i always have everything
everything .
Except for serotonin and dopamine

His strong arms
hold me close and tight
keeping me warm.

His strong arms
are raised up to fight
those wishing harm.

His strong arms
lift me high like I'm
a jar full of air.

His tender fingers
twist the tendrils in
my naked hair.

His face, his feet, his chest, his gut inside it
are Chakras he never hided
when we both decided

...to show each other
let go of our pasts
to grow in each other.

We each have the strengths the other lacks,
but how can we make space living on each other's backs?

His strong arms
tend me like
a living room.

His strong arm
sows seeds in
my bleeding womb.

His arms stronger than any enemy's of mine
cannot fight what they cannot find.

Demons he cannot see he cannot face,
so they will take me away from him without a trace.

when the ice breaks beneath our feet
will you wake up next to me
in the hospital bed?
with an intravenous drip in
your forearm again.
the aroma of ammonia perforates my
limbic system and emotions and memories
just gush into me relentlessly,
sheer bliss funnels through
the corridors and chemical stores
and finds its rest in my room.
the walls are moist with dopamine.
my bones could break with the weight of
this happiness and it'd only drag on
for longer.
i'd wake up laughing and it made
everyone uncomfortable.

Your mind is a treasure that I'd love to discover
An abyss of thoughts and logarithms only you can translate
Your mind makes love better than the body can
It's a dopamine high I can't resist
So as I sit here, I **** on your words as if they were a pair of lips
I sip on your wisdom for it is the finest wine.

Jen, never worry because I promise you that everything is going to be okay.
Your mind is as breathtaking as views from Table Mountain and your love is as beautiful as the Sistine Chapel.
Life for us was different a few weeks ago, silhouettes of dreams keep me holding on to a different hope.
Two minds flooded with dopamine, our disagreements show that we have more issues than weekly magazines.
But our love proves that nothing has changed in regards to the connection that we share.
I still write about you in hopes that one day you’ll read all these words and hopefully find your way back to me.
The moment that you opened up your eyes, I was right there by your side and my love for you comes as no surprise.
When my blue skies have turned grey, I listen to that one Emeli Sandé song and reminisce about you every single day.
So babe, it’s okay you can hold me now, hold me down and hold me always.
Listening to Long Live the Angels and taking note of the colours in my dreams.
When the relentless heat of the summer sun drove me crazy all I could think about was your smile and those beautiful brown eyes.
I’ve come to accept that love is a part of me even when it’s apart from me.
Jen, never worry because I promise you that everything is going to be okay.

Dopamine dreams
Scream escape.

Is it too late to confront and accept
The fears that have crept
Into this weeping mind?

I don't remember much of my childhood
Ignorance is blind
The adult doesn't mind
But my child self dreams of trauma
It's thorns burrowing in.
But where there are thorns
Roses can bloom
If I fight I can give happiness room to grow
For through knowing the lowest heartache
In the spectrum of pain
can the sunshine and rain
Nurture the roses of happiness and joy
Because the contrast will buoy the soul
and love dwells in the heart that has seen both joy and tears
and empathises both with people who know despair and joy
for there is truth in both sides
and their worlds sometimes collide.

Straight forward word ****
Blunt broken and scorn
All dopamine no thought
Thrills and pills
Forget the skills
Just saying what they want.
No chill no build
A populace guild
Only say it if its hot.