The mountain calls to me, demands my presence, I meet its gaze.

Me: What do you want from me?

Mountain: I want you to climb to the peak

Me: I can’t bring anyone else with me

Mountain: I do not ask of you to bring anyone else, in fact, you should leave them behind, now climb me

Me: No, I can’t just do that

Mountain: Whether you listen to them or listen to me, makes no difference but I know you, and you want to climb, with no safe pathway down, no net to hold you, you want to see from this height and this height alone

Me: What if I want off?

Mountain: Then jump, but know the ground awaits you, you are never free

I stand in its shadow.

Hi…
I’m so alone.
I want to talk to
someone—
I say ”hi”,
they say “goodbye”,
and walk away.
I wish they’d
stay.

I’m so alone,
each moment
I exist,
I fade away—
a group forms,
backs turned,
building a wall,
tall and mighty.
I walk away,
only to feel
the silence
beating me
down,
leaving me
lonely again.

I’m so alone—
But once—
I met someone
with a warm smile,
blazing like a
fireplace.

And when
that someone
comes up
to say “hi”,
I forget
I’m alone.

For a moment
I belonged…
But I realize
the fire
won’t last
long.

I’m so alone—
Someone asked
if I’m “okay”
only for me to say
“I’m fine”—
or “goodbye”
and walk away,
not knowing
where to go—

Only to
feel cold
and alone
again…

Goodbye

The hands on the clock are slender,
Like her fingers,
Who used to weave through mine.

Soft was her voice,
It could grace you like an ocean breeze,
Or it could work like a hurricane,
Make you wish you never left shore.

This new winter snow,
The color of her skin.
Thin as her kiss,
Leaving me warmer than I was before.
These days I find myself missing it more and more.

But she didn't leave,
It was I,
I had to return home,
She didn't beg me to stay, she knew I couldn't.

But I know,
Someday we will find each other again,
And in time, I will remember her kiss.

I was never taught to write a love poem

From a young age I learned how to grieve
I learned how to keep myself on my feet
I learned how to wallow on perilous ground
I learned to stand up when I fell down

I was taught to smile to keep hatred away
I was taught to keep my emotions at bay
I was taught to do everything on my own
I learned to love being alone

I learned to build barriers all around
But I was never taught how to break them down
I learned that if a crush seemed to stay
I needed to to push my feelings away

I never learned to love or to give anything to you
Now I don't even know how to break through

This was for my love but I'll never show him
These strands of sorrow meant to be a love poem

There is a sadness in my eyes
That no one knows
Feeling lost and alone
The emptiness grows

All I ever wanted was a love, a love that was true
A love that would shelter me when everything was blue

With hope in my eyes and pain in my heart
I look to you to help me restart
My life

Can you put your anger aside and hold my hand through this dark lonely night
And carry me to a brand new day
Where the sky is blue again and the sun shines the way

You are my rock, my shelter from the storm
Can you give to me and keep me safe and warm

Hold me in your arms and never let me go
Letting nothing come between us
Ever again.

She sat staring into the blackness where her heart had once been the love she felt for him lays broken amongst the shadows where she has walked many times before breaking a little more everytime soon there will be nothing left to break and she will become cold and make this darkness her home.

My mind is a
Blind winter,
The wind of
inner thoughts,
thrive like a wild child,
Heart beating louder
Like thunder,
Chills spines
down inside,
Shaking, cold,
And still holding
Onto what kills me.

I can’t find a place
that’ll keep my
face warm,
In this blind winter—
I’ve been following
the whispers
of bitter souls
I conjured—

“You’ll—
                            die—
       alone—
                        in—
the—
            snow—”

I’ve been following
Traces of snow of
rewind tapes—
To moments
left paralyzed…
I feel lost in time…

In the blind
winter snow…