Married with a purpose, always dreamt of a different life all together
This is the reason I don’t believe in god
And why should I,
I don’t know if all this makes sense or not
Is this the case with god that whatever you ask from him
He ll give you totally opposite of the same
I certainly asked for a life happier and more stable than this
Days pass by and I don’t find a single reason to be happy
Days pass by and I don’t find a moment of stableness
Days pass by and all I feel is numbness and pain
Days pass by and all I feel is more distant from my soul
Why only heart dead brain dead is considered to be dead
Isn’t the person who has stopped to feel happiness pain sorry
Who has forget how it is to be happy at all
How it is to feel normal and yourself
How it is to be close to your partner
How it is to have fun in life !!


Why soul dead is not considered to be dead!!
I am not alive why this is not a death in itself!

DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, just an old a family memory on a dinner table--sorry no rhymes :>


to the no one who is not recognizing......
when I stopped for a long stare for me

I stopped and looked around me searching for something that
I don't know stashed deep into the picture I view

I smiled for the happiness that invades those hearts
for the gratitude that my soul is permeated
I crowned the thrones of blood in pure joy
I stole the sounds of laughter

I screened that shot that is bottled into the core of my memories that shot the reason I am on ground in this life
the reason that I believe in the reason that I hang on to the reason

that I long on my stormy nights and deprived alones
I locked them on that table of love and warm clouds attached
when I stopped for a long stare for me

                                                             ­                              ------ravenfeels

White walls
Does anybody see them too?
Locked in
as I am in my head
no way of escape
no way of death

White walls...
No single mark, No mess
It's so bright
perhaps for me,
this is death

Those words spoken long ago
I choked them down dry and raw
Now I find regurgitation
To be the only way
In avoiding asphyxiation
Belief is one thing
Reality another
A monster when combined
Some call it "Love"
Some call it a "Lie"
Delusion is jelly-thick
You know what tastes nice?
Reclusion.
I poisoned myself on hope and seclusion
Love, may you gag on my rotting flesh
My eyes have opened
My mouth agape
Choked out from love's embrace

a door i thought would unlock
remains unmovable in my grasp.
the shock of the fact racing down my spine
faster than a dead man falling from the sky.
a stone dropping in my stomach,
the word "Wait" haunting my every step
and consuming every minuscule thought.
i believed tales of my grandmother and
speeches about the future would be enough.
they were not.
so now i turn back.
looking to find the key buried among the bushes
or hanging from a tree branch.
and retracing my path to find
what stepping stone i missed along the way.
the heavy knowledge that this battle isn't over yet
bleeds into every step, making it harder than before.
and yet...
i can hardly stand to speak the words
but...
in a tiny corner,
half obscured by shadow,
there lives a young ember named hope
and it refuses to burn out.
here's to praying it'll start a forest fire.

A memory is just a story altered.
Every recall differs from the one before it.
The details will fade, though the essence remains.

An orator of the mind spins the tales,
Our experiences catalogue them.

The bitter ones grow even more bitter.
The happy ones grow even happier.

But this mind of mine refused my request.
Figuring some memories are best,
left behind.

And so in my unremembering,
I ponder the splendid and mundane,
that has all been locked away.