A Summer's day, I think nay!
Where art the fruits oh to bloom?
Me dwell in a hopeless Church,
to carry my cross, blind I search,
look to your right, look to your left,
surrounded by God's cheerful test.

Mock me oh Father, shatter this fool!
The more he starves the better the cards!
Nay, pray, outsmart it all, never decay!
Fields of violet brushes thy chest,
they soften thy ego and puts it to rest!

Shake me! Crush my illusions evermore!
Turn all inside out, and bless my soul!
Repair the sick and pick out the rotten!
Challenge me, grow me, push me to the limit!
I see, ye test my Strength, how far can I go?
Oh but Lord don't you know, I can't say no?

Finish me! Break this ego apart. Hang him high!
O pain, O cleansing Fire, ye burn the shadows well.
I thrive when you provoke my wickedness!
As you flush with rivers wild my hidden mess.
Lions eat! Digest all flesh, blood and meat!

You Lord and I, in a storm delight,
a battle between the ghost and the Light.

Wringing my hands
Whistling to no tune in particular
Wrestling my ego

And I’m losing
Badly
It ***** me up
Every single time
I’m onto something
Something legit
It gets in the way
Bosses me around
Screws me over and over again
Whispers nonsense in my ear
Derails my flawless plans
Turns people away from me
Makes me despicable

But if it taught me anything
Anything at all
Is that you should always keep going
Always
No matter the odds

So here I am
Still wrestling
Won't give up

i brushed up against the spirit molecule,
and now my paintbrush is stained
with the most vivid and true of colors.
i tripped into the abyss
only to be greeted by the floor
of the gods.
A scraped knee, in a mental mecca
is a sure enough trade off for me.

I feel my words haven't rung true from the start
Because crucially
The reality
is I was never that good to begin with

I only wanted to make some light out of this dark
But the emotion is
A bloatedness
Of my own self-inflated ego and pride

I could never call this as an attempt at art
Nor should others
There are greater wonders
By those who can truly inspire

But still, I try to play my own small part
In this scene
Against philistines
To fail is never a reason to retire

An ego voice echoes
louder and louder blocking
my true essence.

It bombards with grip like pit bull
trying to take the rains of control.
My reality is chocked down to the bones
vibrating with invisible bars.

Until I say no more
Until I say no more

No more to the lies
so I can stand in my greatness
and celebrate me.

No more to floating in a bed of tears
from untruths that take me away
from my own sacredness.

Its time to listen to the wind
and move with change as bells tow.

Time to shower in my divinity,
knowing I deserve to live free
from judgement and fear.

Hello new me,
I take back my power
to see the sun.

Goodby ego
I serve you no more
and shut down the ego voice that rambles.

StarBG © 2017

Knowing me, you know, you should know
I am bottled, my silence uncustomary to your ears
Past the nights when love soaked my voice
The sky's light-show is out tonight, lightning storm
Your pout, your snarling laugh, your light, your intellect
Thunder crashes me back to my loneliness
You are thunder that warns of rain coming
Water vital to a desert
Little did I know only I can bring the rain
That will cultivate and germinate my lands

Endurance through unknown chains 
Wrapping themselves around each bone 
Making any move beyond possible
A catastrophe to breathe,
In or out; no attempt! 
Made by a swollen chest! 
Your heart, about to explode
From the guilty pain 
Caused by your brain
These chains clank and wriggle
Around your very throat..
Breeding warped words 
Out of your mouth 

Your damaged womb 
Of priceless pleasure
Copulates with heavy burden
Passing onto old wounds 
The emergence of haemorrhage
From lips that could smile in bliss
And kiss...

With no proof 
That life exists 
Beyond that shared moment   
And you..
Still in self made chains 
asking for some justice 
None can give.

Restless nights
inner fights
The past haunts
loneliness taunts.
Behind the doors
for not the world to see...

Weeping sorrows
praying for better tomorrows
This soft place of him
only few get in.
Behind his smile
for not her to see...

Tough and strong
he may be wrong
Capable of all bad deeds
yet, the love he needs.
Inside the cocoon
not the light to reach...

Inner self cries
So many whys???
Killed by avoidance
waiting for the chance.
Behind the wall of ego
for not her to reach...

And he cries
for not her to reach...

And he cries
for not her to reach...