry, the world has abandoned us.
0
Feb 27, 2017
Feb 27, 2017 at 7:59 AM UTC
On the Bus (Franz Wright)
EAST BOSTON, 1996 ON THE BUS Franz Wright It's one thing when you're twenty-one, and I was way past twenty-one. With unshaven face half concealed in the collar of some deceased porcine philanthropist's black cashmere rag of a coat, I knew that I looked like a suicide returning an overdue book to the library. Almost everyone else did as well, but I found no particular solace in this; at best, the fact awakened some diverting speculations on the comparative benefits of waiting in front of a ditch to be shot alone or in company of others, and then whether one would prefer these last hypothetical others to be friends, family, enemies, total or relative strangers. Would you hold hands? Or would you rather like a good **** sapiens monster employ them to cover your genitals? What percentage would lose bowel control? And given time restrictions - and assuming some still had the ability to move - would ostracism result? Anyway, I knew the rules on this bus. No eye contact: the eyes of the terrified terrify. Look like you know where you're going, possess ample change to get there, and don't move your lips when you talk to yourself: the destroyed and sick, the poor, the hungry and the disturbed estrange. The badly dressed estrange, even, and that is uncalled for. The degree of one's power to estrange will increase in direct proportion to the depth of need for others. Do not cry. This can only bring about, on the one hand, an instant condition of banishment from the sole available companionship, or on the other, a near fatal beating (one more disappointment). Just follow the simple instruction if you ever come here. It's easy to remember - any idiot can do it. Don't cry, the world has abandoned us.
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51
tattoo ourselves in electric ink memorializing calendars, diaries of observantional digits, black on white, no gray, birthdays, anniversaries, dates of passing, starting lines, occasional achievements, departure dates, even glaring failures, sundial mundane records of diurnal habitude…even defining self by, bye, byte marks upon flesh, upon our calendar *not my first trip-tracking, he ruefully rues, wry smiling, many voyages of indeterminate measuring length, leaving litter of arrays of hopeful estimations & destinations, each unequal, any or all possibilities, each day notated, without critique or commentary, the numbers are the gaols (jails) of goals, target, indeterminate determination, terrific, horrific, introspections, inverse images resolve, resolute* a year ago, +/- a few days,, new travelogue commenced, notated but not annotated, just  numerical truths, (sans comments for the divine nature of numbers don’t lie) and today my calculator app informs, that I am now 19.4 % lesser, but that clarifies less than expected naturally this provokes a natty, spirited, self-inquiry, lessened, lessor, for better or for worse? have the physical alterations accompanying this reduction mean exactly what, if, it should be, a greater lesser? here is the hard part. your have always been a mirror~poet, laughing, bemoaning the unvarnished, unshaven AM sightings of a human perpetual dissatisfied, the external never denying the interior “less~than,” a J Peterman catalogue of weathered ****** expressions, counter-parted by multiple Venn diagram intersections, of experiential labeled bits & pieces of emotional empirical less than good, not even close to perfect, so now that I am *gaunt, spare, lean, grayed, narrower, again ruefully rue, the even more visible truth reflection eye~hidden:* I, am the sum of the weight of my history, my deeds, my disbeliefs, murderous deeds, weak choices and that hasn’t changed nary an ounce, no matter many times examined, indeed I am forever a lesser man, there, internal infernal too…
0
Apr 9, 2023
Apr 9, 2023 at 2:12 PM UTC
19.4% lesser
tattoo ourselves in electric ink memorializing calendars, diaries of observantional digits, black on white, no gray, birthdays, anniversaries, dates of passing, starting lines, occasional achievements, departure dates, even glaring failures, sundial mundane records of diurnal habitude…even defining self by, bye, byte marks upon flesh, upon our calendar *not my first trip-tracking, he ruefully rues, wry smiling, many voyages of indeterminate measuring length, leaving litter of arrays of hopeful estimations & destinations, each unequal, any or all possibilities, each day notated, without critique or commentary, the numbers are the gaols (jails) of goals, target, indeterminate determination, terrific, horrific, introspections, inverse images resolve, resolute* a year ago, +/- a few days,, new travelogue commenced, notated but not annotated, just  numerical truths, (sans comments for the divine nature of numbers don’t lie) and today my calculator app informs, that I am now 19.4 % lesser, but that clarifies less than expected naturally this provokes a natty, spirited, self-inquiry, lessened, lessor, for better or for worse? have the physical alterations accompanying this reduction mean exactly what, if, it should be, a greater lesser? here is the hard part. your have always been a mirror~poet, laughing, bemoaning the unvarnished, unshaven AM sightings of a human perpetual dissatisfied, the external never denying the interior “less~than,” a J Peterman catalogue of weathered ****** expressions, counter-parted by multiple Venn diagram intersections, of experiential labeled bits & pieces of emotional empirical less than good, not even close to perfect, so now that I am *gaunt, spare, lean, grayed, narrower, again ruefully rue, the even more visible truth reflection eye~hidden:* I, am the sum of the weight of my history, my deeds, my disbeliefs, murderous deeds, weak choices and that hasn’t changed nary an ounce, no matter many times examined, indeed I am forever a lesser man, there, internal infernal too…
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43
This year, Spring has been stopped in its tracks. Incessant rain has driven life underground, so as a diversion, we're putting on a play. It's not the real world, rather a representation of it. The director is a control freak, so her role is perfect- she can dictate without having to act. Rehearsals take place in the Philharmonic Hall where the local band used to practice. But the young have all gone to the city looking for work, so the drum kit in the corner stays shrouded in a black cloth and the unplayed snooker table supports our props. On the stage, the backdrop is dominated by a church. Its steeple points to God only knows where, aiming to instill pure thoughts. Impossible to believe, its true aim is to inject fear into its people- depending on your point of view. The main player likes to be different. He turns up. A vain attempt to give some structure to his life. Late as usual, he's unshaven, and drowsy with wine. No one can decide whether he's in character or himself. Waiting for our cue, we stand on the narrow balcony, flicking damp cigarettes into the river of rain below. Eventually, we all change, put on our monstrous armour, become the same curious creatures following the same script.   Except one.... who refuses to change, deciding in his own mind where he will play his part. So he pulls on his proofed coat and heads out for the bar. Outside, the power is off. The streets are silent. Even the cafes have closed earlier than usual, tables and chairs left out in the rain chained together, like prisoners crying for release. He slips along the cobbled streets, chanting his lines in time with his own footsteps: 'There are more dead people than living....the living are getting rarer.' Even he's not sure if he's quite himself or still in character. Briefly, the clouds part to reveal the cold light of the moon, the only thing in which he has absolute faith to guide him on his way. copyright © Caroline Grace 2013
0
Apr 26, 2013
Apr 26, 2013 at 1:07 PM UTC
Rhinoceros ( a tribute to Eugene Onesco)
This year, Spring has been stopped in its tracks. Incessant rain has driven life underground, so as a diversion, we're putting on a play. It's not the real world, rather a representation of it. The director is a control freak, so her role is perfect- she can dictate without having to act. Rehearsals take place in the Philharmonic Hall where the local band used to practice. But the young have all gone to the city looking for work, so the drum kit in the corner stays shrouded in a black cloth and the unplayed snooker table supports our props. On the stage, the backdrop is dominated by a church. Its steeple points to God only knows where, aiming to instill pure thoughts. Impossible to believe, its true aim is to inject fear into its people- depending on your point of view. The main player likes to be different. He turns up. A vain attempt to give some structure to his life. Late as usual, he's unshaven, and drowsy with wine. No one can decide whether he's in character or himself. Waiting for our cue, we stand on the narrow balcony, flicking damp cigarettes into the river of rain below. Eventually, we all change, put on our monstrous armour, become the same curious creatures following the same script.   Except one.... who refuses to change, deciding in his own mind where he will play his part. So he pulls on his proofed coat and heads out for the bar. Outside, the power is off. The streets are silent. Even the cafes have closed earlier than usual, tables and chairs left out in the rain chained together, like prisoners crying for release. He slips along the cobbled streets, chanting his lines in time with his own footsteps: 'There are more dead people than living....the living are getting rarer.' Even he's not sure if he's quite himself or still in character. Briefly, the clouds part to reveal the cold light of the moon, the only thing in which he has absolute faith to guide him on his way. copyright © Caroline Grace 2013
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35
Lazy me. Still in last night's Rust Never Sleeps T and boxers. Unshaven. Hair pointed in cardinal directions while blue sky frowns down upon me for smokin' up its air. Mockingbirds playing the guess me game again. Bluebird splashes in the bath giving me a subtle hint. Mr. Cardinal and Blue Grosbeak compliment each other on their choice of colors. Yellow and Orange daylilies compete in their own beauty pageant while hibiscus shares her flowers with bees. Humminbird humming a happy song. My sweet mutt Daisy is embarrassed to be sitting out here beside me. Time to go in and let nature bask again. r ~ 6/15/14
0
Jun 15, 2014
Jun 15, 2014 at 4:47 PM UTC
Nature Mocks Me
Night beckons to strange people. Actually, if you can accept this premise, then the mind makes everyone strange. And still yet, there is something specific about darkness, I cannot put my finger on it, that sends odd sparks of real life on a mission to city street corners. I hide in my car after leaving the café with the hope of seeing, "The Pigtailed Man." This isn't his name. However, I need say no more to any stranger for him to envision my character. We objectify him and his image becomes clear even when spotted in narrowed alleyway darkness. He has a beautiful wife with locks past her shoulder of auburn and lillies, and two wonderfully bright children who sit on his knee when listening to nighty-night, bedtime stories. Their ringing laughter illuminates the darkest corners of their happy home. They'll never know why he needs to go bye-bye at dangerous evening hours, hunting sour scowls from passers-by. He's unkempt: legs unshaven, chin covered by midnight shadow, beer belly hanging over his plaid picnic-basket red schoolgirl skirt, and his face sags as if a topical novocaine was applied generously to his chubby, rosy cheeks. Upon seeing his aimless strut and dead-to-self eyes, I wonder: Where does he dress? Does he put his outfit on from plastic grocery bag around the block from the lamp-lit looks of the neighbors' friendly daytime greetings? More importantly, if I were friend and was to catch him in the act, would I say anything? Darkness calls out the most intriguing creatures. We're afraid to call them "human beings," because being human most certainly does not look like this. Or, does it not look like this? Shadows claw walls around all because not one body projects light. There are some who know, and some who appease. The pigtails hang to his knees as he stares at the mannequins of pretty women in the window of the closed department store.
0
Aug 17, 2012
Aug 17, 2012 at 4:05 AM UTC
A Shadow Will Follow Wherever You Go
Night beckons to strange people. Actually, if you can accept this premise, then the mind makes everyone strange. And still yet, there is something specific about darkness, I cannot put my finger on it, that sends odd sparks of real life on a mission to city street corners. I hide in my car after leaving the café with the hope of seeing, "The Pigtailed Man." This isn't his name. However, I need say no more to any stranger for him to envision my character. We objectify him and his image becomes clear even when spotted in narrowed alleyway darkness. He has a beautiful wife with locks past her shoulder of auburn and lillies, and two wonderfully bright children who sit on his knee when listening to nighty-night, bedtime stories. Their ringing laughter illuminates the darkest corners of their happy home. They'll never know why he needs to go bye-bye at dangerous evening hours, hunting sour scowls from passers-by. He's unkempt: legs unshaven, chin covered by midnight shadow, beer belly hanging over his plaid picnic-basket red schoolgirl skirt, and his face sags as if a topical novocaine was applied generously to his chubby, rosy cheeks. Upon seeing his aimless strut and dead-to-self eyes, I wonder: Where does he dress? Does he put his outfit on from plastic grocery bag around the block from the lamp-lit looks of the neighbors' friendly daytime greetings? More importantly, if I were friend and was to catch him in the act, would I say anything? Darkness calls out the most intriguing creatures. We're afraid to call them "human beings," because being human most certainly does not look like this. Or, does it not look like this? Shadows claw walls around all because not one body projects light. There are some who know, and some who appease. The pigtails hang to his knees as he stares at the mannequins of pretty women in the window of the closed department store.
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49
The alarm clock rings and once again the rooster sings the morning new. Slumbering flowers lift their petals to drink the drops of dew.   Reliable Sun vanquishes the darkness as he lightens the sky.   I see an honored guest is in the garden, his tiny nametag reads... butterfly.        But on the other side of town        someone struggles with        addiction.  Habits grab hard, break will powers  in two. The will becomes won't and the power is all through. Satiated, temporaneously satisfied. only till the next time the habit has to be gratified. The victim moves on trying to reassemble his day Avoid a crooked roaded relapse, along the way. Oh ghost of the host why must repitition repeat the most and feel so good in its continuation? Why must familiarity breed the need for more familiar feelings? To the point of killing control, sealing a fate, dealing defeat, stifle healing.      If your out there guardian soul, spirit helper, what's your roll, your goal?   Guiding with helping hand or let stand the habitualized habit man. Isn't there  a self preservation station within? A gland or impulse control button to switch from sin to win? Even Edgar Allan Poe stubbed his toe on a ten step program trying to get in the door. Ill-begotten and craven, drunken and unshaven cried the raven...never more. Guiding spirit it ends here!          No more slave to the crave or impulse picking from the addiction tree. The need to repeat and repeat the pattern becomes a self fulfilling prophesy. Back to normalacy, complacency, it's a moderation that one seeks. To enjoy the ****** of bells, hallalulah wails, a babies dimpled cheeks. Can you do that Spirit helper, please. Let sing the bodies vibration.  No more internal damnation. No more self flagellation. Allow to draw power from these words. Think of this all as an intervention!
0
Jun 25, 2018
Jun 25, 2018 at 6:52 PM UTC
Addicted to Habit
The alarm clock rings and once again the rooster sings the morning new. Slumbering flowers lift their petals to drink the drops of dew.   Reliable Sun vanquishes the darkness as he lightens the sky.   I see an honored guest is in the garden, his tiny nametag reads... butterfly.        But on the other side of town        someone struggles with        addiction.  Habits grab hard, break will powers  in two. The will becomes won't and the power is all through. Satiated, temporaneously satisfied. only till the next time the habit has to be gratified. The victim moves on trying to reassemble his day Avoid a crooked roaded relapse, along the way. Oh ghost of the host why must repitition repeat the most and feel so good in its continuation? Why must familiarity breed the need for more familiar feelings? To the point of killing control, sealing a fate, dealing defeat, stifle healing.      If your out there guardian soul, spirit helper, what's your roll, your goal?   Guiding with helping hand or let stand the habitualized habit man. Isn't there  a self preservation station within? A gland or impulse control button to switch from sin to win? Even Edgar Allan Poe stubbed his toe on a ten step program trying to get in the door. Ill-begotten and craven, drunken and unshaven cried the raven...never more. Guiding spirit it ends here!          No more slave to the crave or impulse picking from the addiction tree. The need to repeat and repeat the pattern becomes a self fulfilling prophesy. Back to normalacy, complacency, it's a moderation that one seeks. To enjoy the ****** of bells, hallalulah wails, a babies dimpled cheeks. Can you do that Spirit helper, please. Let sing the bodies vibration.  No more internal damnation. No more self flagellation. Allow to draw power from these words. Think of this all as an intervention!
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56
Come see black night.  Black night proposes                                                       more Than madness in a prophet's dream, sets free A lean uncertainty, sweet taste of all We dare not see. My sweet Kathryn, you were older than me, Knew all the black mountains--Olson, Creely, Duncan, Morley, Dorn... While I                                            was learning Levertov.  Your dark, unshaven armpits Drove me wild.  I understood the honor Of that crazy night--how could feather leave you--                our dance at the outlaw bar, Your sapphic gaze bemused by coal miners, In cowboy boots, as the band played Haggard, Coe, Willie, Waylon, Johnny Cash, Kristofferson & Emmy Lou.  I wouldn't trade it for a date With Miss Brazil, or Russia as it were-- Some people say you made that up, Changed heritage and grew the hair to seem more European.  I couldn't care Less. A great dark mystery I loved Now thirty-seven years ago with me Just old enough to drink and you come down From Bingington, I loved the way you said That frozen town, where your husband lingered, Teaching English to native speakers. I know you still loved him. I think you loved Me, but needed a woman's touch the same As I.  Strange how a night can be recalled More than years, one drunken naked sunrise, Pillow talk instead of class.  I ditched the speech At PBK, can't remember what they Fed us, coming for you in a straight shift Chevy pickup, red as the night was black.
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Oct 13, 2018
Oct 13, 2018 at 8:38 PM UTC
Black Night
Come see black night.  Black night proposes                                                       more Than madness in a prophet's dream, sets free A lean uncertainty, sweet taste of all We dare not see. My sweet Kathryn, you were older than me, Knew all the black mountains--Olson, Creely, Duncan, Morley, Dorn... While I                                            was learning Levertov.  Your dark, unshaven armpits Drove me wild.  I understood the honor Of that crazy night--how could feather leave you--                our dance at the outlaw bar, Your sapphic gaze bemused by coal miners, In cowboy boots, as the band played Haggard, Coe, Willie, Waylon, Johnny Cash, Kristofferson & Emmy Lou.  I wouldn't trade it for a date With Miss Brazil, or Russia as it were-- Some people say you made that up, Changed heritage and grew the hair to seem more European.  I couldn't care Less. A great dark mystery I loved Now thirty-seven years ago with me Just old enough to drink and you come down From Bingington, I loved the way you said That frozen town, where your husband lingered, Teaching English to native speakers. I know you still loved him. I think you loved Me, but needed a woman's touch the same As I.  Strange how a night can be recalled More than years, one drunken naked sunrise, Pillow talk instead of class.  I ditched the speech At PBK, can't remember what they Fed us, coming for you in a straight shift Chevy pickup, red as the night was black.
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33
The light of the television dimly lit two lovers, but not really. He stunk of wine from the lips and mauve teeth, she stunk of wine by proxy. her legs, only slightly unshaven, he stroked gently, which they both enjoyed, but not really. ***** pots, plates, and cutlery lay placid in the sink. They'll be washed sometime soon, and put away in   cabinets of wasted white wood, very soon, but not really. The floor, like them, began growing clothing like wild moss or ivy, and claimed the room & claimed them too. The movie, he'd recall, but, then, she would not. He watched the blood, and conflict, and at times laughed, and she saw him, and conflict, and didn't laugh at all, which he knew was strange, but not really. On the dim, small, screen, The lean and hungry man had his Nemesis on the sepia-tone ground, and finished it all, with rage and mercy, with a stomp to the heart. They watched, her eyes wide, for she knew this was them, her on the ground, and him in the air, and she gripped him a bit tighter, which he noticed, but not really, which she noticed, but not really. In the dimly lit room, they could not see they were alone, and it was true, only Bruce Lee & He, and She.
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May 27, 2016
May 27, 2016 at 4:59 PM UTC
Bruce Lee & He & She
Serenade of time / unravelling That which we don’t possess / Steers a passage Through adolescent grief / I travel his unshaven smile Contours of desire lead me here / I stay in his delicious deceit /
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Mar 1, 2012
Mar 1, 2012 at 4:11 PM UTC
Delicious Deceit
It began as an indirect interest Transformed into a simple acquaintanceship Quietly building A little unsure, both hopeful He watched my favorite movies with me I wish I could've invented a new word for cuddling; Our bodies fit like puzzle pieces that day It left me feeling shaky and scared as hell when we finally parted The first kiss was my favorite part Not knowing what was going to happen next I would've sat through thousands of his games I always said I didn't want to but I would've helped carry his equipment anywhere, anytime His left eyebrow always challenged me Your unshaven jaw always managed to find the perfect place against my cheek I've never spent that much time on the phone I can't imagine trying to laugh as quietly as possible in the latest hours of the night with anyone else I can't describe it That feeling when everything in the world is just right, because of one person? That's not what this was Because it was rarely ever right This isn't a love poem Puzzle pieces can't make up for endless arguments Being ignored all night Getting adjusted to the fact that "hockey friends" means that he's with his ex-girlfriend Seeing hand-written letters from her still in his room when I finally gave everything He was so in the wrong, so why was I being interrogated? Controlling is not the word I’d use, I was always given a choice But what was I supposed to do When he didn’t like anything I did but all I wanted was to be with him "I don’t want you to go to that party "I trust you, I just don’t trust them "I’ll talk to you after this movie I’m at with all my female friends "I don’t like how many guy friends you have "Do you think he’s cute? "Do you talk to other boys? "Do you think about other boys? "Promise? "Tell me that you promise "Are you lying? "Tell me that you’re not lying "You should tell me all the guys you were into before me "I don’t like when you talk about your exes "If you don’t want to argue then just hang up the phone "Why do you always hang up on me? "Why are you always mad about nothing? "Why do you always start arguments? Everything starts out innocent But it’s not long before things began their descent Getting to know people is exciting Until you start fighting Liking someone can be the best feeling in the world But it’s never long before everything becomes unfurled I’ve always heard that a good relationship takes compromise and hard work I heard that in a good relationship you have to apologize for what you’ve done wrong But eventually I was apologizing for everything and it didn’t even take long So how long do you have to know someone before all the good in your relationship peaks? How long do you have to know someone before they make a lasting impression?
0
Apr 16, 2013
Apr 16, 2013 at 10:54 PM UTC
February 2
It began as an indirect interest Transformed into a simple acquaintanceship Quietly building A little unsure, both hopeful He watched my favorite movies with me I wish I could've invented a new word for cuddling; Our bodies fit like puzzle pieces that day It left me feeling shaky and scared as hell when we finally parted The first kiss was my favorite part Not knowing what was going to happen next I would've sat through thousands of his games I always said I didn't want to but I would've helped carry his equipment anywhere, anytime His left eyebrow always challenged me Your unshaven jaw always managed to find the perfect place against my cheek I've never spent that much time on the phone I can't imagine trying to laugh as quietly as possible in the latest hours of the night with anyone else I can't describe it That feeling when everything in the world is just right, because of one person? That's not what this was Because it was rarely ever right This isn't a love poem Puzzle pieces can't make up for endless arguments Being ignored all night Getting adjusted to the fact that "hockey friends" means that he's with his ex-girlfriend Seeing hand-written letters from her still in his room when I finally gave everything He was so in the wrong, so why was I being interrogated? Controlling is not the word I’d use, I was always given a choice But what was I supposed to do When he didn’t like anything I did but all I wanted was to be with him "I don’t want you to go to that party "I trust you, I just don’t trust them "I’ll talk to you after this movie I’m at with all my female friends "I don’t like how many guy friends you have "Do you think he’s cute? "Do you talk to other boys? "Do you think about other boys? "Promise? "Tell me that you promise "Are you lying? "Tell me that you’re not lying "You should tell me all the guys you were into before me "I don’t like when you talk about your exes "If you don’t want to argue then just hang up the phone "Why do you always hang up on me? "Why are you always mad about nothing? "Why do you always start arguments? Everything starts out innocent But it’s not long before things began their descent Getting to know people is exciting Until you start fighting Liking someone can be the best feeling in the world But it’s never long before everything becomes unfurled I’ve always heard that a good relationship takes compromise and hard work I heard that in a good relationship you have to apologize for what you’ve done wrong But eventually I was apologizing for everything and it didn’t even take long So how long do you have to know someone before all the good in your relationship peaks? How long do you have to know someone before they make a lasting impression?
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58
Blade so cold so right Taking a joyride across my body Silver on white Shaking hand to guide it Tears, zips, leather and lace Crimson escaping fresh slit Lips, soft, supple, prickly Unshaven you nuzzle and drink My blood so desirable and sickly Stop stop blood clot Immune system allows you only some You draw away you've had a lot Violins in my ears The room spins and I fall down No sight takes away fears I awake, white room, methylated spirits Doctors tend to my open scars The feeling is so right
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Mar 5, 2015
Mar 5, 2015 at 11:07 PM UTC
Blood Lust
Oh Joy, Oh Great Heavens Above, How I like to lingeringly slaver o'er The fartleberries hanging humunguously Out of your **** cleft like bunches of mouldering grapes, And to gaze upon the lusciously stale shitstains Decorating your hirsute ********** You so rarely wash and your dumps are omnipotent And you are too mean to buy any **** wipes. You moan quite loudly in colonic ecstacy As I plumb the Stygian depths of your sit-upon place, My nose diving daintily like a woodpecker's beak Smeared with poo-bits, seeking Nirvana In your ****** paradise, brown love-tunnel Serenaded by the poets since Time began! Nowhere in all the Hershey Universe can there be A pongier rimmee than you, O unshaven beauty of mine! My probing tongue is covered with nutty brown paste, Your sweet excremental delight makes me drool In joy, as I personhandle myself "down there"; Ignoring the most elemental rules of hygiene. But sadly there is a fly in the ointment Indeed a whole ******* barrelful of them: Not only will I get a very nasty E-coli infection But I'll have bad breath tomorrow at chapel.
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Mar 11, 2015
Mar 11, 2015 at 1:45 PM UTC
Cheeks
It's not as special as it sounds. Although the title is exact. I met the creator of the universe In the dusty isle of discount mystery novels. Had I not immediately known it was God I would have profiled him a ****** predator. Late middle aged and unshaven. You're probably wondering but don't ask me. I just knew, and you would to. I asked him if he owned the place. He said no, that he was the manager To this tiny, tucked away bookstore. He appeared to be an unhappy, lonely man. There was a combination of comfort And disappointment in this. "Is there something you want to ask me?" Of course there was. "Why do you do this to all of us?" He examined his fingernails Pushing back his cuticals. I could see the yellow of wax in his ears. "I found myself existing. Just the same way that you did." He started with a sigh. "I didn't understand, and I'm still not sure I do. Why do you live the way you do? I was created and I try to make the best of it just like you. You see, I'm still trying to figure it all out. I fail and I succeed. I like to think I'm getting better."
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Jul 21, 2015
Jul 21, 2015 at 2:25 PM UTC
I Met God in a Bookstore
The old man gazed at the sun about to set And its molten core soon to dissolve in the sea Scratching his head with tremulous hands And running his fingers on the stubble of his unshaven face He held once more tight to his wheel chair Casually he had a glance at his hands Those dry, weak and shriveled hands Gone wrinkled with passing years! His hands once so busy are now limp His days once so brisk are now long and dull He noticed the discolored patches on his skin Under them the lattice of tortuous veins on the dorsum They run down to join with the bigger ones Like small rivulets flowing towards larger rivers He remembered how the streams from summits So vigorously come down with a gush Also the noisy cataracts somersaulting down, Leaving reverberating echoes all around But they produce only a soft musical sound As they join with the rivers and pass through plains And finally end in a kind of hushed stillness Just before merging with the sea! The old man philosophized; Life too, is like a river Fierce and ferocious when one is young Gentler and sedate after middle age And slow and sloppy in old age With this calm acceptance of the need to de accelerate Wrapping himself in the shawl against the growing cold He turned away from the window. Pushing his wheel chair, He moved forward, Knowing no haste….. Towards his bed for another night’s tired sleep!
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Feb 1, 2017
Feb 1, 2017 at 7:27 AM UTC
On a Wheelchair
i see myself - unshaven and distraught, at peace with who i am and despaired by a world i saw coming but couldn't prepare for. i see myself - sitting in the old house, civil war ghosts whispering through the cracks in the dry red clay. sherman burned this town once and now i get to watch the sun do it again. i see myself - the hedges are overgrown and i never stopped smoking cigarettes. the shadows on the walls are mapped out, a mimicry of life in an empty heirloom. i see myself - head in my hands thinking about history. The Last Gilded Age. The Second Gilded Age. what good are comparisons if no one's left to draw them? how does the past make room in a world already strangled by its present? i choke back - the same addiction that made geraldine shoot herself. it occurs to me that i am probably the last person alive to remember geraldine ever existed. i think that's what drew me to history - i've always had the past living inside me. there's a whole family tree intertwined with my ribcage, like kudzu over tarred lungs. i fill my - flask with weedkiller. i inherit an open wound. i try to find my place in a history that no one will ever read.
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May 4, 2021
May 4, 2021 at 2:15 AM UTC
the future of history
Time is an old story teller, he is all-knowing and all-seeing. An old diner that sits in the west under an illuminated open sign, holds the most twisted relationship there ever was. Black coffee sits in an old ***** white mug, false smiles highlight the masks of the two, pastries gather together on an ugly dish. Crumbs collect on their laps as they sit in their unhappiness. Her skirt rumpled, his jeans creased, her makeup smeared, his beard unshaven. His wandering eyes, her lips turned towards the table, their glumness leaves a distasteful air in the vacant restaurant. Together they sit alone, the rock clasped to her finger, a symbol of their struggle. The man shudders in the cold, stands up, and walks away. She does not follow. Her coffee has become ice cold. And yet the clock on the wall just keeps ticking.
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Sep 16, 2012
Sep 16, 2012 at 1:45 AM UTC
A Waste of Time