I’ve never actually been with another.

I have a close friend.

But I yearn for intimacy with a female.

Within extended pauses.

This lingering feeling.

Rises from its hole.

And finds me up through the undertow.

Bewildering me with a chasm of alienation.

And shrouding me in its dismal light.

I let myself foolishly steep in it.

Until I am saturated with my own self pity.

As pity rots away it turns to anger.

And I decay into a more disgusting person.

One who self loathes. The root of my problem.

How can one love if they don’t love themself.

The tremble of your lips grasping at the idea of sound, of sentences.
What is there to share, what to make of secrets?

The soft, swift, brief touch of our knees,
The recoil that follows immediately.

The pattering of your voice over the chatter of the shop
making the mundane a private, intimate affair.

The way you shifted in your seat next to me,
Concerned with the space you and I and we were occupying.

The tentative nature of your suggestions,
How you watched and waited for me to lead.

Eyes elicit
smiling, tease.
Playfully ponder,
fluently please.
Lofty, loquacious,
words a'weave,
what's the message
I am to recieve?

I dive left before heading right, more times than I care to admit,
Each time I turn right and am not confronted, it feels like rejection,
A small death of little consequence for the life that could have been
So sweet, so superficial, a mini life grew- as I read your bio,
To be dashed in another instant of silence,
I have a tendency to rush into things without much guidance.

Your voice is sweet and smooth- to read,
Imagine a personality that fits- perfectly in the palm of my hand,
Conveyed in small white messages, poked through smaller holes,
Each one I read makes me feel a little brighter inside,
But each little light catches fire and dies, I must confide
That each one I read makes me feel alive.

But only for the moment, so I conduct another,
Small parcel containing another little piece of my soul,
“If you can feel your soul slowly, slipping away, that means that you still have one”
That is a phrase that will lead you to defeat before you have begun,
It leads to me giving away much less than I can afford,
These ‘one for one’ serotonin boosts are leaving me bored…

So maybe we could meet, go get something to eat,
I am sure that I won’t be bored by your topic of conversation,
Or at least I will try and make it look that way,
Because the cold reality is that we have nothing in common,
Except for a lack of self-esteem and an overestimation of our-
Social skills, next to non-existent,
I am perpetually distant!

I am sure that you were terrifically disappointed with last night
Because your messages are written on withered pieces of paper,
A full stop is the most definite thing that there is,
Subtle undertones have a pulse and it beats,
Black blood to and from a dying heart,
I should have known that you were poison, right from the start.

How do I stop seeing your radiant face through my days?
why do I keep hearing the tune of your alluring voice
In my head
I just met you yet there was so much left unsaid
Like a shooting star Illuminating the sky
Not focused on any other
How could I
When my eyes were caught by your smile and hair color
i know its soon
But can we share one more night  
With the moon
Where you are the only one in sight
i promise you ill keep this in and be polite
Since I just met you this probably wont sound right

What colour are your eyes?

The questioned, breathes in, shakes his head and sighs

Sir, they’re not disguised,

after all they are my eyes,

and I make no attempt to keep them closed but open like the skies.

The things I say to you, well, they aren’t ******* lies,

and your own stupidity is what will be your demise.

the questioner looks puzzled, sudoku plastered across his face

Oh sir! You look confused!

Well In that case,

To figure out the colour, just look at one place,

A place full of grace,

So sit back and brace,

Just look into my eyes you ******* idiot.

The questioner looks offended, face throbbing bright pink

Sir, I think you might need a drink.

No water? Then your eyeballs might shrink!

Here’s your drink! Clink!

If you can’t tell a persons eye colour, by using your own eyes, then sir that must really stink,

That’s actually kind of ironic don’t you think?

The questioner looks baffled, his confusion slowly on the rise

You look so confused, I think your retina could be fried!

Has he died?

I mean he’s just sitting there,

the questioner sits back and cries

Like a group of the alphabet tried to tell him the Beatles were back,

The questioned couldn’t believe his i’s

the questioned looked puzzled, embarrassed and baffled

Puzzled like scrabble

Embarrassed like he’d been tackled

Baffled like Seattle (so baffled, even his rhyming didn’t make any sense)

Green

The questioner looks up with a smile

I’m sorry, it’s been a while,

I’m not used to dating old style,

So far, it’s not been worthwhile, and I didn’t mean to be hostile but my lifestyle has been freestyle and like a pile of bile it’s been vile.

Now I know I can be a task, but sir why did you ask?

the questioner looks into the eyes of the questioned, at that moment all thoughts and feelings have been beckoned

They hold a persons secrets,

Wether or not we’re destined,

More powerful than a thousand questions,

And yours are perfection.

the questioned blushes, leans forward with intrigue, glowing like sunrise

So tell me sir, what colour are your eyes?

The clouds hum in soft white,
As the sky sings electric blue,
With the strings played by sunlight,
And percussion by the meadow rue,

If I stare into the distance long enough,
Will these thoughts pass on to you?

You're the one
And the next feels right
I'm in debt to your focus on me
My eyes won't leave you
Hope we can be, I'm in like
I'll be yours if we meet again
Make me the one
Have you been in love?
Lovely vector
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