Stuck.
Nothing.
Nada.
Zilch.
Zero.

(i'll tell you a truth if you come real close)

I've run out of ideas.
my mind does not work

From the Order. Logic. Brains.
The. Sanctuary. Of. Day. To. Day. Life.

to something that is all
asdfghjlmtrvscex;nszgxkla
and
idon'tevenknowhowi'mformingthis­sentencerightnow
itdoesn'tevenmakesense

In truth, this isn't really a poem.
Just the ramblings of a crazy girl

whosjustadmittedthetruth

We are not just order in the disorder;
We are order fighting
for not being
disorder.

Order breathing.
order eating order.
order fighting
ord er cryi n g
o rde r la ugh in g
   or de r  l o v i n g
  
  o r der  di str ess e     d  
b  yt h e  f a c  t
a l    l
o  rd e   r
e ven   t  ual    ly
be co m                         es
di           s  or        d  er

"Life is meaningless," I was once told.
So I ripped the wing off a butterfly,
And watched as it twirled.
Now this old ape waits alone in the cold,
For I ripped the wing off a butterfly,
And have destroyed the world.

Obey the law, the law of man,
For it's all that makes us divine.
Obey the law, the law of God,
For it gives society spine.
Obey the laws you make yourself,
Or your soul will weigh thousands of tons.
Obey the law imposed on you,
Or be killed by your neighbors with guns.

The two gates are open me
Normality, and chaos
I know my feathers well
Shifting between colours
My eyes hide guile. I slide
Between worlds, intuiting social rules.
I am not proud or humble
Except for when one suits me
For normality requires a yoke
And it important to find one
At your size. And chaos,
Is just that, chaos
Unbound, the ultimate hubris
Of an individual, creative will
Which, like slender candle
Scorches itself to nothing
Out, out, burn, burn
Leaving only a pile
Of melted wax it calls art.

So do not
Fear your dual
Nature and be
Not trapped in
One or the
Other. Cross bridges
Of darkness and
Cleave to light.
There is no
Truth in this
Cosmos but that
Of ‘all thing
Are’ and no
More.

The moment you depart
from the stagnant, terrifying pole
I can see it through the glassy eyes
that you picked up the shards,
and shades of all the energy in us
before putting it on the plane
oh sweet soul, sweet untold
but I can feel it, and you can't hold it.

You are the embodiment of truth
a destroyer of corroborated lies
the sun slips away, oh you make it stays
everything in place, oh sunny side days
I am amazed at how far I've went
without having you at the other end
you put the meaning in Ying Yang
gone are the days of firing blank.

The age of understatement passed
horizon hangs from dawn till dusk
enthusiasm for the solitary odeum
helianthus laid at the mausoleum
you killed the ever-present sadness
and the endless parallel to happiness,
the tomb has finally been breached
I'm dumbfounded, bewitched.

You right the wronged in me,
and the spectrum burst into something
unlike the Pandora's box
Magna Carta suffered, and love
is all that I've ever heard.

If you every try to bring chaos
To the top of my tower, I will ****
You with everything I've got
For no one can stop me but
let me remind you for I am serious
If you try to challenge me just coz you're curious
Stop now, for I can ****
I have killed
and still I will
if you try to bring chaos to the top of my tower

I will bring out my power
To bring back the order

Are we acting within the laws of Thermodynamics?
Is this why the forests are felled
and the earth scoured for its ore?
We can not act randomly against the stochastic forces of nature.

Our agency has facilitated the beginning of the end,
fewer and fewer possibilities present themselves
and we're closing the doors to our future
before we ever knew of their existences

Beyond the imprints in my skin
Redemption has tried to
Encompass my hands and hold them tightly
Across these urges that attempt to pain my smile and
Kiss the lids of my eyes.

For I have not found
Room to grow just yet,
Only making such a fickle
Mockery of my former self.

Why do these
Hands no longer feel
Anything-
They just tuck away the memories.

Beyond this smile
Repression holds me again
Often times the only thing
Keeping this mind sane
Etches a mark onto a page

Yielding what I need for recovery
Only to leave me back to one
Universal truth, to break from what broke you.