The world asks to be patient

To do my best days like this
Have hope despite the constant barrage of problems

To flatten wrinkle of worry across my forehead

But when I achieve that
Can still feel the worry wrinkles in my heart

When thoughts of happiest memories drift into my mind I am momentarily at peace

Perfection the only word that comes close to what those memories feel like

We picture roses and dinner
For us it's also more than that

All images infused with laughter
Affection
Intimacy

Landmarks of relationship laid out before me like the wonders of the world
You are the wonder of MY world

No words ever mattered more or have ever cemented themselves so deeply in my heart as "I love you"

And of countless things about us I have questioned
Belief in that phrase was never one of them

Those who lie dearest to your heart
Care for
All we have is now
Might not get another chance to express feelings
Time may not allow

Strong since I met suffering
Visions of future bright
Silent but risky assumptions
Have more than just tonight

All I do is wish for forever
You never truly know
How many moments remain taken for granted
Or chances left for love to show

Porcelain cracks
My heart is made of plastic

Earth will quake
Glass will shatter
Ceramic vases and statues falling to the ground and breaking apart
China plates will smash
Pieces scattering zillions of different directions

But me
Body will remain strong and unscathed
While others try gluing themselves back together in vain

Holding head in place until the shaking is through so the screws holding it on don't rattle loose

And I am not sure when this transformation occurred
It used to break often
After one too many beatings it evolved into this cold lump in my chest
Safe and sound regardless of who tries to destroy it

Sometimes I feel small and alone
Intoxication will beckon me home
Only find there is nobody there
An empty glass and emptier chair
Maybe if I had not treated them so bad
Loved ones I would HAVE
Instead of HAD