Poets are liars.
We are never honest and even if we seem to be honest and raw,
We are not.
We are selfish and egotistic and make ourselves out to be victims.
We only write about what hurts us.
We write about our pain and suffering.
On top of that, we blame it on the lovers after lovers that have gone wrong.
You've already read it a thousand times,
The story of a how a person broke our hearts and tricked our innocent minds.
However, what we never write about is the hearts we break and the pain we cause.
I am not as innocent as I've made myself seem in my poems.
Yes, I fall in love with fools and they break my heart every time,
But sometimes I wonder if it’s just what I deserve.

Let me tell you about this girl,
There’s been a girl willing to set herself on fire for me but I handed her the matches and left…
I never saw the beauty of her flame burning for me.
I’m cold now without anyone to warm me.

Oh God, there was this girl who I let starve because I thought she had already ate too much.
I didn't want to be another bittersweet revenge on her plate…
Only to find out that she was honestly hungry for the love she thought I could give her.
I've read her cooking books,
She makes sweets for an honest guy now.
And now I’m the one who’s hungry.

And oh, there was a girl with a broken heart but with strong mind that wanted to touch me.
I thought I was too opulent for her ***** soul.
Later on I found out she had mines of gold and diamonds running through her thoughts.

I've hurt a lot of people.
I've hurt them the way this girl is hurting me.
And now I am screaming for forgiveness.
I've been so ruthless with their good hearts.
I am down on my knees begging the ghosts to stop haunting me every time I try again.

I’m a liar.

I'm afraid to be alone.
I'm afraid to be forgotten.
I'm afraid to let you in.
Because my trust is rotten.

I'm afraid I want you here.
I'm afraid I hope you'll stay.
I'm afraid to open up.
Because I know you'll go away.

I'm afraid I'm already hurt.
I'm afraid I did this to myself.
I'm afraid no one will ever stay.
Because all I seem to do is repel.

I'm afraid to ask how you feel.
I'm afraid that I already know.
I'm afraid I don't mean much.
So I guess I'll let you go.

Please don't worry when I'm alone
But please remember my name.
I hope you enjoyed your stay.
I'm afraid I knew you'd leave from the first day.

I’m terrified.

Life is coming at me faster than radio signals escaping the sun,
And I can't seem to make sense of the frequencies.
I want to move on,
I want to leave,
I want to grow,
But I'm Terrified.

What am I leaving behind?
What happens if I stay?
What happens if I leave?
Who won't I meet if I stay?
Who won't I meet if I leave?
I’m Terrified.

This whole life,
This whole world,
Is mine for the taking.
I’m going into it alone,
I've never felt more claustrophobic.
I've never been more hesitant.
Everything’s alright,

And I’m terrified.

I wonder if Icarus knew how close to the sun he came before his undoing fell upon him.
Was he so captivated by the beauty of the sun that he could not change his ways?
Trapped by the freedom his wings gave him, like a moth to a flame was he destined to burn?

I wonder if he failed only because his wings were formed from feathers and wax.
Was his freedom formed from illusions and wax?
Would the outcome have been different if his wings were not faux?

I wonder if the sea tried to save him.
Did the waves try to extinguish his flames and cool his melting wax?
Did the ocean ensure his fate by trying to help?

I wonder if it was hubris that was his downfall.
Was it his pride that catalyzed his failure?
Was it simply an account of failed ambitions?

I wonder if it could have been different.
Was he foreordained to fail?
Would the sea have swallowed him had he not flown too close to the sun?

I wonder if he was ever free at all.
Did the sun capture him the second his wings freed him from the ground?
Did Icarus know how close “too close” was?

And maybe that's my curse,
      I still trust people.
Instantly.

  From the moment we first met
      I trusted you.
Instantly.

  I get so impatient sometimes
      Waiting for what I give
Instantly.

  And I forget that for some,
      Trust isn't given
Instantly.

  But once I gain your trust
      The wait will be worth it.
Instantly.

I've found an infinity between comparison and reality;
A gap between everything and nothingness,
A dream between being asleep and lucid,
A time between now and forever.

I've found an escape between chaos and logic;
A note between two keys,
A word between two sentences,
A color between two hues.

I've found a void deprived of emptiness;
A space between comfort and accord,
A spark between flames,
A forest between the soil and seeds.

I've found a sanctuary between time and erosion;
A point between here and now,
A peace between me and everything,
A monument between decay and permanence.

I've found an Interim.