The shadows creep into the corners of my vision
Cave in and surround me
as I let out a silent scream,
a final plea for the help I know I will never receive.
I bury myself in blankets,
lose myself in words,
dull my mind with glowing screens.
And yet, the darkness still draws near.

As my puffy eyes fall closed for the first time
in so, so long...
My mind slows and calms, the barriers falling
the guards leaving at the end of their shift
before the horrors arrive.

It's not long before I can feel the snake
slithering into my slightly parted lips
And sliding down my throat.
Red-rimmed eyes shoot open
and my gaping mouth chokes for air
as it smirks, eyes glittering with pleasure.
The monsters twist around my gut
nibble at my heart
lick their lips with delight
and eye their new victim's soul with desire.

They gently caress my stomach with their claws
leaving red gashes oozing with blood.
And just as I think I've found relief
in your worried blue eyes,
the puppeteers twist my face into a smile.
I feel myself nod and say, "Yes, I'm all good"
as I beg for somebody to hear me,
to stop this pain.

I'm answered with the infiltrators,
now massacring my happy thoughts
and filling my brain with fears.

"Useless"
"Failure"
"They never liked you anyway"
"They wish you were dead"
"Just leave already"
"Leave"
"Leave"
"Leave"

A chant,
a mantra
buzzing at the back of my mind
like a song on replay
always on the radio, no matter
how many times you switch the station.

Thoughts are spiralling
Kicking up the dirt
covering the casket
already set in the ground for me.

And on the tombstone,
"Death by a merciless enemy --
anxiety."

for a brief moment
a nano second
I was aware
unaware of it
it's globular mess
those molecules
green, red, orange, white, blue
bursting
outwards
but pressed to tightly inwards
there was no room for their expression
they repelled
that spherical mess held together with an invisible membrane
explosive
wound up
each desiring to escape from it's counterpart
similar but vastly different
and then the bears claws
elongated
abnormal
scratching a tear down and through my very soul
the inner world met the manifest fears of the outer world
every cell, no, molecule in my body screamed
screamed
screamed
I could only help myself
I awoke

Like a shooting star, what was once now is gone forever
leaving a trail of memories behind,
the only thing lighting this bleak sky called life.
The night is cold and we are restless,
staring at the dark ceiling caging us in.
Headphones cover the ears of the sane,
blocking out the screams of their companions.
And here I stand,
surrounded by voices blending and changing,
monsters streaking out of mouths and
capturing others before freeing them
only to make them its slave – a contagion,
contaminating even the purest of hearts.
The sounds from my sweet songs mix
with the knives from the real world,
easily piercing through the fragile film
that keeps out the monsters.
As the daggers bury deeper into my haven
the darkness slips in,
wrapping me up and stifling my silent screams.
The headphones removed, reality’s sky blinds me
as the monster slides down my throat
and settles in my gut.
It curls around my stomach and lungs and tightens its grip,
now a constrictor leeching the life out of its prey.
I’ve been caught. The virus called life
has
found
me.

there is no light in this place
only broken mirrors
and black cats
and stairs as doorways.
it is too dark here for any man or monster to ever escape

Everything is temporary
My mansion is temporary
The monsters in my mansion
they might live forever
Not in my mansion but they’ll live in another

I am always wary
For the monster are scary
Isn’t that why we call them monsters?
I have to be clever

They may never get the best of me
I will fight until I die
Whatever, whenever, wherever
They cannot defeat me until I’m dead
I’m not about to let them have that

Everyone is afraid.
Of taking that leap.
Diving head first into the unknown.
Letting go of whats comfortable.

Don't be afraid.
For you might find something else.
In that darkness you might find true happiness.
What you truly desire.

Who knows?
You might have it all.
You might have nothing as-well.
But at least you'll find yourself.

Because out of the darkness,
You'll emerge.
Stronger, better, braver.
Do not fear change.

In the shadows:
Are monsters they created for us to fear.
But it isn't true.
Don't lie to yourself.