It's been an honour to break in front of you silently again and again but I've started to think that maybe it's lost it's intended effect-I mean you can only watch someone pick up the broken pieces and promise  it'll never feel hurt again just to crush them in palms that will never hold another's hand and feel them squeeze back without the blood slipping them just out of reach but not really-

a couple of times.
then it just seems desperate.

I hope you find who you are
                            what you are looking for
                            your happiness
                    and true love.

Whatever happens - I am ready
No fears, only excitement
Whatever happens, nothing bothers
Here I am, no suffering, no more

Embracing every obstacle
Like in a game
Even if I got too much out of the frame
Whatever happens, I am ready now
No questioning, no doubts
Playing around
So happy
Being me
That's what I like to be

There's many things I'd change--looking back.
I wish I'd been nicer in high school.
I wish I'd tried harder to be myself.
I wish I wasn't always trying to fit in.
I wish I'd tried harder with the first
woman I loved.
I wish I'd given my family more of my time.
I wish I'd been more careful with my feelings.
I wish I'd understood how quickly money can
Be frivolously spent.
I wish I'd been a better friend
And a calmer person.

Looking back on it all;
I don't think I have regrets.
It all led me to where I am today.
But there are some things I wish I didn't say.

every night
when i walk home
my eyes pierce through the dark
hoping to see you walking, too
towards me
under the streetlights
but you never are

Stare infinitely into the looking glass,
I see a face that's not my own,
Eyes that aren't human,
Lips that move without my intention.

My eyes are plagued with tears,
Flowing down my cheeks,
Madness seeps out of every pore,
I laugh at the reflection of what I see,
For it's not me.

I could imagine the film underneath her eyes
I wondered if I took a needle and poked it in
If I could find the roll of images that hide behind fleshy lids
They flicker
They glisten
They play on repeat
And when I look into her eyes
I swear I can see it all

There I was, caught in labyrinth.
Time & time again I found myself lost.
Following Cupid's arrow.
Round & round I turned.
Still I was a fool to not admit my denial.
Chasing an arrow not meant for me.
Around and around I sought.
Like a dog chasing it's tail

We bowl and yet
no ball is thrown;
our gazes roll
through lanes unseen

two ends,
two pairs
of eyes;

whoever wins,
scatters all
the thoughts
on the other end
like pins