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zebra Feb 2017
forgive me my darling
hollow beauty
but seeing you so gaunt
with
sunken dark eyes
and skin like gray soap
makes me feel
your easily breakable
already so close to death
my **** could crack your pelvis
and bird delicate ribs

inspired skeleton dancing
your body exclaims to all
a sensual exhibition
of slow suicide
my bloodless blossom
brave breatharian
your favorite math
subtraction
by multiplied
delicious starvations

you may need a strong man
deaths final instrument
who will love you
with tender crushes
darkly ******

come naked
spread wide my lovely grotesque
nestle in my arms
coffins embrace
to be bruised
while tremulously kissed
i will turn you to crumbles and powder
to finish sweetly
what you have started so long ago
My poems remain explorations of the subconscious ******
If i where a film maker or a novelist  you  would see me telling a story, not judge me, although i admit to my paraphilias  
These poems  are lunar anamorphic streams of consciousness from the deep chaotic subterranean glitz of transgressive  impulses we all share
Read them if you dare...You might find that part of yourself that you don't want you to know about and then again  you may feel more complete some how if you do....I always loved that dark thing that sleeps with in me
My tears are like the quiet drift
Of petals from some magic rose;
And all my grief flows from the rift
Of unremembered skies and snows.

I think, that if I touched the earth,
It would crumble;
It is so sad and beautiful,
So tremulously like a dream.
Her scarf a la Bardot,
In suede flats for the walk,
She came with me one evening
For air and friendly talk.
We crossed the quiet river,
Took the embankment walk.

Traffic holding its breath,
Sky a tense diaphragm:
Dusk hung like a backcloth
That shook where a swan swam,
Tremulous as a hawk
Hanging deadly, calm.

A vacuum of need
Collapsed each hunting heart
But tremulously we held
As hawk and prey apart,
Preserved classic decorum,
Deployed our talk with art.

Our Juvenilia
Had taught us both to wait,
Not to publish feeling
And regret it all too late -
Mushroom loves already
Had puffed and burst in hate.

So, chary and excited,
As a thrush linked on a hawk,
We thrilled to the March twilight
With nervous childish talk:
Still waters running deep
Along the embankment walk.
avalon Aug 2017
one more time, she whispers,
she whispers violently, tremulously, like an addict whispers
to the fingernail marks in her skin, like persephone whispers to pomegranate seeds, like sin, and her whispers collect on dollar bills in the wind, and the money flies home but she's still sitting in that bin,

wondering if Hades ever regretted his win
[Greek: Mellonta  sauta’]

These things are in the future.

Sophocles—’Antig.’

‘Una.’

“Born again?”

‘Monos.’

Yes, fairest and best beloved Una, “born again.” These were
the words upon whose mystical meaning I had so long
pondered, rejecting the explanations of the priesthood,
until Death itself resolved for me the secret.

‘Una.’

Death!

‘Monos.’

How strangely, sweet Una, you echo my words! I
observe, too, a vacillation in your step, a joyous
inquietude in your eyes. You are confused and oppressed by
the majestic novelty of the Life Eternal. Yes, it was of
Death I spoke. And here how singularly sounds that word
which of old was wont to bring terror to all hearts,
throwing a mildew upon all pleasures!

‘Una.’

Ah, Death, the spectre which sate at all feasts! How often,
Monos, did we lose ourselves in speculations upon its
nature! How mysteriously did it act as a check to human
bliss, saying unto it, “thus far, and no farther!” That
earnest mutual love, my own Monos, which burned within our
bosoms, how vainly did we flatter ourselves, feeling happy
in its first upspringing that our happiness would strengthen
with its strength! Alas, as it grew, so grew in our hearts
the dread of that evil hour which was hurrying to separate
us forever! Thus in time it became painful to love. Hate
would have been mercy then.

‘Monos’.

Speak not here of these griefs, dear Una—mine, mine
forever now!

‘Una’.

But the memory of past sorrow, is it not present joy? I have
much to say yet of the things which have been. Above all, I
burn to know the incidents of your own passage through the
dark Valley and Shadow.

‘Monos’.

And when did the radiant Una ask anything of her Monos in
vain? I will be minute in relating all, but at what point
shall the weird narrative begin?

‘Una’.

At what point?

‘Monos’.

You have said.

‘Una’.

Monos, I comprehend you. In Death we have both learned the
propensity of man to define the indefinable. I will not say,
then, commence with the moment of life’s cessation—but
commence with that sad, sad instant when, the fever having
abandoned you, you sank into a breathless and motionless
torpor, and I pressed down your pallid eyelids with the
passionate fingers of love.

‘Monos’.

One word first, my Una, in regard to man’s general condition
at this epoch. You will remember that one or two of the wise
among our forefathers—wise in fact, although not in
the world’s esteem—had ventured to doubt the propriety
of the term “improvement,” as applied to the progress of our
civilization. There were periods in each of the five or six
centuries immediately preceding our dissolution when arose
some vigorous intellect, boldly contending for those
principles whose truth appears now, to our disenfranchised
reason, so utterly obvious —principles which should
have taught our race to submit to the guidance of the
natural laws rather than attempt their control. At long
intervals some master-minds appeared, looking upon each
advance in practical science as a retrogradation in the true
utility. Occasionally the poetic intellect—that
intellect which we now feel to have been the most exalted of
all—since those truths which to us were of the most
enduring importance could only be reached by that analogy
which speaks in proof-tones to the imagination alone,
and to the unaided reason bears no weight—occasionally
did this poetic intellect proceed a step farther in the
evolving of the vague idea of the philosophic, and find in
the mystic parable that tells of the tree of knowledge, and
of its forbidden fruit, death-producing, a distinct
intimation that knowledge was not meet for man in the infant
condition of his soul. And these men—the poets—
living and perishing amid the scorn of the
“utilitarians”—of rough pedants, who arrogated to
themselves a title which could have been properly applied
only to the scorned—these men, the poets, pondered
piningly, yet not unwisely, upon the ancient days when our
wants were not more simple than our enjoyments were
keen—days when mirth was a word unknown, so
solemnly deep-toned was happiness—holy, august, and
blissful days, blue rivers ran undammed, between hills
unhewn, into far forest solitudes, primeval, odorous, and
unexplored. Yet these noble exceptions from the general
misrule served but to strengthen it by opposition. Alas! we
had fallen upon the most evil of all our evil days. The
great “movement”—that was the cant term—went on:
a diseased commotion, moral and physical. Art—the
Arts—arose supreme, and once enthroned, cast chains
upon the intellect which had elevated them to power. Man,
because he could not but acknowledge the majesty of Nature,
fell into childish exultation at his acquired and still-
increasing dominion over her elements. Even while he stalked
a God in his own fancy, an infantine imbecility came over
him. As might be supposed from the origin of his disorder,
he grew infected with system, and with abstraction. He
enwrapped himself in generalities. Among other odd ideas,
that of universal equality gained ground; and in the face of
analogy and of God—in despite of the loud warning
voice of the laws of gradation so visibly pervading
all things in Earth and Heaven—wild attempts at an
omniprevalent Democracy were made. Yet this evil sprang
necessarily from the leading evil, Knowledge. Man could not
both know and succumb. Meantime huge smoking cities arose,
innumerable. Green leaves shrank before the hot breath of
furnaces. The fair face of Nature was deformed as with the
ravages of some loathsome disease. And methinks, sweet Una,
even our slumbering sense of the forced and of the far-
fetched might have arrested us here. But now it appears that
we had worked out our own destruction in the ******* of
our taste, or rather in the blind neglect of its
culture in the schools. For, in truth, it was at this crisis
that taste alone—that faculty which, holding a middle
position between the pure intellect and the moral sense,
could never safely have been disregarded—it was now
that taste alone could have led us gently back to Beauty, to
Nature, and to Life. But alas for the pure contemplative
spirit and majestic intuition of Plato! Alas for the [Greek:
mousichae]  which he justly regarded as an all-sufficient
education for the soul! Alas for him and for it!—since
both were most desperately needed, when both were most
entirely forgotten or despised. Pascal, a philosopher whom
we both love, has said, how truly!—”Que tout notre
raisonnement se reduit a ceder au sentiment;” and it is
not impossible that the sentiment of the natural, had time
permitted it, would have regained its old ascendency over
the harsh mathematical reason of the schools. But this thing
was not to be. Prematurely induced by intemperance of
knowledge, the old age of the world drew near. This the mass
of mankind saw not, or, living lustily although unhappily,
affected not to see. But, for myself, the Earth’s records
had taught me to look for widest ruin as the price of
highest civilization. I had imbibed a prescience of our Fate
from comparison of China the simple and enduring, with
Assyria the architect, with Egypt the astrologer, with
Nubia, more crafty than either, the turbulent mother of all
Arts. In the history of these regions I met with a ray from
the Future. The individual artificialities of the three
latter were local diseases of the Earth, and in their
individual overthrows we had seen local remedies applied;
but for the infected world at large I could anticipate no
regeneration save in death. That man, as a race, should not
become extinct, I saw that he must be “born again.”

And now it was, fairest and dearest, that we wrapped our
spirits, daily, in dreams. Now it was that, in twilight, we
discoursed of the days to come, when the Art-scarred surface
of the Earth, having undergone that purification which alone
could efface its rectangular obscenities, should clothe
itself anew in the verdure and the mountain-slopes and the
smiling waters of Paradise, and be rendered at length a fit
dwelling-place for man:—for man the
Death-purged—for man to whose now exalted intellect
there should be poison in knowledge no more—for the
redeemed, regenerated, blissful, and now immortal, but still
for the material, man.

‘Una’.

Well do I remember these conversations, dear Monos; but the
epoch of the fiery overthrow was not so near at hand as we
believed, and as the corruption you indicate did surely
warrant us in believing. Men lived; and died individually.
You yourself sickened, and passed into the grave; and
thither your constant Una speedily followed you. And though
the century which has since elapsed, and whose conclusion
brings up together once more, tortured our slumbering senses
with no impatience of duration, yet my Monos, it was a
century still.

‘Monos’.

Say, rather, a point in the vague infinity. Unquestionably,
it was in the Earth’s dotage that I died. Wearied at heart
with anxieties which had their origin in the general turmoil
and decay, I succumbed to the fierce fever. After some few
days of pain, and many of dreamy delirium replete with
ecstasy, the manifestations of which you mistook for pain,
while I longed but was impotent to undeceive you—after
some days there came upon me, as you have said, a breathless
and motionless torpor; and this was termed Death by
those who stood around me.

Words are vague things. My condition did not deprive me of
sentience. It appeared to me not greatly dissimilar to the
extreme quiescence of him, who, having slumbered long and
profoundly, lying motionless and fully prostrate in a mid-
summer noon, begins to steal slowly back into consciousness,
through the mere sufficiency of his sleep, and without being
awakened by external disturbances.

I breathed no longer. The pulses were still. The heart had
ceased to beat. Volition had not departed, but was
powerless. The senses were unusually active, although
eccentrically so—assuming often each other’s functions
at random. The taste and the smell were inextricably
confounded, and became one sentiment, abnormal and intense.
The rose-water with which your tenderness had moistened my
lips to the last, affected me with sweet fancies of
flowers—fantastic flowers, far more lovely than any of
the old Earth, but whose prototypes we have here blooming
around us. The eye-lids, transparent and bloodless, offered
no complete impediment to vision. As volition was in
abeyance, the ***** could not roll in their sockets—
but all objects within the range of the visual hemisphere
were seen with more or less distinctness; the rays which
fell upon the external retina, or into the corner of the
eye, producing a more vivid effect than those which struck
the front or interior surface. Yet, in the former instance,
this effect was so far anomalous that I appreciated it only
as sound—sound sweet or discordant as the
matters presenting themselves at my side were light or dark
in shade—curved or angular in outline. The hearing, at
the same time, although excited in degree, was not irregular
in action—estimating real sounds with an extravagance
of precision, not less than of sensibility. Touch had
undergone a modification more peculiar. Its impressions were
tardily received, but pertinaciously retained, and resulted
always in the highest physical pleasure. Thus the pressure
of your sweet fingers upon my eyelids, at first only
recognized through vision, at length, long after their
removal, filled my whole being with a sensual delight
immeasurable. I say with a sensual delight. All my
perceptions were purely sensual. The materials furnished the
passive brain by the senses were not in the least degree
wrought into shape by the deceased understanding. Of pain
there was some little; of pleasure there was much; but of
moral pain or pleasure none at all. Thus your wild sobs
floated into my ear with all their mournful cadences, and
were appreciated in their every variation of sad tone; but
they were soft musical sounds and no more; they conveyed to
the extinct reason no intimation of the sorrows which gave
them birth; while large and constant tears which fell upon
my face, telling the bystanders of a heart which broke,
thrilled every fibre of my frame with ecstasy alone. And
this was in truth the Death of which these bystanders
spoke reverently, in low whispers—you, sweet Una,
gaspingly, with loud cries.

They attired me for the coffin—three or four dark
figures which flitted busily to and fro. As these crossed
the direct line of my vision they affected me as forms;
but upon passing to my side their images impressed me
with the idea of shrieks, groans, and, other dismal
expressions of terror, of horror, or of woe. You alone,
habited in a white robe, passed in all directions musically
about.

The day waned; and, as its light faded away, I became
possessed by a vague uneasiness—an anxiety such as the
sleeper feels when sad real sounds fall continuously within
his ear—low distant bell-tones, solemn, at long but
equal intervals, and commingling with melancholy dreams.
Night arrived; and with its shadows a heavy discomfort. It
oppressed my limbs with the oppression of some dull weight,
and was palpable. There was also a moaning sound, not unlike
the distant reverberation of surf, but more continuous,
which, beginning with the first twilight, had grown in
strength with the darkness. Suddenly lights were brought
into the rooms, and this reverberation became forthwith
interrupted into frequent unequal bursts of the same sound,
but less dreary and less distinct. The ponderous oppression
was in a great measure relieved; and, issuing from the flame
of each lamp (for there were many), there flowed unbrokenly
into my ears a strain of melodious monotone. And when now,
dear Una, approaching the bed upon which I lay outstretched,
you sat gently by my side, breathing odor from your sweet
lips, and pressing them upon my brow, there arose
tremulously within my *****, and mingling with the merely
physical sensations which circumstances had called forth, a
something akin to sentiment itself—a feeling that,
half appreciating, half responded to your earnest love and
sorrow; but this feeling took no root in the pulseless
heart, and seemed indeed rather a shadow than a reality, and
faded quickly away, first into extreme quiescence, and then
into a purely sensual pleasure as before.

And now, from the wreck and the chaos of the usual senses,
there appeared to have arisen within me a sixth, all
perfect. In its exercise I found a wild delight—yet a
delight still physical, inasmuch as the understanding had in
it no part. Motion in the animal frame had fully ceased. No
muscle quivered; no nerve thrilled; no artery throbbed. But
there seemed to have sprung up in the brain that of
which no words could convey to the merely human intelligence
even an indistinct conception. Let me term it a mental
pendulous pulsation. It was the moral embodiment of man’s
abstract idea of Time. By the absolute equalization
of this movement—or of such as this—had the
cycles of the firmamental orbs themselves been adjusted. By
its aid I measured the irregularities of the clock upon the
mantel, and of the watches of the attendants. Their tickings
came sonorously to my ears. The slightest deviations from
the true proportion—and these deviations were
omniprevalent—affected me just as violations of
abstract truth were wont on earth to affect the moral sense.
Although no two of the timepieces in the chamber struck the
individual seconds accurately together, yet I had no
difficulty in holding steadily in mind the tones, and the
respective momentary errors of each. And this—this
keen, perfect self-existing sentiment of
duration—this sentiment existing (as man could
not possibly have conceived it to exist) independently of
any succession of events—this idea—this sixth
sense, upspringing from the ashes of the rest, was the first
obvious and certain step of the intemporal soul upon the
threshold of the temporal eternity.

It was midnight; and you still sat by my side. All others
had departed from the chamber of Death. They had deposited
me in the coffin. The lamps burned flickeringly; for this I
knew by the tremulousness of the monotonous strains. But
suddenly these strains diminished in distinctness and in
volume. Finally they ceased. The perfume in my nostrils died
aw
zebra May 2017
are you my lover
in a dark heaven
come to me my beloved
kneel at my feet
naked
as i penetrate your veil
that shrouds cryptic ravenous ardor
and ask of me
your hearts desire

dissolution you say
that i may be eternal
for loves sake
bowing at the knees
as you tremulously brush and sweep your fragrant  hair
over my thighs
and run your pink tongue across
my butter filled velvet sheath
our kisses will be born over and over again
a spinning ring of desire

are there not the debts of love
will you promise not to anguish to much
as one harm heaps upon another
you swear to give yourself fully
thrill to kisses crepuscular
aching to be bitten and bitten
and bitten through
your scent
blood perfume

everything about you excites me
long stretches in a stained white gown
wet summer fruit
and spilling seed
your body filled with waters mellifluent
and lush
yield unto me
you are a titillating voluptuous awe
Palisades
of wild torments
dancing on a floor
that melts scorched feet
from
hallucinations invisible shadows
of burning witches *******

sweet girl incandescent
brooding
ridge pole bending
throat swollen parched
crude hair pulling
Medusa vipers in the grip of a god fist
loving you
with a hard drubbing
your all squeals and caresses
stay with me through the long night
of tender kisses and worship
and then prepare for release to paradise
shall it be fast
spiraling
will you spread wide
and plead
for all and more

what does it matter
fluttering with wild abandon
in the temple of rituals dark
to see you writhe
inviting ruin
we are a party of hydras
writing in blood and thunder
in the book of wonders

our hungers endless
Gods and Devils
thrill to our theater
of mortal coils unraveled
in the thick torture tuileries
of Dark Heaven
vircapio gale Oct 2013
i might continue on with that trauma
i might subside.
violation carries with it sensate boons of empathy
blue sky overrun with thanks
arched-back breath

you're afraid to ask me
are your tears painful
but i spear your question with a surplus love
shouting joy
as if there weren't a plea
tremulously groaned
share with me

it isn't just release
sweet freedom laughing out of doors
you and she regaled in bursts
iridescent meaning
hung in curve of lock
nape and open palm
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   Her scarf a la Bardot,
In suede flats for the walk,
She came with me one evening
For air and friendly talk.
We crossed the quiet river,
Took the embankment walk.

Traffic holding its breath,
Sky a tense diaphragm:
Dusk hung like a backcloth
That shook where a swan swam,
Tremulous as a hawk
Hanging deadly, calm.

A vacuum of need
Collapsed each hunting heart
But tremulously we held
As hawk and prey apart,
Preserved classic decorum,
Deployed our talk with art.

Our Juvenilia
Had taught us both to wait,
Not to publish feeling
And regret it all too late -
Mushroom loves already
Had puffed and burst in hate.

So, chary and excited,
As a thrush linked on a hawk,
We thrilled to the March twilight
With nervous childish talk:
Still waters running deep
Along the embankment walk.
Onoma Nov 2018
silence is

listening to

your star's

snowmelt...

tremulously visible

droplets.

descend as

prayers struck

between the

eyes.

envisioning.

to life.
Annabel Lee Aug 2014
I am a terrible dancer.
But for you I would dance,
I would twirl and spin and slide,
to whatever music you gave me
my clumsy clomping feet would suddenly
for a moment be graceful,
just for you.

I am a terrible singer.
But for one glance of your smile
I would climb each stumbling, soaring note
I would belt out my love for you
singing along to the radio in our car
tremulously letting song fill me,
just for you.

I am a terrible writer.
But I compose this poem out of
nothing but love for you
-- because I have nothing else --
and I'd rearrange the alphabet
a thousand times over
til it forms the words I want,
just so, on the page,
just for you.

I am a terrible artist.
But I would cut my heart and bleed
my love for you to paint with;
my body to be a sculpted statue
a monument of ******* and hips and desire
only for you.

I am a terrible lover.
But all I can say is that I try, with all my might
for you to know my love, feel my love
and not just when we are entangled in each other but
even when we walk side by side down the street,
when my fingers brush yours unexpectedly,
in the way you rub your eyes when you are tired
and the way you stare at me for so long I get uncomfortable,
saying, "I just like to look at you."

I see you and my love is
always for you, always with you,
a glow of me in all you do because
I am standing on this cliff edge and
it's too late, it's too late
I've given you all of me, and even if it
destroys me
there's no coming back

Everything I do, I do for you.
Roseanna H May 2013
I love you,
But,
you do not know it yet.

tremulously,
I sit by you,
greet you at a party,
push your glass of drink closer to you.

And sometimes my heart asks,
can i be closer to you?
Can i come over?
and we, us, ourselves, make things new?


We have been friends for so long.



I do not know,
how or when it started,
but this softening of my limbs,
this pinkening of lips,
this lowering of my dress,
comes more frequently now.

I do not remember,
when the blue green blue of your eyes became beautiful,
or your smile a magnet for my gaze
How when you indulge what I have to say my heart leaps,
dances,
chimes,
Then quietly puts itself away again.


You know me,
but I want you to know me like this.
I want you to know me in odds and ends
and under starlight or in warm sheets.

I want you to know me,
as I have started to know you.
Paul Kgaje Aug 2018
You behold a beast that lives inside your darkened mind,
You hold a creature that preys at darkest nights.
You go to sleep in sight but to sleep you shall never go,
Your raging spirit aches to swallow souls.
You are a killer.

The life you live, shaken, tremulously.
Demented souls  you devour meticulously.
The blood you sip from the skulls relentlessly.
Sins of joy, sins of joy.
You are a killer.

The poor children cry, the poor children cry.
You never hear but yet you listen.
You swallow swords; you swallow blades as the sun it shines.
You utter words of encouragement and hide your face from the light.
You are a killer.

You act as brave as the knights of Templar,
And slice your blade in a stranger.
You shape a world of delightfulness and stump on it.
You are a killer, you are a killer.
A poem about the bad things we do
PK Wakefield Nov 2011
i'll go almost creeping things

              and they'll be me

creep creeping rows of tiny
raising bumps(thoselittle
hairs climbing down your
tummy(almost no see 'em
hairs)but they catch softly
light in their trembling bodies
under my breathing breaths
(from the same mouth
                                tremendously
from that 1 mouth
                                 tremulously)

scoring twixt bunched petals
it creeps a hot gushing pallor
TheCity Sep 2013
hands shaking, you pack; tremulously, knees drawn in to your chest in in a way that suggests self defense
you are leaving because you can no longer stop yourself from drawing your sword, from cutting into him deeply, blade to bone

you have been here before you know that no one deserves this
PK Wakefield Jul 2010
h
the night came a lady,
swooning her opalescent skirt
on the vertebrae of the earth!
and the shingles of stars were
crusted on the velvet belly of her
thighs) between
              whom
              is
the fragrant notch of dawn;
a babe waiting crimson skin
to wail softly in the crevice of
darkness and come immortally
dieing every eve. resurrected
in her womb who did slay him.
anon the coming morn.

but should
i have a say i would say i love her more.
the night. she slanders upon and kisses
my tepid flesh, inviting my eyes to
glaze her still frame. she doth love
me well. and i too do love her. the angles
of her skin. and her cool hair. stretching
or whispered. an arch tremulously. desiring
my fingers.

she is wet. the night. hither little magic. i will love you.
Upon sight of my LOVE
You, must have skipped a heart-beat
and felt scared or happy?
Oh! LOVE - you must have said
How will I handle it
Is it true?
Or is it just a game?

Is it Death calling me?
I have waited for it everyday
Now it comes in this form
Is this what I dreamt of my LOVE?
And your heart skipped a last-time

What where you thinking
When such thoughts came to your mind?
By the way, LOVE is not the game of mind

Perhaps you wondered
That is the way LOVE always strikes
It does dear...
Without plan, without notice
It comes out like a flower,
under a rain-soaked earth
On morning you get up and
The flower of LOVE is there
In front of you

Perhaps you deplored the culture
That all LOVE means marriage...

Perhaps you cried thinking
What if I hurt and **** this LOVE?
That would be against all my grain of well-being
I am born to a religion that professes LOVE

Perhaps you confounded that
You can survive EVIL and SIN but not TRUE LOVE

Perhaps you yearned tremulously to plead
Yes, I seek LOVE, someone to LOVE me unconditionally
Once in my LIFE - Time

Perhaps you speculated
Whether this LOVE
is Romance or LUST
Without realizing it is
PURE TRUE LOVE!!

Perhaps you remembered faintly
Christ's message you were taught in church
"LOVE one another"

Perhaps you recalled with happiness
This is the prize one pays for seeking LOVE

Perhaps you were joyous -
that at last LOVE came to me
Uncalled, unchartered, uninvited...

Perhaps you felt some solace
That I am the chosen one
NOT all are blessed to be LOVED like this
UNCONDITIONALLY, PASSIONATELY, ETERNALLY

My prayer is but this:
Among all this "PERHAPS"
May you always know
It was GOD &/or FATE &/or NATURE
Whatever you want to call it
That Destined LOVE in your life.
Freedom lives in me.
Its within me, not within my madness.

Its within my capacity to imagine.

It’s in the sun-rays bathing my face,
and my naked, long, always beautyful legs,
-which the nurses how deny to cover them with a green
hospital robe-
in my capacity to take wise decisions; and to love.

In the capacity to free myself,
from all fear;
from all anger.

Freedom it’s been encaged;
wings *******,
closed eyes,
and been able to fly;
feel blood flow;
the voice run;
fly;
tremulously;
vividly;
running through my skin,
like a kite, of brilliant colors
trapped, inside my body.

Freedom it’s in close my
eyes and
listen the outline of my
lips,
and my kisses, sent to
nobody.

Its feel my thoughts,
stop
my own momentum.

The
freedom is fought against the manifest of madness.
Against
the feeling of be standing without anything under my feet.

Freedom is to fight for listen the silence.
The silence in the center of my thoughts.
In the hummingbirds, and the singing of the birds.

In all of that the freedom is hidden.

And noise that the typewriter of the shrink produces in the hall, dictating diagnose.
Generates the violent ravage of the madness, pounding each pounding.

And the freedom, over all, sleeps in the bed 14th,
where my refugee, my limb, and my salvation.
The one multiplied by itself;
infinite, like the aleph, I have tattooed next to my heart
The number 4,
like the four pillars oracle that defined the Greek destine, included mine.
On January the 28th I intern my self for 11 days on a psychiatric ward, for my disorder, this was the poetic result....
Onoma Oct 2016
Necro night, obsessive polish...
smooth as a piano's torso.
A man profanes the vested
interests of his body with starry
eyeshot.
Stuffing the pig of non being
with a star's nonlinear light.
The rapid fire vexations of a
king invade him, unspecified
bidding must be carried out.
He sees the world scurry,
sevitude's hand and foot--the
glutted pig of his non being
belches tremulously.
The horror of full emptiness
drives him from star to star, his
subjects multiply to appease
the royal malcontent.
He tears into curses cast at God,
the king blacks out.
The night sits encased in a man's
room, ants of darkness crawl on
him...he lets out a sigh...then begs
sleep.
Nat Lipstadt Apr 2023
they’ve tried to mechanize, machine tool, the kindness business,
since it seems that being kind is no longer intuitive, au naturel,
but you and I can still scratch off the genes rusted shut that
help the elderly who set out to cross the street knowing full well
20 seconds ain’t enough to make over four lanes with a gait that
don’t move giddy up no more, even with a walker or a cane

the city sidewalks are tremulously arrayed with cracks and rough,
mini sized rises, even small hillocks, that we rushabouts rate noticed
until we have been tripped up in a prior excursion in that same spot

a child once ran out of the park onto the avenue, looking distressed,
in a city that’s overloaded with risk and dangerous one doesn’t want to imagine, wife says “something’s wrong,” sure enough a dawdler,
walking home with her dad, looks up and he is not visible; panicked,
who knew that in an a city of millions, where separation is a hell lot wider than five degrees of separation, that she would know my children, and let me walk her home; the father of course, hunting for her in all the wrong places, I walk her home…the mother, semi-stunned, asks how she could ever thank us, was surprised at my answer…”When your husband returns home to confess his misdeed, having lost his child, just greet him without opprobrium and blame,
for he has already punished himself far worse than you ever could…”

it is in the small things that we acknowledge that we are more alike
than not, and we are knotted in a single strand in ways we cannot
always ken, and sometimes, do not want to acknowledge, for this
temple building business is not without risk, but surely it is a structure built of bricks of loving compassion, and essences of goodness, the small kindnesses in our blood cells, that all of us innately possess...
Small Kindnesses

By Danusha Laméris

I’ve been thinking about the way, when you walk
down a crowded aisle, people pull in their legs
to let you by. Or how strangers still say “bless you”
when someone sneezes, a leftover
from the Bubonic plague. “Don’t die,” we are saying.
And sometimes, when you spill lemons
from your grocery bag, someone else will help you
pick them up. Mostly, we don’t want to harm each other.
We want to be handed our cup of coffee hot,
and to say thank you to the person handing it. To smile
at them and for them to smile back. For the waitress
to call us honey when she sets down the bowl of clam chowder,
and for the driver in the red pick-up truck to let us pass.
We have so little of each other, now. So far
from tribe and fire. Only these brief moments of exchange.
What if they are the true dwelling of the holy, these
fleeting temples we make together when we say, “Here,
have my seat,” “Go ahead — you first,” “I like your hat.”

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/09/19/magazine/poem-small-kindnesses.html
Hasan Maruf Jul 2017
I…I heard the footstep
I…I wondered what…what was that?
I…I heard an indistinct rumble
I…I hastily desisted and urged me to rest
Until I heard the vicious whisper
Thundering behind my doorstep
Tremulously had I reached the door
Looking through the mirror conduit
I paused, gasped and breathed deep
What I heard was a staccato shriek
Bludgeoning violently against
My chamber door with a ghastly peep
Suddenly the sound dissipated awhile
But the fiendish murmur did beguile
Thrusting my heart into a pacific exile

It was an unearthly maiden from the yore
Causing me to tingle to hear her dark lore
In the night of my lone and lousy submission
I was metamorphosed into a ghost
Dissevering the soul from my dainty robe

I…I felt a flitting shudder then a flirting flutter
In the middle of a tormenting stutter
Before consummation with this maiden
Brewing out from the obscuration of her colour

I felt torrid phosphorescence on my forlorn bed
While, I envisioned specter of unhallowed dream
Forming like fungus inside my foamy stream
Overpowering the sputter of my night scheme

I...I thought for a while, the montage
Of these dreams must be from the arch evil
But soon the slumber began to feast
On my turbulent bliss, I reveled
At the very opportunity of unwinding
The gospel of her love forsaken Lenore
Laden with the riddle of her dark lore!

I…I lingered a little before lending my ear
To the haunted mysteries of the maiden’s air
I betook my bedraggled knife
Waited for what comes within my purview
Before engaging myself in a valorous view

Meanwhile, in my chamber of cadaverous blue
I noted a rotting odors passing by
In the hallway through my door
Suddenly, it was lit with translucent light
While, the horror tossed me into a grim plight
On the floor, I discovered a casket of a corpse
Irritably birthing the wild bubble of iced trill
It felt like a purring puff then it was all still

I decided to eavesdrop the rasping whimper
Gushing out from its muted shrill
I…I betook my bedraggled knife
More so to scan the harmony of his strife
Enough, enough I deplored wearily with delight
To get to open the portal of his hidden life

I ... I betook my bedraggled knife
I plowed it through his skin
Cautiously, I devised my amputation
With various degrees of incision
From its protoplasm up to chin
But, I could find nothing but meats
Muttering unrequited love
Lisping ominous yearning of his
To be reconciled and resigned with
Demoniacal feat of maiden’s heartbeat

I…I betook my bedraggled knife
Looking into my works, I could
Not thwart a languorous temptation
As the soft, serene and slow cadences
Of the maiden stirred me to waive
Into the vault of unmarked grave

She gave me my disheveled knife
An incandescent beauty I saw therein
Eyes open, shining like the moon
I decided to use my entire prowess within
Speculating my life to be ended soon

The maiden carried me along down the hallway
With the other corpses I am to dwell in all gay
In her livid *****, in her phantom palace of gray
I heard the chuckling corpse open his tongue
Singing all those songs which never were sung
I managed to utter my name with a rusted voice
Intimating that I won’t be alone and forever rejoice

The turbid night ended with a dusky dawn
Being bemused, my blood bedewed knife
Regaled at the sight of this phenomenon
[A horror poem]
B Sonia K Feb 2019
Loud and loud are my thoughts
And I am its prisoner
A rebel to myself
Drowning in waves of somersaulting waters
Surrounded by the salty taste of helplessness
In the abyss of overlapping voices
Booming tremulously
Silencing my willful spirit.
Steering me into a void

But that was before I realized,
I am in control of my thoughts
And only have to say two words

BE GONE!
Praggya Joshi Apr 2018
A slight ache in my chest
Becomes clearer and stronger
Whenever I see that distant look
Slowly spread in your almond shaped hazel eyes
And those scarlet lips
Shiver tremulously
As if struggling to hold
Those last bits of resilience
Threatening to fade into an abyss of oblivion
At that moment
all I really wish
Is to traverse the distance of your gaze
Climb upon that nameless horizon
Dive into the infinite darkness
That has wrenched your source of happiness
Ruthlessly devoured a prominent piece of you
And return back with a speck of hope
Anything that stirs your anticipation
relinquish your source of misery
Revive your languished faith
Makes you gather your shattered pieces
And wrap you in one of those embrace
That turns you sanguine and buoyant again
Cause no matter what I say
Something inside me fails to believe
That you will ever return
To how you used to be
Before this calamity fractured your resolve
Beyond repair
Monika Jan 2019
I have a smile on my face
and it feels right, too.
A smile so big it makes my cheeks hurt!
A smile I can’t erase
because you, because you, because you

I’m almost always sad
but I talk to you and the world seems brighter;
a world so bright it’s like walking on the sun.
Around you things never seem as bad,
and I feel like my body’s a lot lighter.
Because you, because you, because you

You only see me as a friend,
but I love you so dearly I
kiss you every morning in my mind’s eye.
And every night, I pull my sheets close to me
in crude imitations of your embrace.

Even so,
it really doesn’t matter to me
because the brightness of the world you’ve given me
lives in my body. Dimly, faintly it shines.
It’s you, it’s you, it’s you

The ember of the earth itself
has been placed in my beating heart,
thawing old permafrost wounds.
And thanks to its warmth, the old
buried seeds of my joy have been coaxed to growth.
Because of you, because of you, because of you

As my new feet take root
in the soil of my life, the light of
my love for you makes me a flower
that breathes the same warm, restoring
flame that I tremulously blew from the
ember you gave me.

It won’t matter
if all I have left someday
is an amber hued ashen ember, and
if the fire in my heart burns to nothing at all, or
even if I am lost to glowing light of the world.
It wouldn’t matter if the petals of the flower you turned me to
wilted and fell. Still all I had I would give you,
Because it’s you, because it’s you, because it’s you.
And maybe on that day, I would make you a living, fiery flower too.
this was about the boy i liked last summer
South City Lady Nov 2020
the sea wrinkles, extends
beneath her moon glow, awaiting
its lustrous return
keening with melancholy ache
of wave soaking midnight sands
unreflective as night's obsidian
hand - snakes along his features
casting a shadowed aura
across his liquid expanse
lulled into silent slumber

while the moon fore-sakes
her nightfall promise
stretched alongside
his ivory form, awakening
breathlessly, tremulously, he
discovers her as moonshine
on outstretched palms, bathing
in her resplendence

         was it all summer night's splendor,
         (quicksilver to his mind like the moon        
         beckoning his misbegotten sea)
         or had she - at last - returned
                to solace his lovesick dream?
Was she a metaphor or a goddess--no one knows, not even he.
Joshua R Wood Oct 2018
A voice that whispers to me
Tells me to push on and on, trusting even while she's gone
The voice has carried me easily over seas and travesties of greater turmoil
And as waters boil, waiting and watched, I am unscathed and joyful in the voice
It whispers like vespers on a breeze that frees my sometimes troubled mind
When memories and longings fade in like a tremulously beautiful din
Creating harmonies and dissonances that dance out of time
Out of time . . .
Timing, oh timing
How did you get away from me?
"It's okay," that voice whispers, knowing the events that lead to today
The sacrifice is sweeter and refinement's meaning deeper
When there is loss . . .
Loss . . .
To lose it all to gain it all within a fall before the fall
When greens fade and life's cycle trades for an escapade of reds and yellows
Color me rainbow, don't stop at yellow
Don't stop
Oh please, don't stop
So many more colors to discover, beyond clover greens and a prismatic sheen
That blended ecstatic its chromatic gleam
The voice was always pleased, yet it demanded we cross seas
Create distance, honoring all that was given to He
All that we give . . .
Give . . .
The voice brings peace, while insisting I not stop
"She has stopped," I plead, yet I know she still reads
Still seeks, which speaks in unison with that voice
To remember . . .
I set out to give it all, whether or not I stand or fall
I know she feels, I feel she is not fickle in her words or her decisions
Her actions not derision, nor her writings works of fiction
Where does this confounded belief and confidence come from?!?!
The voice that whispers reminds me that it led me here for a purpose
Like porpoises and endorphins, endolphins that swim through me
Invigorating and serene as I redefine this shape of a man
A man . . .
I attempt to be a good one, of sorts
And the voice never retorts at my efforts
He loves when I try
He loves when I fall
He loves when I fly
And through it all
When I succeed and give Him the glory
We shine together
Oh, how we shine together
So, dear reader
Here I am at peace
That voice the deepest part of me
The heart of me, the art in me
He is my reason - in every season
High or low, I always know He speaks to me in voices that whisper
I listen
And I act
I progress
And as I take these steps, certain memories linger with longing
He opens every door, and I want more - I will not settle for a life mundane
Nor will I give up on those that I love
For green reminds me
As He reminds me
To find that best version of myself.
A Mess of Words Mar 2020
And last,
there was Maria.

Her birth fell outside
the natural timeline of
all the rest of her family's affairs.

She may have called herself
'an accident.'

I could never make that connection.

She was the closest thing
to passion
I have ever known;
aside from childhood nights
beside an indifferent and well-fed fire.

She was terribly shy;

until she

tremulously

handed me (only one) of her keys.

[Alas
I wonder if it was ever
for the lock upon
her august heart.]

But she sang and she danced
and she ever approached me boldly.
She drew me out of myself
and brought me to wonder.

She even whispered with passion,

daring to share with me
her stately dreams.

And it goes without saying
(though I'll write it and lament)
she kissed with such passion.

She was above and beyond
any other girl I ever loved (...few)

Indeed,
I loved her.

I loved her,

almost enough.
This is not what I'd call a poem. It is rather a lament, during this time of crisis, to remind myself that I once cared for someone of great worth. This was also written without editing. Feel free to not send me any critiques.

(passion in this writing is rather of joie de vivre than of lust)

— The End —