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Olivia Dec 2014
nobody told me i
needed armor for this battle

i though i had already
won the war.
Allison Dec 2014
my mouth is wrapped in the tape of social conduct
my hands cuffed in handbooks and rules

I'm standing on this balcony teetering on social suicide and endless solitude
Running away into my pen and paper because it's the only one who can listen

Numbers and phrases you paste on my forehead like a bandaid, your words hold weight but not to the strongmen
Im on my hands and knees screaming myself raw and the clueless raise a glass and tell another joke

The castle I've built in your arms is tumbling down I'm under siege from my allies
It's a slow death being inches from your legacy and thousands of miles away in your sacred heart
This is about a personal struggle I've been battling for a couple months.
Makenzie Marie Nov 2014
You’re gaining my dear
but nothing good.
Step on the scale
though you said you never would...
Want a toothbrush
and a blade?
Because then, I can trick you
into thinking that everything is okay.
Don’t look in the mirror
you already know what you’ll see.
You’re worse off than ever,
you don’t deserve to eat.
So what, it’s Thanksgiving?
You’ve had enough treats.
and everyone can see it plainly.
So skip Christmas too,
if you can swing it.
Run until you can't breathe.
quit your complaining,
and drink something without calories.
Because hey,
soon enough you’ll be happy
back down to size three;
you’ll be able to breath.
As you well know
nothing good comes easy.
so work your **** off
lose any inch that you can squeeze.
when you can see your ribs again
I promise you’ll thank me.

with love
your E.D.
I 've been conscious of my battle with my eating disorder since my sixth grade.  It's been almost eight years.  I hit rock bottom years ago and I have promised myself  that I  will never get that low again. I have gotten treatment and therapy, and I am better. I'm just not better yet at accepting myself in my view of "perfection." Though I have stayed relatively clean for two years, I know it is a never ending battle.  And despite this, and my occasional slip ups, I am beyond determined not to lose to this monster. I will conquer this, but I don't know if I'll ever get it out of my head.
P F Rutledge Nov 2014
The sun beating down
Makes the sweat pour like rain.
The snow on the ground
Makes the skin freeze to ice.

You are there.
I am here.

We talk and chat across the land.
Yet all I want is to hold your hand.
To hold you close to my heart.
So nothing will again set us apart.

One day I'll come home in serenity.
Just to hold you for all of eternity.

But then there may come a day
Where I can't make it back your way.
I want you to try and move on
Knowing I'm forever yours alone.

Before a mission, I write this now.
When I'm done I say ado with a bow.
I grab my weapon and begin to walk.
Hoping above all that again we'll talk.

Until next comes that time
I'll say goodbye, speechless like a mime.
This castle in the mist
we ride on to find in ruins
Shattered pillars, wrapped in ivy
mark the graves of the loved ones

They were brave, they were thoughtless
They blazed on, with their swords drawn

This broken kind
this broken kind
this broken kind of beautiful

They danced on through the night
The attackers lay in wait
Courageous ones showed no sign
of the fear creeping at the gate

They were lost, they were hopeful
Young ones at the ready

This broken kind
this broken kind
this broken kind of beautiful

Battle drums
Beating sun
Red rivers mark the field they once played in
Final stand
Shaking hands
hold each other for the last time

We're a broken kind
a broken kind
a broken kind of beautiful
courtney ropp Sep 2014
I am torn in half.
One piece to the East,
And the other to the West.

The East a world of peace, There
I live in confidence of your promise.
I see Joy.
I see Love.
I see it there...You.

The Wild West, a place of confusion, There
I see Hurt.
I see Disappointment.
I see it there...You.

Someday, the two will be one.
They will meet in the middle.
I see Conflict.
I see Resolution.
I see it there...hopefully it's You.
20 July '14
I am rich from all the things I have lost
Vanishing into a mist of missed opportunities
The knowledge lies inside, quiet like a lake
When he leaves for battle my skin aches and breaks
We take on our true form when they're gone
Layers of flesh fall to the ground
Underneath this tiny heart a dragon rises from the ground
I open yellow eyes and wake
Tough skin and deadly claws
You smiled at me and disappeared
For many years I will guard alone
The tiny home we call our own
Shed my skin and try on a new soul
Thousands of years old and rusted to the bone
My soul springs awake, gets ready for battle
But nothing lasts forever, nothing is ever given
Words are written, said and stolen
They want it back
Eventually
They always want it back
Greediness is the wound of Man
The result is spilled blood
And fallen tears
Wars are fought over countries
Murders are committed by passion
Cold blooded, show no compassion
Red is the colour of our everyday lives
And in necessary cases we spread our wings wide
Our homes we protect, our treasures we hide
We bare our teeth and hiss a cry
To scare them away we aim and fire
Open our eyes and watch over our treasure
In the midst of war we still smile and murmur
Make promises of brighter days
We will hand our skin in the living room
And pretend we never left the room
We will smile and welcome them home
Under the rug the trap will squeak quitely
A hidden mistress underneath our home
Treasures lie quiet and concealed
*Late at night
I
Open
The
Safe
And
Peek
In it I can see all the treasures you didn't take away from me
Bridget D Nov 2014
Why do we hide.?
We hide our darkest desire
....
Because our pride always wins
&
the heart never.
something that I'm trying to understand...
AMcQ Nov 2014
Forever beating heart;
Why do you flee
the safety of
my chest once more?
Is it so that
you may confront
your opponent...
has the mind provoked you?
Perhaps you sailed north
of your own accord;
to pry open my lips
and pour out love
as I battle to suppress
your persistence.
Sully Nov 2014
Pull* "The dog says: 'Bark'"
Pull "The cat says: 'Meow'"
Pull "The human says: 'The human says: 'The human says: 'The human says: 'The human says: 'The human says:......

The human says: 'I can understand that.'
                               Sternly command that.
                               shear and plow and smelt and can that
                            
                               I can make a plan
                               to catch and **** and roast and feast
                               on that hard quill and bristle beast

                               And I can stain his image on the living rock
                               no, not to mock
                               But to remember what feats we drew
                              up from ourselves
                               As the javelins flew
              
                              My hands are clever
              They chip the stone, and scrape the wood,
                      and wind the sinew

             My tongue is cleverer still
             My words are the creeping shadow of my  thoughts
             And just as a shadow is drawn along behind,
                     and stretches in the late dying sun
             And snaps to attention in the noonday swelter, to heel,                                                  obedient
­             My words precede me, and linger behind, and snap to my side to attack
             And defend
             And manipulate

             For well you know, dear reader
             That words move men to move mountains
             They can drive him to brave the tusks and teeth
              And reward him with praise, as the fire flickers against portraiture
             Of a hundred beasts
             Deadly, proud, roaring
             And in the end, delicious.

            How splendid am I
            To suss out basic truths
            From straight-line scratches
            In the dirt
            I can learn the rules
            of all that ever was
                            And to learn, is to understand,
            is to become unfettered
            
            I can cleave, dissect, *****, inject
            And figure it all out
            And learn from a loosing bout
            
             Every monster brought low
              will be investigated
              To see how we can end him easier

Until the last monster
Is man himself
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