Though I love you, and I did,
I returned once more to the orchard.
Home seemed so far away,
Clasped in the hands of another.
Every dish washed another breath drawn,
The slick ribbons against the trees.
My love, my wonder, at my side.
Again, my demons embrace me.
Again did I stop outside of my haven,
Praying to a malevolent, unloving light.
Is it wrong to be so human, my doubts,
How could a grey sky be alright?
Why live if living is wrong,
If each whine should be a cry?
My bed felt more like teeth then,
Gnawing at me from each side.
The flowers bloomed under a night sky,
Adorned with all the things I should’ve confessed.
Once again I find myself in that time,
Yet with you I think only of what I’ve repressed.