Life is a battle, between Bad and Worse.
These eyes only see it two ways,
Not in reverse.
Pain this day,
Sorrow the next.
There is no winning option,
You choose which is best.
Your fate is sealed,
But all hope isn't lost.
Make your decision,
Or you'll pay the cost.
Just ask the question,
They'll whisper your answer.
The two will rejoice.
So don't be ungrateful,
Not many have this choice.
Just pull the trigger,
And you'll hear...
Your final voice.

Well, now that my life has turned from better, to worse, to the most amazing time I have ever had, I'd like to say a few things.

First off, I have nothing to say.
Second, I am happy. Don't ruin my mood.

I don't know what I did to make you so bitter, but it must have been worse than caring for you.

It must have been worse than putting you before anyone else,

It must have been worse than all those kind words I shared with you.

It must have been worse than kissing away your tears,
      When you thought that dark feeling inside you would never go away.

It must have been worse than trying to make you smile,  

Or telling you that your smile makes me smile.

It had to have been worse than caressing your face in the morning because
                 I loved you.

It must have been worse than all the times I was the big spoon.

It must have really been when your happiness was more important to me than my own.

Happily ever afters
They are fake story endings for me
Why not put the truth in it?
Cause in life there are never any happily ever afters
Even in my dreams there are never any happy endings
Life is no different
Life is a gamble
Where worse can get worse
Or better can get better
But most of the time
Worse gets worse
And better can't get better
*Life moves on even when you're dead

I watch my reflection in the mirror
with my pale blue eyes
watching my lifeless stature in the dark
bones made out of gelatin
and my heart out of fragile glass
that breaks everytime i see myself

My fingertops softly touch my face
Tears keep coming faster
till my waterlines are overflowing
My nails grow sharper
and my fingers cramp
digging holes under my eyes
I want to shatter my bones
And burn my skin to ashes
I want to rip the hair from my scalp
as well as all the pages
filled with frustration
scratching and screaming
I have to be pretty

but the need for it grows
as well as the demons inside my soul

I am not entirely happy
I am not entirely sad

                                                            ­                             I smile sometimes and
                                                             ­                            I laugh at funny things
                                                          ­                               I can crack a joke and
                                                                ­                         Be around people.

But at night when I am alone
Is when the thoughts start coming
When the tears escape my eyes
And when I start to feel the worse about myself.
This is the time when I just want to disappear.



(a.d)