When I asked you what I should do. you told me...
"Yeah, I guess it would make sense to end it now."
I could feel a crippling cold in my lungs mid summer
my heart is no stranger to a strangers lack of care.
It's just a summer ******.

At least when left alone, let alone the thought of being lonely, I never consider taking my own life before its meant to be taken from me.

At least when I talk to you, you remind me like your reliquary for lost tears, you tear through me unraveling my armor to all my inner most fears.

Giving myself a gift of agony inside of antagonizing images of my self.
Ambition and bravery give way to craven humility. disguising howls towards the moon as laughter laughed to soon. I dug my grave today just to give prayer to the future,

I piece myself back together with my words like a surgeon who's done this a thousand times.

He who is practiced in the way of emotion suture

His hands never getting steadier operating on the child inside him with his rhymes.

It never gets any easier
it only gets worse.
After all,
how can you do your job,
when you run out of thread
and there's a thundering in your head.

When you've got twenty-five to thirty for life to become death.
You kind of want to be in control of your last breath

Little known is the thought we throw to the side.
inside insidiously we tried
to hide the being with the wish I hope to confide.

Let alone the disillusioned idea of property or love owned by the self.
let alone the thoughts we've left canned on the shelf.
Like a man with no remorse I open those cans with a thought in mind.

I hope I can find your love inside of at least one, with empathy of my task in kind

We debate and argue its meaning
Its ability absolute
Its hold without stain
It could have chosen differently
It could have given but today it took
Just give it up
Theres no point debating time and its meaning

Last night I sat
Wanting a cigarette
Work ******
Had to disown my father
I might be homeless in a few weeks
I couldn't help but cry
But then I realized
My friend might have cancer
I have no reason to cry
so I smiled
I might be bald in a few weeks too.

You told me if you'd buy me a flower, you'd rather grow me a rose bush and send it to every other man you can think of. but i'd be on the end of that list. at least i'd be on the end of that list. all i've ever been is at the end of a list. It hurt more than when we kissed. let alone when i felt your hands on my wrist.

My bones sing songs of distant memories
One's of my happiest days
Some of my worst
They retell stories of what I became
What was to become of me
My age
But it doesn't matter
I don't care what they sing
I don't care what their personification is
They will still find themselves in a dogs mouth
Some day

Don't stress it. try your hardest, or your very best.
Actually just do it, or don't.
Nothing makes the perfect human being.
Try to be kind, to others always pay mind
Never make a promise you cant keep
Don't look at others with vision so steep
Don't do a lot of things
Do a lot of things.
Just be the best person you can be

We ask what it looks like, But you have not seen it
We ask what it felt like, but you haven't felt it
You assure us it's there, You assure us someone did something
Someone turned off the light and You want us to find the switch
You beg and plead for the light to come back on.
But we can't as much as we want to help you
Because the light,
Never existed...

First girl I dated
Second Girl I loved
No need count the one before her
Brianna was so much more
and not much less
of what I expected
to fall in love
with

And there I saw it, the sky fell with burning cinders.
My mind almost speechless
"Oh ****"

If you are to put me in the ground you must **** me
If you are to **** me, you must do it in one hit.
Because if you fail...

Cigarettes stopped tasting the way they should
They stopped holding that zest that made me content
The nicotine buzz isn't worth the smell
The moment I stopped and looked
The ashes no longer sang to me
My lighter no longer kept me warm
The same day,
I got to know you

We'll Start off, making our way towards oblivion
The smell of cheap cologne and drinks
We'll ink the way our hearts bleed onto our arms
No reason to hide our motives when we cast a line
after all.
We both bit at the bait. And now you have me.
And I have you.
You're forehead pressed against mine
grins as wide as the man on the moon
Stealing kisses here and there, Its a shame
We wont remember the night

Poems should be simple like a brush
So that you get the Idea of its purpose
But as complex as a riddle
Because the beauty,
Is when you understand
How much work was put into it

I've been blinded seven fold by a world that begs for compassion. I have tasted the waters filled with disease, I neglect them. I have heard the gun shots down the street, I haven't raised an ear. I have seen the impunity of brutality on streets I would call home. I've looked away. I do not feel shame. For this, I am sorry. But I can't worry about that right now, not with my own life on the line.

My twisted tongue speaks words less than wise
But it is enchanted with loves sound
An escape artists hands
The memory of forgotten love
It knows not how to speak the full truth
And it cant tell an entire lie
That the words I speak leave existence to die
That creation was a toy of the mind so we must play with it
Taking ostracized thoughts and bring them back home
Take no moment of deepest secret thought
Of the most sacred of intentions
Leave none unmade and let all be known
There's a reason that ink cannot be easily unwritten
It is the will of creation that what has been made
Not be unmade

I mere moment of your hands in mine
The taste of your words on my ears
It's all I want to hear.
I don't care how over used it is
I don't care what it means to others
I just want to hear you say those words
The one's that seem to escape
Your vocabulary

Pragmatic is the virtue of diligence. Always active in the common comedy, let alone the discipline desired to do what's destined to unfold before this paragon. His jaw is angled from clenching his teeth in anticipation, her breath steadily drawing in the heavy air around her. Eyes dilating in excitement. All because diligence reaps what is sows

"Once more," Richardson said grabbing his hat and throwing it into the air. the  ball cap slid up through the air slicing the light from the moon and stars. The sky clear on a french night. The soft smell of a bakery near by.  All that one could hope for was in a night like this. And as I came back from thought. I could see the corners of my room. holes, beaten and torn. Here I am, lying around. in this **** smelling rat den. Where some coke head chose to go round two with his *****.

When you read this do not do so till you know it by heart.
Do not take such rich words and condemn them to thoughtless actions.
Take each word with its bite in hand and eagerly call upon the beast.
That today was not granted to you but it was seized by you. The moment u decided to open your eyes today you signed a contract. You signed under the clause, "Today is mine, I will take it by the throat. If I am to live today then so be it, If I am to die then it shall be on my own accord. That the will demonstrated today will be the call to my self to resonate within the reflection of my own image. That I will stand up against all odds daring those who stand against me to not do so one by one time.
After all, What is the point of taking on the world, if you expect it to come at you one by one. Your faults will follow you as long as you ask for the handicap. That when you rise to the challenge others will be there to challenge. That the time to act is now. And now does not have a later. You stand at the top of a mountain others wish to own, It is not the competitive nature of life that makes this so but your undying will to carry your loved ones upon your shoulders. Be proud of yourself because sometimes no one will
If you can read this and speak it, Then do it no disrespect and roar!

don't say you'll always be there
don't say you'll always love me
Maybe i'm being crass but i'm sure
change is inevitable it's what is pure
You will sometime lack the means to save me
You will sometime change heart and flee me
I know the words you say are true and what you mean
There is nothing more lucid then when we change each scene
I know it to be true, inevitable even that at some point
we will part

Nothing would be better
Nothing could be more
That life of empty wine bottles
Rom comps on the tv
You nuzzled deep into my chest
arms around your waste
A filled living room couch
So drunk
Dreaming thoughts
of you, and you of me
So drunk

My mind spinning webs inside broken weaves.
My eyes full of black viscous blood.
I know no conscious, I know no filter.
Tonight?
That's alright.
I'm alone.
My head spins relentlessly on a dull point.
It's drunk poetry because it's satire of the personal self.
It's drunk poetry because tonight is the day I said no more.
the night I said,
relax... one more.
it draws me closer to a darkness I portray as the man  in the mirror.
The man that knows himself less than you think.
the boy that thinks himself less than you think
It draws me closer to being quartered by my own mind.
Relax... one more.
Relax
And that's all.
You light weight.

In space it"s nothing
A few shots this way
A few shots that way
The real difference between me and you?
is time

Angels flock to clouds so soft
keeping watch upon your soul
there they sit in the skies aloft
living life your only goal.
can you see what is in front of you?
Those eyes of yours so crystal blue.
an angel watches over you for endless time.
its music playing from a windless chime.
but as you know.
Even angels need to sleep.
So don’t worry.
so take that entrancing leap
eyes go blurry
now angel, you too can fall asleep.

I know no reason to stand still
No reason to sit down
excellence is never a matter of patience
Rather, initiative is the mother to excellence
Its father being practice
So I must practice each day
Never sit still
Never sit down
When life is your goal
Excellence is never a matter of patience

Your demons are not mine. But I do not mind.
Your triumphs are not mine. I do not mind.
Even the caustic rope that hangs your tormented mind.
These I have no ownership over.
But I will not stand idly as demons burn and scar your skin
I will not let your name go under rubble
I refuse to let you live a hangman's life.
I don't mind.

Between a father and his son
I've learned so much
To be courageous
To be strong
A man that I and others are proud of
So i deem myself Lion Heart
I've been taught that no one knows what they're doing
So invent a script for myself
When the going gets tough
Get ready for the brawl that comes with it
Love isnt something that comes by everyday
So cherish the ones you have because they might be gone
Today might be your last, So give someone something
To remember you by.
Its a shame I had to learn this
Without you...

This final day I write you.
My tragedy only to be statistic.
My thoughts malicious and sadistic.
I crave its emptiness more and more.

When strife matches love, as anger matches passion.
I sleep through  my painful recollections
before I take on water as cold as the reflection in the mirror.
Conscious but still dreaming.
Analyzing my dreaming
Understanding but not telling
Only for the sick pleasure of knowing.

Its time to wake up
Time to live my dreams
In a sick twist of fate
I cast aside feeling

I'm lost in a sea of my own troubles.
My family's picture grows blurry.
I lost my sense of direction.
its gone so soon like ashes in a flurry. my troubles are quadratic the weight it doubles. This life's enigmatic, the pressure it bubbles. Lost at sea without a paddle. A good god, godless, ripped from the saddle. I don't know why i put so much stock in make believe. Gee maybe i don't know, hopefully it'll be a dream That'll be conceived. Possibly ill received, because greatness is disbelieved, rarely achieved, grandma's dreams cleaved, All the children are ******* grieving. Deceiving our selves, packing the shelves, we're leaving.
Stop.
I have to find my bearing.
Stop.
The waters are cool. The wind is blowing softly.
Right now, just hold her hand.
Listen to the wind.

There's a gambit in every step you take
A cuff that came off when you raised the stake
What you left undefined
Your emotions unrefined
A step in the opposite direction leaves you friendless, powerless, and afraid
But you know your responsibilities, your job, you know what you do
You know that the only thing to change is you

Rip me in two
Make me Gemini
Throw me to the stars
Watch my light shine down
Let me lift you up
You are my star
You guide my way tonight

or not, I could care less if this went on
just give me the liberty of whats next
before I go on

As much as I want to give up
As much as I want to die
I can't
My goals are still unfinished
My dreams are still just fragments
The day they're finished
The moment they're complete
That's the moment I can die
That's the moment  I can rest