One day
we might
meet again,
you may
not remember me
but I’ll never
forget you.
Until then
when I
need you
I’ll keep you
hidden away
so no one
can touch you
In the back
of my mind
somewhere
where I know
you’ll be
safe and sound

I’m done with this writing
I keep aiming for perfection
I used to be smiling
Now it’s become an obsession

Back then
I never realised
How young I really was
And today,
I still don’t

Pour another glass
Another whiskey chaser
For the drinker
Mr bartender
On this late week day afternoon
One more no more
He shouts!
Banging his head against the bar
In a dying thirsty rage
Can somebody
Anybody
Phone his poor wife
Just to hear her breakdown again

To see your face
To feel your skin
To hear your voice
With a tear
I listen out
In this empty place

You never know
how lonely
you really are
until
your on your own

Fight or flight-
That’s what they say, right?
Say what you like
While the skin is pale
Throughout the day and night
Like a fresh clean sheet -
Crispy and white
Yes, you have guessed-
Anxiety and stress,
Adhd and my Aspergers
Smothers me tightly
Never gently or lightly
I hear the wind
In the leaves
As darkness
Covers my eyes
The most caressing breeze
Takes me down to the floor
Straight to my knees

Parents are the most peculiar things,
You think you’re really close
Yet really you are so far apart

She loves me
she loves me not,
She breaks my heart
she knows the spot

All the mistakes
I’ve made
I preformed
perfectly

To stop it all
from happening,
just
stop
thinking!

Why do I feel a failure
When I prefer to be a sailor,
A loner, a lost ghost,
A captain of a ship
I pray I live in hope
My last words won’t ever slip
I dream yet still learn
Your tender touch I mustn’t yearn
I laugh outside,
But cry hard inside
Like a loud ringing bell
You will never know I live in hell
Every tear drop I weep
I’m able to wash down
Every sidewalk, alley,
Even the dingiest street
Now, I mustn’t go astray
If I was to say
I saw my mum asleep
Also thought it would be
The last time we’d ever meet

In the end
your
words
didn’t matter
however
your last look
hurt
the most

I often wonder
do you think of me
like I think of you,
dare I say it,
do you ever miss me
like I miss you,
and if you do,
if it’s true
either way
I’m so deeply sorry
for what I’ve done to you

Your sorry for me,
I’m sorry for you
for having someone like me

don’t be afraid
when you see me this way
I don’t want to stay
just be with me
on my very last day

Today I’m in heaven
Yesterday I was with you
Tomorrow I’ll go to hell
After knowing what you do

I do not want to live  
  Unfortunately    
  I have lost the will to die

Moments
Make up a day
But it only takes
One moment
To turn your life
In a completely
Different way

Tier 1
Tier 2
Tier 3
(Tear) 4
What’s next
I can’t take anymore

It’s easier to stay lost in a memory
Rather than to face reality

I’m sorry
that day I stopped by
I’m sorry
You caught my eye
I’m sorry
I didn’t let you fly
I’m sorry
I came back to try
even when your bother
asked me why
And I’m sorry
I didn’t leave you alone
just to say goodbye

God
Please give me the words
To numb this pain

It’s easier when one says
Than when one feels

News flash!
Just had the vaccine
O(%\h:#$
No
;>{<%¥•v£
Side effects
/“€^+\<5
Feel
Great!!

There hasn’t been a single day
Where I haven’t been thinking
Of you in some way

You were once
so young
Yet I never saw
what was coming

God will only give you
What you can handle