ilang oras pa ba ang dapat hintayin
para tanggapin ko'y wala ka na sa akin
tila parang sinaksak ng isang patalim
ang puso kong patuloy nagkikimkim

tinatago ang bawat pait
dinadama ang bawat sakit
inaalala ang bawat saya
umaasang ika'y babalik pa

bawat oras ika'y naiisip
ikaw parin hanggang sa panaginip

why am i still breathing?
why am i still alive?
why am i still here?
when my existence
caused more wrongs
than rights.

body shaking
lips trembling
slowly feeling numb
trying to hold it back

heart pounding
heavy breathing
fear creeping in
how long should i hold back

still hoping
but slowly wishing
i could let go
and not hold back

always wishing
i wasn't the one chasing
and now realizing
another tear fell from my eyes

a love that will last is what we thought
who would've thought it would end so soon
do you regret the days when we both thought
that our love would take us over the moon

for my days with you were not too long
i wouldn't mind living those days again
the love you gave was as sweet as a song
but the love I gave you were only thrown in the rain

darling, i don't regret anything with you
every day I still want to stay with you
even if it hurts me, I would still love you too
even if you don't want me to

if i ask you, do regret being with me too?
would you say no like you used to?
did you change your mind about me too?
because whatever happened, i didn't change my mind about you

i know I have to go on with my life
but can you hold me tight one last time?

a wise man once said,
"one of hardest and painful goodbyes are not the ones that are said. but the ones that have not yet been said and heard by your ears but you can already feel it in your heart. i still want to believe that if we're meant to be, we will be. maybe it would take weeks, months, years. but, i'll wait. if we see each other one day and you realize that you still love me, just remember that i still love you. because it is impossible for me to unlove you.

end me.

this is not poem about you and me
this is a poem only about me

i did not write this to let you go
i wrote it because i can't let go

really, this isn't a poem.

I'm scared of the monsters inside of me slowly creeping out.
I'm scared that these monsters are slowly consuming me.
I try to fight it. I really do.
Those monsters grew because of memories.
Bad memories that no one could erase. Memories that stay with me even if i want it to leave.
I can't forget. That's my flaw.
It's not that you did anything wrong to me now.
Because you didn't. You really didn't.
It's not because I haven't forgiven you. Don't think that.
Because the moment you apologized, I already did forgive you. And i would do it again.
I just can't forget everything.
Sometimes, i wish i could wake up with amnesia.
So i don't have to remember the bad.
Because it hurts. It still does.
And i can't express it enough.
I can't put it into words.
I want this to stop.
I want to stop the pain because it's slowly killing me.
I can't even sleep at night without crying.
I can't even close my eyes without imagining.
I can't. I can't let go of it, the memories they haunt me when i'm awake. They haunt me when i'm asleep. They haunt me when i'm with you. They haunt me when i'm not with you.
They follow me like shadows in the dark.
I hate it. I might lose it before it goes away.
I don't know.
I want it to be over.
When will it be over?

i hate him
but not as much

i hate her
but not as much

i hate them
but not as much

i hate you
but not as much

i hate everyone
but not as much as

I hate my demons.

unti unting nawawalan ng gana
pero heto ako, tuluyan pa ring umaasa
sa bawat umaga nating dalawa
hindi ko mapigilan na kumapit nalang sa bawat "sana"

kung bakit nagkaganito
hindi ko alam
ang sabi mo, mahal mo ako
pero bakit parang iniwan mo na ako?

hanggang kailan kaya ako maghihintay
kasi sabi mo'y ika'y babalik
pero sa bawat araw na nagdaan
parang nawawalan na ng halaga ang "walang hanggan"

don't leave, my love.  
i love you always.

i wish i knew
the very first time i laid my eyes on you
that love was too good to be true
for it to come between me and you

i wish i knew
the very first time i held hands with you
that those were the hands that i had to let go of
too soon.

You don't love me the most.
You don't love me on my bad days, you only love me on my good ones.
You don't love me when I feel sad, you only love me when I'm happy.
You don't love me when I'm suffering, you only love me when I'm comfortable. You don't love me when I need you, you only love me when you need me.
You don't love me when I'm crying, you only love me when I'm smiling.
You don't love me when I mess up, you only love me when I do things right.
You don't love me when I'm crazy, you only love me when I'm sane.
You don't love me, really.
I just feel you say that you do in times when it most benefits you.
I understand that you're tired. I am too. Most of the times, I try to keep a straight face so you won't see what I'm going through. I don't wanna be a burden.
I never want to be a responsibility you never wanted. I don't want to be that someone.
Don't love me anymore if you're only gonna love one side of me.
Don't love me if you can't accept the other parts of me which are not beautiful.
Don't love me if you're gonna push me away or turn your back away from me when I need you the most.
Just unlove me if ever this was love for you.
Unlove me so it would be easier to understand why I need to let you go too. Unlove me so that I won't love you anymore too.