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kailee Mar 2020
i still think of you often
whether im with people or by myself
i think about the way you touched me
the way your warm pink lips felt against my collarbone

then i thought about what actually happened

i dont think of you often
neither by myself or with people
i think about the way you hit me
the way your warm pink lips sputtered those words

i hope i never think of you

3 Aug 2019
you relinquished your chains.
i didn't realize the alloy
turned your wrists green
and soured the feeling.

    i didn't realize you viewed them
    as shackles, and not the comfort
    endowed to you when i vowed
    to protect you just two months ago.

    i don't blame you.
        no, i can't. delicate birds
    don't like the clanking of cages,
        no matter how intricate
    the bars are constructed, and
how beautiful
the permanence
of a lock is
yes, these words can stop here

(you take the life out of me every time you speak)
3 Aug 2019
this feeling is not
symbiotic: you reduce
my core to nothing
at least i am something (ashes) and at least you are happy
i am molded symbiose!
m.b.d forever
3 Aug 2019
i worship an empty god
who answers no prayers.

a mono-disciple tapered
to heavenly threads without
ever bearing wings of my own,

i have no convictions except
the idle ones he tethers me with:
our shrine is gold and red.
(sometimes i think it is pretty.)

i will follow him with blind eyes,
for there is nothing more sweet
than to be loved for merely existing
and reciting his gospel to the ground.

i grow under his sunlight.
he waters me as he pleases,
but my petals will never be
the colors of the church flowers
from his childhood,
(he doesn't realize they are fable.)

my mind will never be his steeple.
Nazareth needs repairing, but
scripture ordains i cannot bear
the burden of fixing something so bloodied and broken.

i will bleed red wine for him,
i have no doubt he will finish
the glass.

it stains the page. i smile,
yellowed crumpling page.

i write the next verse, in pencil,
heeding my perpetual mistake:

          i am immeasurably incorrect,
          and no one needs repentance but
          the sinner, who is I tonight,
          and all nights.

i close the
        book. i lay down.

  is dark.

so i pray my
bedtime prayer,
that i wish
my god wakes up
with a clearer mind
and a learned heart

(a fool is a follower,
a fool is the man who
absolves the snake for the sin
and punishes Himself
for not seeing clearer.)
it was easier when god was the only problem
A Simillacrum May 2019
Philip K. What The ****.
It's here. Has been. In a fad.
I sit in a slit.

The calm of industrial evenings.
Back to the industry?
I never left.

You get clean. I get stuck.
Not that I never did want.
Cracks exist in everything.
Brief gaps in taken space.

Every crack leads from toe to head.
Every crack feeds on dusty crumbs.
Go Getter
m X c May 2019
gabing hindi mapakali,
gustong humagolgol, ngunit walang luhang pumapatak,
sikip ng dibdib ay hindi maintindihan,
ilang kilometro na ang takbo ng isip,
ngunit ikaw lamang ang iniisip,
Papalayain na ba ang sarili?
o hahayaan nalang na magkusang mawala,
dahil nagmimistulang bangkay na at hindi na maramdaman ang muling umibig.
ang makita kang masaya na, ay akin ding kasiyahan,
mga katanungan ko'y hangang tanong nalang.
sinusubukang ngumiti tumawa ngunit, aking lamang pinaglalaruan ang aking sarili, dahil sa halip tuwa at saya ang aking maramdaman ay parang normal lang.
sa nakaraan nating ako lang ang nakakalam, na parang ako lang ang nakakaalala.
ito na nakakaramdam na pala ako ulit.
SAKIT pala ang aking nararamdaman, na ako'y napag iwanan na, na ako nalang ang nabubuhay sating nakaraan. TAKOT, na ako'y tuluyan mo na palang nakalimutan, TUWA na ikaw ay masayang masaya na, ngunit sana ang mga tanong gustong itanong saiyo, matuldukan na, pangamba ko lang ay hindi nanaman ito sagutin. pangamba ko din ay baka hindi mo na ako ituring na kahit parang kapatid lang, yon ay aking tanging hiling.
ngayon ay siguro panahon na para,
Palayain na aking SARILI,
ngayon luha na ngay bumuhos sa umagang gansa ng sikat ng araw,
at ngayon sa huling pagkakataon ipapadama sayo,
K. ikaw lang, mahal kita, minahal kita, at kung baliktarin man ang mundo at kung saan pwede na ang TAYO, K. mamahalain parin kita.
mahirap man sakin ngunit siguro ngay ito rin ang iyong inaantay ang,
Palayain na aking SARILI.
there's always someone who will never be YOURS, iloveyou more than anyone knows.
thanks, and i will always be your MACy.
A Simillacrum May 2019
I have no perspective, I
bring nothing new.
I absorb everything, I
am pressed to consume.

I consume. They press me,
to consume me, to imbibe,
to savor the flavor of
the fruits to their labor.

I'm impressed you haven't
yet guessed my game correctly.
(. . .rebranding. . .)
I'm impressed you haven't
yet guessed my game.

If I'm alive, then we're ******.
If I die, then you're ******.
Die. Die. Die. Die. Die. Die. Die.
Ruth Apr 2019
People thinks she is mean,
Some say she is hard,
But they just don’t know what it means
To be treated bad by the guy she trusted hard.

People say she have the heart of stone.
But they just don’t understand
She has to put her heart lock because
He doesn’t use his heart but use his Hand

She let go of her past and start something new
Became strong and fearless
But something blew
The fate been ruthless

The guy return to win her
But little did he know she is all New.
He buys ring for her and
Introduce her to all crew

But he still the same, full of promises less of action
Full of adjectives but less of verbs
He thinks he’s some kind of Prince Charming in some animation
That either make her day or leave her aching for days.

The queen doesn’t need a king
Let her reign the castle
And see how she nailed that thing
Without any hustle ;)

The so called “prince” left her
But she remain strong,
The charm he gave does not feed her
She took a hit through a ****
And realize where she truly Belongs

The girl that used to be beaten up by manipulations
Is now a Woman without fears
She deserved recognitions because
She learn to stand for herself without any gears!
This poem is for this girl, who’ve been into a rough time with her past. Wishing that she can find someone that will love her more than anything, because she deserves it
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