When you left for a reason
I said, “I understand.”
But actually, I don't.
My fault, I regretted.
Still thinking why,
Overthinking.

I love you
More than myself
Sacrificed all I have
I thought, “I’ll be fine.”
Missing your arms now
Feeling cold and blue.

Your smiling face
I'm missing it so much
Looking at your photos
Can't remember how many times
Where are you now?
Are you coming back?

I'm patiently waiting here
Even there’s a little or no assurance
for you to come back.
I'm still under your spell
still blinded by your words.

Someone’s telling me I'm dumb
For believing your promises
I love this illusion you gave me
Don’t wake me up until I figure out
The truth that you already left me.

God once gave sinners a chance
So, who am I to be stingy?
How much chances I need to give?
I'm already insane
Insanely in love with a fool.

One, two, three.
In just three seconds
I fell for you.

One, two, three.
In just three seconds
you told me you liked me.

One, two, three.
In just three seconds
you said you love me.

One, two three.
In just three seconds
you promised me forever.

One, two, three.
Who would've have thought that in just three seconds
you could easily leave me.

I love you
But you don't know

I admire you
But you don't know

I want to hug you
Like the wind always do

I want to kiss you
Even if you don't want to

Can you see?
Can you even notice?
How shameless I am?
Beco'z just for you
Anything I can do

Even you don't know
That I always here for you

You are just a man in my stupid fantasy
A perfect picture of what is to be my reality
Oh! How I wish you’re real for me to hold you tight
And that it will always be you I hug at night.

You’re a very fine product of my mind’s wildest imagination
A shadow of my heart’s foolish creation
Oh! How I know you’re just a face of thin air
A handsome canvass of a man filled with so much love and care.

Am I mad? Lonely? I really don’t know!
I never imagined I had scooped this low.
Everyday longing. Every moment waiting.
Hoping that somehow, someday, it will be you I’m finally seeing.

It is very stupid of me, I admit
Making fool of myself out of the feeling I can’t omit
But can you blame me of creating a love that’s impossible?
How I wish that my reasons to you will be acceptable!

I’ve already gone this far
My mind perfected the image of what you are
Now it’s up to me to make you real
Adding the feelings I want to reveal

I hope that someday you’ll understand
That when I made you, I felt so grand
And even if you just exist in my fantasy and in my dreams, don’t worry
It’s always going to be you I’ll love ‘til eternity.

Would I ever be in your thoughts as I flood memories of you and me in my head?
Would I ever be that name you would state as you smile with friends and acquaintances?
Would I be the person who would be there for you and turn your frown upside down?
Would I? Because you are the axis of my world, you circle around my life as if you own it by some sort.
You are everything I never expected to be granted upon an unsaid wish
Would I? Just be something more to you as you are something far more special than any diamond this world could ever have. Would I?

I can’t shake off these emotions, this feeling of unwanted affection towards you, a person who makes me smile when there’s no reason to smile, makes me laugh at things I never knew was humorous.
I can’t still seem to shake that off, that replay of heartbreaks going over and over again how I knew you will never feel the same way, yet I still hope, still do. An ongoing war of choosing let it go or not to.
Shake what off? Something pasted and carved in so deep that it can’t be fixed, that whatever I’m feeling for now is shaking me off, off to the world of imaginations where you and I would be in. Though I knew that feeling has already shaken you already and you have stood in a ground where nothing could ever be quivered by anyone.

tell me if a heart would know
what's worth fighting for
and what's not
cause the guilt
can't be taken over
by a sip of black coffee
the curiosity can't be wiped off
even if it's raining heavily
this little empty space
was built for you
brick by brick
hoping it was enough
for you to call it home
and it wasn't only just
up for rent

As my mind spins around
I feel six feet underground
A noose around my throat
A fall in the water wish I brung my coat
A car crash where I die
But to afraid to say goodbye
The feeling of being numb
As I see death come
I turn away
To go with him another day
Then wondering when
As I walk back to where I have been
As my life goes on
I will sit here at dawn
Wishing to fall
Or get a life saving phone call
See I won't die
Or say goodbye
But everyday I get closer to death
Because I'm not scared of taking my last breath

Walking with you was one of the best,
It gives me joy among the rest.
Looking at you makes my heart stop,
Like I was arrested by a cop.

I want the world to see,
What you really mean to me.
For every smile you give,
It gives me strength to hold on.
For every love you contribute,
It gives blissfulness in me.

But for every baneful words you give,
The more I become effete.
What if the time come and you will be gone,
Will I bee seeing myself happy again?
We don't know the flow of the weather,
But I know someday we can walk again together.