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Britni Ann Feb 2019
I didn’t want this.
I didn’t want him to leave but he did.
I didn’t want her to break me but she did.
I didn’t want him to take advantage of me but he did.

What I wanted was a dad who would stay.
What I wanted was a friend who would be there for me no matter what.
What I wanted was a man I could trust to keep his hands away from me.  

I am afraid of getting my hopes up.
And yet I still feel saddened when people don’t come through.
I’m so tired of living in fear.
But my mind revolves around what ifs,
And memories,
And brokenness.
And what if, when I try to think differently, and I get my hopes up, it’s all for nothing? And I am left alone again?
I feel empty again
katie Jan 2019
Please don't tell him when I die
It will be too much to handle

We have had the same questions
But he won't get the answers

Please don't tell him when I die
He will think it's his fault

Like I'm his lone snail
And he is my salt

Though his actions were cruel
And rough to the touch

I care most for his wellbeing
I am not asking too much

Please don't tell him when I die
It is the secret to keep

You can take it to my grave
So I know he won't weep
a poem about about a former best friend who sexually assaulted me. This is about continuing to put their needs above your own when they never did the same. Also this was a very long time ago, I have since healed and moved on. I am not suicidal so please do not report.
joren's Jan 2019
I'm gonna crash
I'm switching lanes
Like a spinning fan
I osalate
And I'm in danger
I'm testing fate
My life in peril
There's no debate
My chance of survival
Obliterate
My chance is slim
And I am on
My last whim
I'm hanging by
A single limb
I'm bleeding out
I need a stim
Like a med pack
I need a chopper
For an evac
I need to run
And not look back
life in peril is about recognizing and identifying a negative state of mind and making a concious decision to escape it asap
Rowan S Jan 2019
It's been long enough now
And enough has been said
Apologies and forgiveness passed back and forth
Like folded middle school notes
Yet here I am

"Ouch, I just bit my cheek."

As I let my rods and cones
Intercept the
Lies and smoke
The electrons radiating from my
Squared, glowing palm

I sigh
And attempt to release stagnant regret
As my mouth fills with the taste
Of
Metal
"Whoops, I just hurt my own feelings."
Umi Jan 2019
Isn't making sense over so little irrational ?
Then again, with the constant change of life is there such a thing as being completely, or even partly rational to begin with ?
Perhaps not, all what is thought of it are social standards which in themselves differ from each culture in each country in a small world,
Those unlikely to advance are left in darkness all by themselves,
Rotting within the terror of their mind, shunned by interaction,
With the simple wish to be considered normal, to feel the way most of their many encounters of human beings do every single day,
As a result, they may further distance themselves and define each other as an inhuman, resented by life, losing the last light of hope,
Such is a cycle of despair, a downward spiral of lost emotions,
What does it take to enjoy just one more day, one more moment,
Before quitting it all the same, leaving without trace,
After all a demon like me has no place
In this beautiful world.

~ Umi
Masha Yurkevich Jan 2019
I want to say
'I love you'
but I'm afraid
of what you'll think.
Will you
just sit there
and look at me
and blink?
Will you smile
and hug me
and tell that
you love me too.
What you'll think,
I don't know.
But I love you,
and that's something  
that I think
you should know.
Unsure of how to say it...
Solomon Jan 2019
When you hug someone a little too hard,
They would suffocate.
S K Anderson Jan 2019
COLLAB. WITH AUSTIN DRAPER

It’s little more than a quiet thought.
The impending feeling that the loneliness
was a creation of my own imploding self-conscious.
I wouldn’t have hurt you voluntarily,
so what outside force could know my mind so well?

It’s little more than a spoken word.
The rumble of the oncoming storm could be felt
from as close as 1.6 miles away,
where the darkness of your room invaded the
not-so secret spots of your heart.

I’m prone, to the truth in your words.
I’m not used to the idea of confronting my thoughts
And sorting them out to you.
Is it that I spoke wrong words? Or I stopped before they meant anything?
You mean so much, and now you are out of my reach.
I did the first two stanzas and Austin did the third. I really like it, it's the first poetry collaboration I've done.
***
I just need to be more creative
Have one thought that clicks in everybody's mind
Something  that makes me more special than the rest;
Something that inspires,
That requires those who read it to sit and ponder.
A stir in the air that shipwrecks your mind
On the island of my imagination.
I just need something more.

But what for?
The clicks and the views,
The stars in the night sky
Or the "i love you" (s)
O' nothing that really matters anymore
Writing at a time when i should be asleep, probably going to wake up to this trash
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