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It is as if a wave of tranquility passed over me this morning. Still numb. However, the strenuous longing to feel has dissipated. The wounds have be temporarily cauterized. No empty pain lingers in the darkness like a phantom menace. I felt nothing before, But I knew I was in pain. Now the nothingness consumes any lingering obscure thoughts. I am the hollow man; Such a fragile shell I carry on burden bones. But tis a pleasant day indeed. Thunder storms barrage the sky in open warfare and ominous tear drops soak the battlefield. For once I am not the fool weeping alone; The world takes my place, my pain, my suffering, and I revel in the warmth of it's tears as any good sadist does.
Poetic pros I write in my journal that I reveal to the world in snippets.
The past two days were recklessly engorged with alcohol.
Intoxication has become habitual. Each weekend, drowning one's self in an illusion of joy and folly; The jester entertaining not Kings nor Queens, but the ****, the weak, to deceive the empty crowd in my mind that I matter to someone. But matter is fleeting and we, myself and the abyss, understand the plight of today; waking up to nothing-- the empty abyss for which I am well acquainted with. Simply put, I am revisiting my old home from a not so distant past. The only difference between then and now is the relentless bottoms of empty glasses and a false sense of security and composure.
1 page of my thoughts a day to prevent my head from exploding!
Grey Mar 2020
I lie awake in my bed
all these uncontained thoughts
running around in my head.
Color and light,
ideas that are glaring and bright
seep into my head during the long nights.
But I'm restless, dark thoughts
pulling me down
and making me breathless.
So I take a sleeping pill,
wait for it to lift the weight
of the desperate dreams they ****.
But along with it,
the rainbow dims and flickers,
becoming a monochrome
that reminds me all to much
of the world we call home.
Going through my drafts.
I'm never sure how to end my poems, so I'm never really satisfied with them.
M e l l o Nov 2019
there's this pattern
that I keep on going circles at
for everything I gained
I lost something in return
but I guess
I just never understand
which losses were worth losing
and which gains were worth acquiring
nov. 5
julianna Oct 2018
What’s wrong with me?
When it came to dealing with others,
I never saw myself in a negative way.
But now, all I notice
is my pessimistic nature.
Do the cons always outweigh the pros?
No, of course not,
but lately I remember more bad things than good.
I’m constantly learning and bettering myself. It’s frustrating at times because no one has all the answers, but at the end of the day progress is progress.
Lyn-Purcell Aug 2018
~ ♡ ~
It's pleasure
~ ♡ ~
It's  pain
~ ♡ ~
It's  joy
~ ♡ ~
It's disquiet
~ ♡ ~
It's an antidote
~ ♡ ~
It's poison
~ ♡ ~
It's soundness
~ ♡ ~
It's madness
~ ♡ ~
It's a blessing
~ ♡ ~
It's a curse
~ ♡ ~
It's a haven
~ ♡ ~
It's a battle
~ ♡ ~
But above all,
Real love, true love
is sacrifice
~ ♡ ~
Love has so many pros and cons, it does good and it harms.
Nowadays love, real love, is not valued when people make sacrifices for others...
Makes me kinda sad. I know no man is perfect, at some point we all take advantage. We all have our ungrateful moments. But now, I see the important of love and how it's not only about giving, it's also about giving something up; size is irrelevant.
Appreciate what your loved ones do for you.
Appreciate what they give up for you.
Be back soon!
Lyn ***
There's instant soup
Instant milk
Blogs full'a goop
Bugs in your blink

Instant coffee
Love like toffee
Stuck in your spam

Instant high
Instant fluff
Wherever you look
There's bang for your buck

God forbid
Delete it all
Switch it off
Feel the mad withdrawal

And go back to the land
Grow your own
Get a cow or a goat
Forget your phone

Finish the weeding
Chat with a rose
Stand in a summer shower
Smell the smells in your nose

Listen to the night
Owls, foxes, wrens
Watch the slow boiling
Smoke dancing in little rings
Natural world order versus techno world disorder
the ******* up brigade
the ******* up brigade
the ******* up brigade
the ******* up brigade
the ******* up brigade
the ******* up brigade
the ******* up brigade
the ******* up brigade
the ******* up brigade
the ******* up brigade
the ******* up brigade
the ******* up brigade
Aron Mar 2016
I find it scary
to love someone like this.
You give everything you have
your love, time & attention.
Hoping that
they will do & feel
the same way
like you do.

Missing them every single time,
making sure that they're happy &
remain contented with you,
& your love.
Doing everything that you could
to make sure that
they wouldn't leave you,

At the same time,
giving them
space & freedom
that they want & deserve.
To make sure
they won't
feel locked, stuck & chained
with you.

Loving someone
so deeply, pure, sincere
& innocent
is not an easy task.
This might sound
I admire
myself & those
who has done it?

It is scary, yes.
No assurances
that all of it wouldn't be wasted.
Maybe that's the beauty of love
Making smart & logical people;
dumb, fearless & illogical.
Driving human beings,
insane &
risking it all,
for the name of
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