I am entropy again
and it’s not the same.
My energy is falling daily,
things look dark, ouch,
I’m all over these days. Umbral
shadows dashing yet slowing my ways. Luminous
photons, in my eyes, positive, but accelerating
away so negative. Fingernails, chewed.
Random urges to *****, tasting for a pink hue.
If it’s a cool night, with my pills I’ll get physical.
Eyes on the inside bruised black and blue.
Confidence approaching zero, thirsty,
I’m feeling for clear shots.
Mind is dazed, I taste the craze, and can barely rhyme.
I’m all over myself, so I’m on nothing when I see
her creep out sometimes, taking my space
blocking the Sun. I’m sad, tempest-tossed,
old shades arise when she appears;
hurt, jealousy, anger whispering.
I cry from the inside, burning tears.
I’m locked within myself once more.
Who am I? Lost but not found.
I can’t take this any longer.
Why does she pick so late
to pixelate in my mind?
She lives as I die. I beg for mercy!
Frightening, so ******* frightening,
my happiness isn’t conserved, but why?
Hopes, laughs, peace, joy, love;
broken, tears, death, fury, darkness.
I can’t survive with this mentality,
I testify I can’t touch the sky.
Do they ever truly leave us alone?
She flies over my head,
please help me. Why?

I'm gonna crash
I'm switching lanes
Like a spinning fan
I osalate
And I'm in danger
I'm testing fate
My life in peril
There's no debate
My chance of survival
Obliterate
My chance is slim
And I am on
My last whim
I'm hanging by
A single limb
I'm bleeding out
I need a stim
Like a med pack
I need a chopper
For an evac
I need to run
And not look back

The teary rain could not hold back, nor
Hold in the torrent of tears
Just as the sound of the sea roaring
He wept

Enmeshed in the ever so scary black clouds
Imagining life beneath the earth
He raged on without mercy
Outpouring, crying, with no reservation;

In his rage, he looks on
To see small; little rather, creatures
Running helter skelter,
An evil grimace sits on his face
As he sends terror on Mankind

Rain;
In his glory
Peril awaits, dooms days, no mercy

somewhere in there
sounds like a kid
searching for another permuta-
tion of himself, some
semblance of a would-be he won’t hate.
that’s me, I’ll never run out of pain.
this genteel ache,
this conclusion, has nothing to do with choice.
there are some who’re born broken,
those unobtrusives with chapped lips, glancing up for
drones that might pick them up
then throw them to another Earth,
those who like getting into strangers’ cars, laying their head on the
dashboard that’s softer than their bed.
they on cold nights like to whisper to God: ‘we
don’t like this experiment.’ we are more
than warning signs of civilization in peril.
dead and gone.
don’t refuse exploitation; that’s how we still feel useful.
don’t the characters in some books make rooves out of leaves? too
dogged to prioritize shelter, though. too
drugged to maintain another thing
doomed to crack and crumble. just never enough time.
days flow by like silk into a sawmill. In the
dark we try to see if we still stand on strong ground, or surface tension.

such is
the rhythm. feet damp with cakemud. in
darkness we see stoplights turn red, sometimes yellow.