i have struggled to make decisions
all my life
so they’ve always been made for me
what i wear
what haircut i have
what i eat
indecisiveness has always been
my worst enemy
but i chose you
and that’s the only choice
that i am sure of
the decision was mine
nobody made it for me
i own it.

You tell me to choose
Little do you know
The choice was made up for me decades ago

I didn't have a say at all
My cards were snatched out of my hand
I watched all of my aces fall

Choices are always harder for the woman
Something you could never understand
I want to live just one day as a man

You tell me to choose
Little do you know
The choice was taken from me decades ago

I’d like to jot a historic note
One of truths and one where facts remote
Find the facts; here’s your game
One is true and the other defames

I’m an elephant at a zoo
On display, with something to prove
Fake and force fed to stay alive
Forced and caged I’d rather die
I’m an elephant at a zoo
With a trunk full of water
Blowing straight crap out my mouth,
Not fit to be a father
Not actually that unique
And more of a bother
Not ready for life I’d like to be out
But used to being sheltered
Owned by someone but feel headstrong
I’m a big strong mammal with weak wavelengths
Brains a peanut and heads down ashamed
If life’s a zoo then I’m on the main stage

I’m a free gazelle
Headlights a wonder
Ankles are weak from birth after mother
spotted and brown my consciousness is splattered
I’m free to be me yet shot at the same
There’s perks to free range
But rents like open season
Going to be broke by august
Hit my heart without a fine given or any reason
I don’t know what those lights are and why do they move quickly?
Why am I on a hood? Where am I going?
What is my purpose what’s this mantle they speak of?
My heads now on a rack and my eyeballs are marble
I can’t see my pain or feel my legs
But atleast I chose this route and tried to cross that street
Instead of being spoon fed;  lesson learned I suppose
Life’s like a cage I’d rather be out then in a box decomposed

I feel my heart slipping.. into a deep well of grief. My voice feels trapped behind a wall of lies and distortions. Swimming to the truth, I slip in and out of consciousness. Feeling the inevitable demise of my life fall before my eyes. Am I to fold and give up for the fear of drowning or do I soldier on regardless of my fate; at least I fought? In this uncertain revelation of what my decision can cause, I ponder my next move declining to submerge myself in a mirage..