Twisted
and broken
Dancing
And limping
Your perfect puppet on strings,
Bowing
And
Bending
In time to your madness;
A tiny porcelain ballerina
Spinning on a pedestal,
As you orchestrate our final symphony.
My sweet,
Scary
Maestro of monsters,
My Conductor of Chaos
And pain,
I adore you-
My darlin,
My puddin.
Bleeding
and hopeful
Here I am,
Still,
By your side;
Your fondest hit
Your favorite toy to squeeze
(the life out of)
Your prisoner in love;
(Your good girl)
Begging for just a little more.
Heave me over the side
Again
Drown me in your molten insanity,
Push me under-
Just.
One.
More.
Time.
To feel the thrills,
The chills,
The danger;
The happiness
Of liberating manic laughter-
To feel the helpless despair
As I perform in your circus.
Here I am,
To beg a bullet
For these lips,
That praise your deeds,
And pray for release,
For a mutual destruction,
A final comedy written in blood.
I guess...
the joke is on me after all...
Right, Mr. J?

Twas a time
When once I knew
The scale and shape of things.
I knew what lay before me;
I knew my goals and dreams.
But now all is laid to ruin,
A change I could not predict;
So I'll make my bed tonight,
In standards derelict,
But think not on its squalor,
And instead be glad to be;
For I am but a story,
And there is more to see.
So
Shall I write a woeful ballad,
And mourn my frightful luck?
Shall I be so morose,
And into sorrow tuck
Myself and all my wishful thinking,
A hollow husk, once whole;
Shall I give in and linger on,
As time doth take its toll?
A more miserable thing
I could not express,
A fate most easily averted;
For happiness follows misery
And misery can be converted
Into iron will, and understanding,
Into change, where I emerge anew-
We are the only things we can command;
So why bottle up and stay blue?
Is it not better,
That once fallen down
To pick ourselves up
And stand on solid ground?
I will not be a burden,
But neither let my burdens bog me down;
Why should I give less power to a smile than a frown?
Nay, my story shall be one
Of determined resurrection -
Like the Phoenix I shall be soar-
Just in a different direction.
And thus learn in the process
Of being laid low
That I can fly,
That I can grow,
That limits are something that must be tested,
Not to be shelved, sheltered, and rested.
And in the end,
This tale is mine to tell-
Of making a heaven,
Having gone through hell.

Bubble, bubble
Floating by
Passing through
On the breath of a sigh
Bubble, bubble
I wonder why
You are so fragile
Yet climb so high
As if you are
Not an ounce afraid
Of the terrible price
That must be paid
Like Icarus
Too close to the sun
You know youll fall
As you come undone
But still you float,
Enchanting and free
Colorful and dainty,
Inspiring me
To soar to greater heights,
Come what may
To seek out new journeys
New trails and pathways
With no fear of the fall
That must inevitably come
Like you, darling bubbles,
I shall reach for the sun.
So please dearest dancers,
Show me the way,
I am ready to fly,
Today is my day.

I have loved the stars too fondly
To be fearful of the night
So with the sun I rise,
Awakened to the light
And though I sleep at sundown,
My precious strength to keep,
The stars are winking overhead
And tempting me from sleep.
They call me, laughing;
A quiet game of silver beams
Creeping oer my pillow
And suffusing all my dreams
With galaxies and novas,
And every thing between-
A milky way of inspiration
Flowing like a stream.
Unto these orbs of softened light
I call and whisper back,
A hopeful conversation
To pierce the midnight black
To sway the stars,
And keep them here-
These eternal companions
That change throughout the year-
Each day they fall with sunset,
Careful to return,
To vanquish the cruel sunrise
That pries and sneaks and burns;
To bring again a dreamland,
Such wondrous things to see-
Please stars, don't leave!
Stay here with me!
We'll dance
We'll play
We'll run through hill and Dale!
We'll laugh
We'll sing
We'll chase the comets tail!
Please don't leave, sweet stars
I'm not ready to wake up-
I have so much more to learn
And this taste is not enough.
But the sun is rising outside these silver halls,
And sometimes I forget
That dreams are never permanent -
At night, that's all we get-
A brief respite of sondrous wonder
While reaching for the stars
Before we wake,
And remember who we are.
But I am not afraid,
Night will come when the day does end-
For I have loved the stars too long
To be fearful of such friends.

It takes us to wither,
to weather,
To finally rest.
Wonders appear,
as we worsen,
to better,
Our scores on this test.
And to wit,
It is always played out of turn,
A game of cards turned to chance;
As we wend our willed way
Through life and romance.
When weary, we wander
And yet ask nothing new-
Wiping our worried wrinkles with care-
Hoping,
for just a few
Quiet minutes,
for us to stem and stew
As we hug our trappings,
And wipe our wrappings away-
To unwind,
decompressing-
At the end of our day.
Weird,
That the turmoil and tremors that threaten on the hour;
The problems compounding
The alarum bells sounding
The lessons resounding -
The things that turn our world sour;
That without these wild warfronts,
These savage frontiers,
We'd never be better,
And reap nothing from these years.
A quick, quiet musing
I present then,
in humble contemplation;
If we do not learn from change,
How then,
do we improve our station?

These things escape me,
The woes and ways of happiness;
I am lost to their charms,
To the agonies of bliss.
Through the years
I learned not to take
The hand of one
Whose heart would break
Before my own
And, in the process, lost
A gainful measure of the total cost.
For what is made better by a fight unresolved?
What is discovered by a puzzle not solved?
These thing and more
I have paid dearly to know;
Perhaps it is time for my knowledge to grow
And expand, not external
But deep down below
To find myself -
Am I the person I know?
What kind of flower can bloom just in the shade?
Is this love dead,
Or am I digging it's grave?
And do I feel shame,
For the time I have spared?
Does it feel wasted,
All these years that I shared?
Too many quandary's,
Too much I dont understand -
Too many tears,
As I let go of your hand.
Time breaks all things to dust,
Bogs things down with layers of rust;
This love was ours,
But now the veil is thinning;
This is the end,
And the beginning.

Wear on thine self
The mantle of Lover;
The guardian of Grace and good humour;
The protector of Peace and Prosperity.
Gird yourself with the armour of Amor,
Your helmet of Harmony shining proudly in the dawning light of morn;
And with gentle spirit,
Lift Compassion, your shield
And together wisely wield that sure sword called Understanding
To defend these shared dreams undivided,
And to promise in their pursuits,
To remember and revel in their shared
sacrifices,
To express their elated elocution of their expected eternity,
To selflessly strive to see the comfortable creation of their world free of worry
To count precious beyond compare
The pairing of two private hearts
Under the blessings of Chance and Choice.
Harken to these words,
That they might guide these two the same:
Fight with fearless ferocity
And protect thy good name.
Dance with undaunted delight,
Sleep with softened sighs;
Laugh with sunny smile,
See with open eyes.
For all the titles here
Shall ne'er compare
To keeping good company
With love to spare.