I stopped bragging about my vices when
you reminded me that I existed before my addictions.

I stopped blaming love for knowing me falsely when I realized that I had never really met it before.

I realized that my obsessions ran shallow because I thought that it would be hard to quit them,
but it was harder to hold back
eternity;
the infinite moments that I felt
had existed
before I did.

As though the love I have for you was
pre-
determined
pre-
ordained
pre-
ternaturally formed.

As if the way I had organized my messy human emotions into neat little
boxes
   &
lines
had all been an errand to occupy my mind.

Before I loved you-
I loved escaping.

Any window
or stairway
or back-alley-path

that I could shimmy-down sideways
and avoid
things like

small talk
or
free verse
or
early mornings,

were the lanes I would dwell in,
hide in,
reside in.

But when I'm with you-
and when I'm without you-
(because now you permeate everything I do)
everything that I do is tinged with you;
Your colour
Your contrast
Your pigment
Your hue.

As if you are a light ray that I can now see,
my spectrum has gained the most beautiful wave.

And in this ultraviolet light,
the

small talk
and
free verse
and
early mornings

are sort of
breathtaking.

I say sort of, because while I gasp, you give me air.

And how can I choke when my heart's already gone?

When my skin is electric and my soul is
on fire

like some sort of creature that's been born from the flames.

And everything I thought that I needed
has now been
erased
and
replaced
and
preceded

by this uncontrollable urge
to eat you
alive
to have you
inside
to *** when
you die.

And this monster that you've made of me is hungry
and *****
and cannot concentrate on anything but
you

And I swear to God
or the grave
(and really, they're the same)
that if I love you any more
I will be ruptured in two
which would leave me a quarter of a person
because I'm only whole when I'm with you.

Like the four-legged beings that Zeus ripped apart-

I've searched for you always
I've searched for your heart.

Why sing for someone who despises your voice?
Why choose him who'll never respect your choice?
Why not give up after the many times you've tried him?'
Why not forget him,and be my Triduum?
Why waste the flooding love in your soul?
Why can't you see he was just a hard fall?
For all the caution from your peers through the years
Why won't you let a gentleman wipe your tears?
Why can't you accept that fighting for him is a lost cause?
Why do you choose to crash on his waves over a new course?
You say you can't free yourself from the heavy chains of Love
Why don't you believe It's something you can be free of?
Why can't you feel the concern in my heart beat?
Why not settle in my shade and let go the heat?

Anxious,
It's new, it's vibrant,
It's so me!
Must have it.

Anxious,
It's cheap, it's art,
Won't fit!
Can't have it.

Anxiety born of greed,
Selfishness, social need.
Not one or two but all!
A bag, a coat, some plaid!

Obsessed beyond capability
Want all over budget,
"It's human nature!"
It's a sickness
A disease, born of riches.
Tired of wishes.

Photos, bookmarks,
Catalogues, webstores.
I am a victim.

Victim of need
Obsessive wish lists
To compensate
For a lack of attention with years
To go back.

-Kathia M. Landeros

Too sentimental
Too much thought

Two hearts

To love eachother

Like I'm mental
Like how I obsess over that t-shirt I bought

Painted together like fine arts

I'll water it and let it grow, and I'll water you with kisses that smother.

i have gone madly obsessed with you
it's like i'm blindfolded
i can't see the outside world
it's all just you in this head of mine
you consume my thoughts, heart, and soul

he smiles to create the world's golden happiness
his laughter opens the confused, rainy skies
he's the one to love more than the heavy drops in the ocean
he looks with heart-felt eyes as deep as the hidden valleys below his feet
he lives to change the clashing towns surrounding
his love eases wars stirring about in the distance
he amazes my personal beliefs repeatedly
for this world he lives for
happens to be me

your smile holds a summer days sunshine
and laughter that shakes the autumn leaves to the ground
for so much love was held in watching the corners of your lips curl
your lips kiss the air, unworthy to caress such treasures
such being without flaw stood in distance to smell one's minted breath
your eyes held a gaze meant only for angels
yet there you stood pondering every aspect of my ****** features
analyzing as if I was a priceless article in an art museum
your lips curled once again simultaneously
your words and action were not created for people as I
yet there you stand
breathing the same earthy air into our lungs
seeing the same vivid colors now going blurry around me
as I fell harder, you were only there to catch me
and the world will never be the same
or at least without daily witness of your lips curling
in essence to show your happiness
an emotion engraved permanently into my mind
as if this moment is everlasting

"that's an obsession"
oh no it's a lesson
why is my past time
innocently pondering about what you are probably doing?
oh no. it's an obsession

I said I'd write a story about you
"just to get it over with"
and now I'm write hundreds of letters
i should rather think of getting better
Than sitting around waiting for you to come around

It should've settled in my head that you may not
or on second thought
maybe this is just the obsession

For though you are gone
You have lived as an idea in my head
An ideal
Quite surreal

I hate to say this,
But I'm obsessed.