there are just times
when waking up
gets very hard
when getting up on your bed
seems like it would take
all your energy
and willpower to do
sometimes you won't feel
the need to eat
even if you haven't eaten
since the night before
when your eyes land to the windows
there will be times
where you'll find the sunrise
not so pretty
or you'll find the stars
not appealing
there will be a period
where nothing makes you smile
and everything is just
off
but let me assure you
when things get hard
i'll help you
when you're struggling
i'll struggle with you
when you're in your downfall
i'll stay with you
i'll wake you up
on those mornings you can't
i'll help you get back up again
whether in that bed
or in the feeling you feel trapped onto
i'll be your sunrise
for the days not bright enough
or your moon
for the nights you wished to forget
even if you just don't want to talk
we'll enjoy the silence together
i'll do anything
because i've waited
for someone like you
for so long
i'm willing to bet
everything i have
just to keep you here
just to keep you near
because you,
you're all i asked for.

In Georgia, it is 82 degrees.
Sweltering sticky heat and air so thick with humidity
It’s like you’re swimming through syrup
Weigh me down.
Sweat slips down my spine like living water, a reminder that
I am here— uncomfortable, yes, but not quite hurting.
People smile. I smile back.

In New York, it’s 39 degrees.
Wind whips at my face, rendering my cheeks rosy and stinging my eyes with tears.
My teeth chatter, rattling my whole jaw with them.
The subtle pain reminds me I’m alive.
I’m not quite sure when I decided pain and existence were synonymous
But I did
And today is another reminder.
I smile. No one smiles back.

At least they’re alive. At least I am.

What was warranted could not be
more out of lingering fingers reach,
but vainly was the goal still paused upon,
teased with the view of what each wanted.


But stagnant were there endeavours
                                  for but a centimetre,
a vastness that could not be gauged by touch
                                                 yet palms were placed.

An innuendo of what could be but was not,
there love was undeniable but their reality
                     was a vacant space in their hearts.

And they sat back to back on this
                                      immovable obstacle,
mourning the need to be in the grasp of another.

No tears were shown to the other but in solace
they fell like monsoons on the ground,
all emotions were departed from there clouds
of white that blinked upon time and then stopped.

They never gave up on the motions that stirred
within and even though time
is finite and what was unforgiving
                               in there needing was no longer.

But time is no friend to love, and bones were
all that was evidence of what once was.
Gazing with empty sockets eternally
                                                     gazing on the other.

But where that which kept them apart had now
                                            parted hands of white,  
now clasped within each others touching.

For an eternity where in the echoes of the past
which could not be obtained
                                  was now holding on in death.

Vacant puddles stare into each other
          and where there was two singular
now they are silently holding on to each other.

And when he opened  the word, written:
it said that God would give him
   the greatest gift--

which was God, himself

And immediately he succumbed,  to the pressure
of Love's great purge

Bringing to the world;  all,
       the greatest gift  of all--

                   his own demise

I closed my eyes
And you were on my mind again
My lips on yours
Your tongue in my mouth
Heat between us
My hand in your hair
Yours all over me
I open my eyes and I’m driving
Down the backroads
I shouldn’t be so deep in thought
But when my mind is full
All roads seem to lead back to you
Or If I’m mad or feeling blue
Even in my seething rage
Or when my heart begins to race
You put a smile on my face
I’ve never met anyone who can bring me back
From the throes of a panic attack
With a laugh and a smile
Please stick around a while
You do things to me
The way our bodies move
When we are alone together
And all I want in that moment
Is you
Inside of me
And I close my eyes..
Your lips on mine
One more time

If I stitch my heart on top of yours,
The tattered pieces
Will cover the other's holes.
I promise to keep you warm.
I promise you are safe here.

You and me,
Our love deep as the sea,
Together,
Forever.
Hold my hand my gentle dove,
As we traverse life's journey with love,
Living, laughing and loving,
Every moment just devouring.
Enjoying the taste of ripe mangoes,
The tender maize and cassava as we go,
Feel the taste of salty air,
Us, a fine pair.
And as our steps slow and dither,
Our eyesight get dimmer,
Your hand always in mine,
We'll be fine,
Together,
Me and you forever.
1/2/2020

But,
your "together"
was only
"to get her" ,
nothing more.


Love was not present on that relationship that she once had.

Awkward at best,
but you didn’t seem to care.
I could fall and stumble,
and you’d be right there.
No questions asked.
Anytime light or dark.
And each time we hugged a warmth filled me that even my IQ couldn’t explain.
When I was faced with the dark,
you were the first to come running.
And when you were down,
I never hesitated.
Like clockwork we were two in the same.
But you found another,
and the stars never quite aligned with the stars in our eyes.  
We weren’t meant to be.
Sad,
but true.
And though we can’t be one,
we’ll always be two.
There when the going gets tough,
and forever as close as the universe will allow.
You have my back,
and I’ve got yours.