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The wind blows my paper away
just like you used to ******* away
Each day, I used to look forward to seeing you
Looking like you do, with eyes that twinkle the night sky of my life
Every night spent trying to decipher how your perfection came to be
That was until I fell asleep and woke up again to see
see that you were just an illusion
The fusion of our personalities created a chemical reaction
And, so fiercely, worse than a James Bond movie
But the difference is, this isn't a movie
This was the heart underneath my tee-shirt
How it was hurt and kicked in the dirt
and you just pretended you were fine
Even though you cry yourself to sleep at night, thinking of me, and what could've been the start of something great
When you wake up, you act as though you don't have a heart,
and you don't.
because it blew up into pieces along with mine
Yet, all we do is ignore each other and tell our friends "I'm Fine"
And one day, I'll be out dining with the family you didn't have with me
Seeing you across the many tables,
I'll raise my glass and nod my head
You'll do the same
Although I said nothing to you, both of us knew
and, slowly, I felt my heart grow back in my chest
4-9-2015
 May 2015 Bipolar Hypocrite
K
Today,
We                                                     are                                                             like
                       these                                                     words
apart                                              discrete­                                                   isolated

and the only thing that we can bring each other back
is to eliminate the spaces in between.
I want
to be written about.
Immortalised
in the scrawling of
a pining boy’s
pen.

Encased, no,
enshrined
in verses of
a stars-for-eyes
poet.

Enwreathed
in flowers of
words that
a hopeless romantic waters
everyday.

Is it
much
too much
to ask?
And every night
she unhooks the
stars
to string them
'round her neck.

She can't decide
if she's making a
noose
or she's making
a necklace.
Late night thoughts.
I like to do those quizzes
in glossy bubbles that you
find
in Cosmopolitan and
Elle and
Seventeen.

Which girl should I be?

Should I
dump paper flowers
on my milkmaid braid?
Long skirts, long chains, and
Beatles on my radio
during their ‘Indian’ phase?

Should I
paint it all
black, strip life down to
a *******,
blare punk at full
scream,
and cram my toes in ratty Docs,
smash all emotion
into smithereens?

Should I
sugar-coat my mouth with
Maybelline, button up
collars, laughs, opinions,
read books on behaving
just like a
daydream,
sip teas, bake cookies, aim for
Ivy Leagues?

Which gilded box do I crawl
into?
Which skin to don
this week?
Which fashion editor-friendly
stereotype to fulfil?

Which girl should I be?
It's the awkwardness and strangeness and
slugging-in-time-ness
of discovering a new
person.
Too often, movies portray the meeting of the
protagonists as some
heady rush or a
whirlwind of sparks or some
******* like that.
In reality, it's a slow fire
laboriously
begun with two
sticks.

And sometimes that fire never even starts.
Sick of cheesy rom-coms even though they make me cry.
Come here.
Let’s.
Let’s?
Let’s…
Let’s.

Come here.
Listen to Edith Piaf
(So hipster, n'est-ce pas?)
and the scratch of her
voice on the turntable,
will be ours
to keep in Moleskine
notebooks of memory.
So that we’ll try to believe,
love is actually a thing.
Let’s.

Come here.
This quaint room will be
ours,
our guest, as we breathe life
into the coffee cups, wooden chairs.
We’ll give it a nose, yes.
Lightbulbs will smell red
wine in fingerprinted glasses.
Windows will drink
us,
to us.
And we’ll laugh, our faces
hot and sad, mouths
crammed with French
fries.
A scene blurred with happiness.
Let’s.

Come here.
Trash the hands of every
boy, who’s spread himself
out on marginalia of our days.
Slathered himself on pieces
of time we wish we had hugged to ourselves.
Hate, hate, hate
him, we’ll say.
And his **** hands.
Let’s.

Come here.
Our eyes will be fireflies
behind our glasses,
in this cinema’s night, as we ‘swoon’
at rom-coms as buttery
as the popcorn we bought in the interval.
Life’s too short, we say.
Eat about it, drink about it,
maybe even talk about it.
Forget about it.
Let’s.

Come here.
Talk, about nothing.
We’ll all be dead one day.
Let’s.

Come here.
We can be friends.
Let’s.

Let’s.
Let’s.
Let’s?


(And your giggle will end
all and every verse written.
I’m **** sure of it.)
About my lovely, lovely friend who also writes lovely, lovely poetry.
 May 2015 Bipolar Hypocrite
anon
You should be here with me
My heart is as empty as the side of the bed that you used to sleep on
And my life's crashing harder than the waves on the shore like when you first kissed me
And I'm falling harder and faster into loneliness than I was when I fell for you
And I know there's no stopping this
But you should be next to me
Kissing each freckle on my arm and tracing "I love you" into my palm because each letter deserved it's own recognition for it made up a larger picture
And you should be next to me
With my head leaning onto the very shoulder I spent entire nights crying into
You should be beside me
But I guess this was all besides the point
And now you're next in line for a new girl
I just wish you would give me a next chance
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