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Alek Mielnikow May 2020
Downtown’s sodium orange
penetrates the snow fog around us,
and the xenon sign outside this club
stains your teeth an electric blue.

There are bloodshot eyes behind puffs
of smoke as you **** on a cigarette.

Our feet ***** the salt and butts
under the slush as snow coats our
coats and your short, curly hair.

Your lips lap the tip for mere seconds
at a time, never leaving your lungs
full for long. I watch your chest rise
and fall with each burning breath
and imagine that coat curling away
and falling like ash. But I don’t smoke
and loathe the smell that lingers
betwixt my fingers.


-
by Aleksander Mielnikow | Alek the Poet
Did you know most streetlights are high pressured sodium lamps?

And yes, even with all my self-destructive behavior like binge eating, physical self-injury/self-harm, and several suicide attempts, I don't actually smoke. I tried a bit, and though I never minded the taste or smell in my mouth, I could never stand the smell it left on my fingers. So no more, except for the countless times I'm with friends in smoking areas inhaling 2nd hand.

I've mostly stopped drinking too ("mostly" because I'm still willing to sip to test taste), but that's a whole other story to turn into a lust filled poem 😄

If you liked this piece, check out my profile for older works.
Arthur Habsburg Apr 2020
All my poems are
Wet, stinky, and brown.
Last night was wild,
And I mean it
It was proper uncivilised,
Things were said that were stupid
Lies celebrated
And truth passed around like a *****,
It started slowly:
Smoking around strangers
Starting a conversation
With my beer –
she’s always so glad to see me
she makes me feel so special
like I’ve actually got something to say
More strangers come in
I think I’m overdressed
They’re all wearing sneakers & T-shirts
Advertising one thing or the next
In their eyes I must be a commercial for something too
Something silly, no doubt
Look, we can help each other
Let’s have a drink
What’s your name
I like football too
No, I don’t care about teams ..
Okay, I need a ***,
It started slowly:
One then another drink
Lifting our heads out of the infinite bed of boredom
Let’s see, let’s play
It’s dark enough to get personal
If only we knew how
Another track of dominoes to hear & say
I wish I knew some fascists
Agreeing is so dull & unproductive
Don’t you agree?
Oh, you need a ***
That’s fine, I could use a smoke
Maybe talk to some women
But they’re all so mad at men these days
I’ll have to wear a disguise
What could I be?
A lion
Or a peacock
Or maybe an orangutan?
Perhaps then they will tell me
Why they have consciously surrendered the greatest power they have over men
Was it disgust and disappointment
Or pure prophetic wisdom
Or solidarity with those less powerful among their kind?
I think of Angela Merkel and I am confused
I need help
I need serious help
At the bar
A shot & a long drink
A shot & a long drink
I accidentally catch my reflection in the mirror behind all those bottles and I don’t know who I am
I have a peacocks tail
Lion’s *****
And the face of an orangutan
And I’m starting to smell like a man
A shot & a long drink
A shot & a long drink
To cover it all
Let’s have a ball!
Embrace a lack of sense
Lemme buy you a drink
Tell me about yourself,
I’ll keep quiet, I’m interested
Wow, now that’s a story I’ve never heard before
I should write a book about you
Or a poem if tonight we happen to sleep together
It’s up to you, I don’t mind
We all do as we please
Until it pleases us to surrender,
It’s late, you say
I take it the wrong way and go for a ***
When I come back
I go for a smoke instead
And when I look for you
I forget your face
So I end up reading my poems to whoever listens
Which works just as well
Or badly
I’m using my drink as an ashtray
And then when I turn another page
I spill it all over my texts
Now all my poems are wet, stinky & brown
That’s how I find them in the morning
Stuffed into my pants,
I’ll take the pants to the laundry
Maybe they’ll come out clear & dry
And smelling of pomegranate.
Tsunami Apr 2020
A half burnt smoke never tastes the same
As an un-lit cigarette.
It’s the same with love.

We can never tumble back in time to;
Happy nights nuzzling in bed,
Clandestine kisses on the dock at midnight,
Drinking in glorious sunsets and city lights.
As if we could ever pretend that the world was perfect.

We can never dance back into;
Long car rides to Victoria,
Drunk laughs in the rain,
Late night cuddles on the couch
Playing video games to our hearts content.

In all honesty, I don’t need to live in the past
I like smoking full cigarettes to make them last.
u put ur heartbreak into one
Ksh Mar 2020
Empty streets, flickering lights
Not a soul in sight in the darkness of the night.
No fevered whispers, no drunken gait,
No flirty couples, no late-night deadlines.

The streets are devoid of life,
And yet you can't say it's dead.

People are living, breathing, sleeping,
under different roofs, in different rooms,
in varying states of ecstacy and misery and outright boredom.
In endless creativity and stuttering breaths,
witness the arousal and the ebb and flow of time
without so much as a second thought
to anyone outside the realm of safety and peace
within the four corners of their reality.

With each inhale, there is life.
Why can't we say that each exhale brings death?

For what is death if not simply as the absence of life?
When the glimmer in his eyes fades, when the smile you long for
doesn't appear, when you reach for his hand and find nothing but air--

Life.
It's empty.
Life.
It's meaningless.

I don't feel alive without you.
Yet I don't feel like I'm dead, either.

And so here I am, in a weird limbo that is just pain, pain, pain--
The pain of each inhale not bringing me what life is supposed to be
as described in picturesque scenes from tiny little windows.
The disappointment of every exhale that brings no end to this emptiness, this chasm of nothing in my chest that you once filled.

Empty streets, like veins that pump blood that refuse to sing.
Flickering lights, from my lighter that spouses one last, dying flame.
No fevered whispers, no drunken gait.
No love, no adrenaline.
Nothing.
Carlo C Gomez Mar 2020
A friend of the Man of Steel,
Lois Lane was full of questions
about identity and the way Niagara Falls,
which Clark Kent was poorly denying.

The life of this reporter
was then full of punch-ups
and helicopter rides gone awry;
strange musings in her head
and fancy flights in the sky;
vacations consumed climbing the Eiffel Tower
and making love in an odd
fluffy bean bag bed.

But she loved the smokes so much more,
she ****** those coffin nails
faster than a speeding bullet.
More powerful than a locomotive,
she puffed away, leaving
Superman’s love in the ashtray.

Our poor hero's heart might have ached
but he still could leap
tall buildings in a single bound.
Lois, on the other hand, was a chainsmoker
and her teeth always brown.

It doesn't take x-ray vision to see
this chimney sweep was
no prize or pageant beauty.
And dare it be said, in true hindsight,
she was even worse for him than Kryptonite.
N Jul 2019
Until dawn,
a cigarette ash
flew into her right eye

The cigarette remained alight
despite the flood of tears
streaming down her cheeks  

With such a hell
blazing inside her,
she put out fire with smoke

Solitude was her
only consolation,
and all she longed for

There is not a soul
that she yearns for,
but for hers to burn out
dylan Mar 2020
Honey,
just
like
this
cigarette
between
MY
lips.
YOU
were
cheap,
dangerous
and
did
not
last
very
long.
Baby,
just
like
the
cigarette
between
YOUR
lips.
YOU
threw
ME
away
once
I
filled
YOU
up.
I KNEW YOU WOULD THROW ME AWAY.
Kim Elaydo Feb 2020
sober decisions
no proper thought

sweet amber lights
deathly black ash

nicotine rush
the world is spinning

a fleeting high
a wave of dizziness

missed calls
unanswered messages

an innate desire to self destruct
an unconscious want to be appreciated

low blows and insecurities
anger unexpressed

a dangerous game in wet pavements
under orange lights and judging eyes

3 sticks consumed quickly
no regrets; but a thousand sorrows
Mia Kay James Feb 2020
I don't know what's
more difficult-
trying to
quit smoking
or
learning to love
myself.
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