Ignorablity is by far my best quality.
I could be in a room full of people,
Screaming in pain or sobbing like a baby,
And still be ignored.
I'm practically invisible
Sometimes it's good,
But mostly
It's a curse.
I've been crying every day this week,
But unsurprisingly,
No one has bothered to ask me why.
I'm slowly crumbling into myself,
Dying,
Alone,
Afraid,
Starving for care.
Yet,
Unsurprisingly
No one
Was
There.

It wakes me in the morning
The song you dedicated
Now some would say this is obsession
But I beg to disagree
My mind knows well that you are his
But my heart keeps you near
And I'm sorry for the inconvinience
I swear I've tried to unlove you
And I've tried to ignore you and forget you
But my heart keeps on betting on you
We both know you'll never read
All the poems I lay here,
So grant me this reception
It's all I got from your deception.

When I was a little girl,
I was told to be seen and not heard.
Invisible to my self and others.
I dared not laugh, I dared not cry.
Alive but no longer living.
I loved you,
But I feared you.
Your bouts of rage and madness.
Love that was conditional and fleeting.
I just wanted to scream and shout,
SEE ME!
LOVE ME!
But I learned to remain out of sight and sound.
I became vacant but yet present.
When I tried to feel,
Tried to be me,
I was told that you were too busy,
To spend time with me.
"Go out and play",
"Find some friends",
"Don't bother me".
So I would sit outside alone and cry.
Still waiting to be loved...
Now that I am grown,
I no longer seek your love.
I no longer stay in the background.
But make my presence known.
Loud and clear,
I will be seen,
I will be heard,
So *******!
Though you made me what I am today,
It will never take the pain away.

Don't ignore me
I'm standing right in front of you
My heart still beats
And yet you stare right through it
Like I'm not even there
I beg for your acknowledgment
Still you don't listen
I feel like I don't exist
Life becomes meaningless
And still
You ignore me

While going for a walk through a pretty bare trail I came across a blooming white flower. Let me remind you, it's the middle of April after the worst winter in a decade and the most snow Michigan has ever received. Anyways, while witnessing this white flower I felt the need to speak and connect with it.
So I spoke to the flower in a desperate tone saying "please, little white flower, teach me your ways." Knowing it wouldn't respond I continued. "How can you bloom so beautiful surrounded by this?" "Surrounded by brown and gray you blossom with pearl. I cannot bloom as bright in a world full of brightness, yet you bloom brighter in your world or darkness." I think for a moment though. "Maybe my world is as dark, if not darker. And your message to me is to see beyond the naive. To come out stronger when everyone else Is under the brush, to speak even louder when the others stay hushed."

But the thing is, this little white flower was just born to bloom first, born to be white, just born in the marsh to be ignored.
Yet as humans we try our hardest to change who we are to get noticed, an still don't.
Now I think that says something.

When shes standing there
Upset with you cause
You left her,
When she needed you most
You left her,

Would you stand and fight?

When shes crying in front of her
Broken because
You left her,
When she wanted you so badly
You left her,

Would you tell her to get over it?

When shes trembling before you
Torn inside because
You left her,
When she swore she missed you more
You left her,

*Would you get up and leave?

I crave your acceptance
I thirst for your love
I don’t want to share
Baby you’re my air
I need you to live
I need you to breath
You never see how much I struggle
To make you see the trouble
I go through to have you look at me
I feel these emotions flow through me like the sea
Will you please just notice me
Take a second to talk to me
Will you set these terrible thoughts free
I can’t hold them in anymore
It’s emotional war