For you, my love
I went to a bird market
And I bought a bird
For you
My love
I went to a flower market
And I bought a flower
For you
My love
I went to a junk market
And I bought a chain
A heavey chain
For you
My love
And I went to a slave market
And I searched for you
But I couldn't find you anywhere
My love

One life by flames a Hero made

This just became a lot harder by its very nature I must cloak one identity shine all the light I can on the
Other harder because I was just reminded people find my writing hard to understand brothers at church
Out home can you be more simple use smaller words I could be stupid I’m a high school dropout I don’t
Know any big words well I did use imbecile in the seventh grade that was cool and got a reaction this
Started to be a tribute to a person who was rare although you can surely see glimpses of your dad
Brother or other male members of your family as I said to write you must follow truth strictly no
Deviation but before I could pay and honor the visible one another comes into view from the past with
This twist then he was the dark kight now he is a knight in shining armor the dark knight have him on
The Cross bar of a bicycle both of you have swimming trunks on you pass some tuffs with extra powerful
BB guns while your body shields him he lets off a litany of sailor inspired words directed at them they
Don’t return insults they open fire I have welts and his mother picks three B Bees out of my back did he
Feel any pain he was too busy laughing that was just one time not enough room here to give you the run
Down let’s just say as the only identifier he was a short racer came in first braver than the others but I
saw him in a class picture there is the strange part it touched my heart and then speaking to him on the
Phone my feelings were correct he is a great wonderful person then the stranger yet he so embodies by
Appearance and voice of the one I choose to honor here Stevie Rucker was about eleven that summer I
Met him his mother went to my wife’s church he was bright kind and melted people with his soft and
loving nature quite a contrast to his father a six foot four hard nose FFA inspector we were out at a
Restaurant in the city a foursome in the next room with a booth were using foul language I don’t know
The dim lighting could have been a factor but when this giant shadow fell on them and asks them to stop I
Don’t think they even talked loud after that. But this sweet little boy harbored a dream one day he was
Going to be a fire fighter then as dreams go it was shattered bad eye sight disqualified it was a dream
Worth fighting for so he took action a risky costly eye operation was the answer victory he moved to
Patoka California by now a wife and two toddlers a boy and a girl three boy five they lived in the foot
Hills of the Sierra Nevada mountain range ever where you were in great growth forest of course the
Red Woods get all the glory but take a stroll red clay earth and some of the most gorgeous nature you
Will ever find although the Great Smoky Mountains will give it a run for the money in a later story I will
Tell about them and the gnome mobile and the huge boar black bear that I thought I was going to have
To run to the car pull out my thirty thirty Winchester and start working the lever action to save seventy
Five tourists I put in Jeopardy by getting him out of a deep gully. Well life was good for Steve and his
Family he was living his dream our paths would intersect we stopped at Paso to break the trip in half to
Southern C and Disney land were heard about the fire in Dego it was bad enough that the whole LA
Basin was fogged in for two days the Santa Anna winds finally pushed it out to sea and up the coast I hit
It on the other side of San Louis Obisable in a gorge it was banked in and because of youthful lucky strikes and
Later sleep apnea I couldn’t breathe in the car until I hit the air conditioner well by the time we got
Home to check in at the hotel it was clear home is what Anaheim means in German then there was that
USA Today News paper again I looked and a face was staring at me older and thicker heavey set but I knew the face and then at
The bottom of the picture emotional train wreck a child so giving now as a man had given his life for
Strangers five to six hundred miles south from his home he died trying to save their homes he joined
Many others but these were fresh in my mind the folks who died in the fire storm in Oakland from the
Conflagration that took lives and homes and four lane highways on both sides couldn’t slow it down and
You have as much chance as out running a bullet as you do a fire as twenty five Idaho smoke jumpers
Found out they were racing out of a gorge scrambling to get over the top this natural configuration had
Become a chimney of living flame thirteen died instantly those others rolled over and away on flat
Ground at the top was spared. What could I do I wrapped myself in the only protection I could find he
Died a hero that kept the pain at bay how many times I invoked that statement it worked so well until at
The community center in Patoka where they honored Steve’s sacrifice it was televised Governor Arnold
Schwarzenegger and other state dignitaries his fire house buddies and other fireman from everywhere
Was there and then they panned down to his mother and father his father wasn’t so large anymore and
It was the last time I could use my shield as I looked and watched Pat weeping Uncontrollably over her
Lost son I thought you would like to know of this wonderful person I will close with a thank you in the
Language of the Lakota Sioux as his service had part of it in the native language of his tribe Pilamaya means thank you
Steve you are an inspiration we bow to greatness beyond our understanding

Stupid Detective!
Mixing up the evidence
Loony Detective!
Helping the culprit
with bad conclusions
and your overall confusion
Bad detectiv!
your senses are defective
it shows!
it shows!

At the crime scene
the vanilla ice creme
was fine
and yellow like a dandelion
though ****** had taken place
a stupid detective
a messed up place
could you please just buck up
and find  a trace

Lame Detective!
You are the one to blame
you put Watson to shame
Shameful detective!
respect this
the law
the civilians
and all their fears
Blank minded detective!
Heavey minded detective!
Blinded detective!
falling to sleep
like all the other sheeps

At the crime scene
the vanilla ice creme
was fine
and yellow like a dandelion
though ****** had taken place
a stupid detective
a messed up place
could you please just buck up
and find a trace

(Blackened tissue beside debris of bleachd cocktail
Power pundit in cubicle
A ship in shadow-pieces passing by, unnoticed

smoking water.. now costs getting kickd  out ur xafe
Your blood lies in a high-account and all the stampz areMelting
Crawling in a desert, accusations shave the top off my black land
Did failing the test lead to a power-packed punch in strands
No time for treagedies clogging up the freeway
Twenty watts up the waterfall and your ride is here
Befits a ceremonial decapping
Catch ur vogue latte on the way out
Come aboard by jet and then expect a red carpet, soaked dry from the spoils of erstwehile-smugglers
Let em bleed green notes till the moths all come round the flame
Wait for it… the flame grows hugher… and int it all…………****!

That was easy.
Don’t chuckle out loud when expletives slidie down your back
Like champagne off the shoulder of your ne-xt planet’s ride

Duck in time cos the butters hard and the toast is dry

Four friends over six decades carry grudges heavey enough to pump oil to lakes
And the unexpected happens.. the one they didn’t watch, wwent missing
All eyes on the little one.. no, you didn’t catch them all.

You became immunes to the skills you advert-tarted and sqeueamish set in
you didn’t know casn host violence in a putrid-robe?
One finger pointing out, makes at least three in.. to the pointer
How can one planet swallow so wide a dichotomy in plasticky degrees?
It’s too wide this time to make that jump  – we will ingest what weve been giving all along
And some end up well-funded while others simply dwell..  as frogs in a well.


sun can climb in sometimes, but for half an hour
their fingers are small for the mine, keep small the issue
don’t cry when it rains in expectorata
I think frogs can swim.

when do I ever learn that..  
I am simply a frog in a well
near craxks )*


21feb

My life constitutes of
a dichotic shift as I
drift
between
a state of self-assuredness
and self loathing.

When I am assured
I am sure
that my eyes are a
golden brown,
my smile whitened and straightened
with perfectly painted lips.
My eyelashes curl upward
as I give you my most intriguing smirk,
inducing you into giving me
those copies for free
and saying "Ay girl"
as I cross the street.
My jeans hug my hourglass figure
like a girl from a video,
and the compliments find themselves
going my way.
My brain swells with
knowledge and an almost-eery insight
as I predict your admiration
and find myself compensating as to
not appear
ostentatious.
I hold myself with the highest regard and
refuse to let a man
make me feel inferior,
to judge me by my exterior because
I am superior to that
treatment.
My wit is quick and
you can bet I'll put a
Slick Rick in his
place if he is even fit to
keep up with my pace.

But then again
I look at him and see
him frowning at my
symmetrical, but overly round
face,
thinking that there might
be other ladies in this place
with a smaller frame,
with a flat stomach and
a tame sense of style,
not a fedora or Timberland boots or a beanie,
not someone who cackles when
she laughs
and talks even more loudly and
obnoxiously than she chuckles.
I'm not smooth enough to
keep your attention as
my obsession with Harry Potter accidentally
gets disclosed,
as I feel my skin-diseased cheeks
bleeding through their concealer and bronzer mask.
A law school degree sounds boring and
braggy as I grasp
at straws, at my only backup source of comfort,
as I attempt to woo you with my brain because
you clearly aren't into a size ten.
You glance out of the sides
of your eyes as you buy me a drink,
or you tell me you aren't
ready for a relationship
even though we've been
sleeping together for a year;
"it's just not you, it's me"
is what I finagle
as a girl named Hailey
posts a picture of you with
your arm around her size two
waist and top-heavey Double D's.
I let down all of my walls and
you forget my birthday,
and I stay devastated over you long
enough for you to
forget my name.

I'm two-in-one;
I'm confidently lacking in confidence and
disapprovingly disapprove of
anyone's opinion of me
but my
own.

Consistency is thinning with the sun
Our minds crawl-
Yet  race on overdrive inside our homes and out in the damp streets.
Simple static,
A mental block of conscious
spread by word of mouth from one disaster to the ****** birth of another.
Another bag of bones,
Clanking over our shoulders-
With heavey arms to bare with
Another gust of wind full of ashes and crowds all dressed in black with their throats in knots.
The words inside our mouths burn as they leave
There is a kid with a guitar on the outskirts of it all.
Watching in as the faces drain from the bodies in the streets.

So he began to sing.
He sang about shades of grey
He sang about the spaces in between
And he sang about the heart that’s been thrown among one person’s beliefs to another’s lack of.
He strummed until the sky turned a shade of blue which resembled his mothers eyes on the night he learned what strength and will was.
As the wind hushed,
The crowd began a melancholy motion,
with their backs turned to all that was
Some with new sight and others in disbelieving disgust.
But one thing held constant-
though time had been tampered and irreversibly changed
They all hurt the same
Each mind had been scrambled like eggs

(C) Tiffanie Doro

In my family
If your lungs don't **** you,
Your heart will.

My lungs don't work
To full capacity,
And my breathings heavey.

But my heart is clenched
Within a fist, crushed and twisted,
Only getting every other hit.

My lungs can't breathe,
And my hearts been abused -
Question is which will **** me first?

This is my ode to you
Lover of life
Giver of joy

Your waters cascade from the mighty heights
Your power descends from above

Your like an ocean
constant
Ever on the move
Ever flowing

My song to you
Is my song of you
Your beauty
Your grace
Your smile
Your world the one you have created
That I so long to be apart of
That I will never be apart of

My eyes swell with tears
My lungs clench with grief
Suddenly Its hard to breathe
The weight of an eternity without you
Hangs heavey on my shoulders
Like millstones around my neck
It drags me to the depths
Taking me down
Deeper than I could have ever deemed possible

Will I ever you see you again?

And so I sit on the shores of this vast expanse
This host of water
This wasteland of sea
I sit here and I think of you
I think of the days we spent

The day in the park
The day in the mountains
The day in the hills
The day at the lake

I sit here and I think of all those times
And in a way I feel as if I am robbing eternity of its captive
I am freeing my mind to the wonder that once was mine.

I close my eyes and I think of you
I breathe life into dry bones
Bring back the love I once had.
And this my ode to you my long lost love

Your beauty will always be in my memory
Your smile never forgotten
Ode to you my long lost love
This is the song I sing for you.

i have these feelings when every one around you is trying to hard. but how can you say thank you when you just want to cry your eyes out. how do you say thank your when its to lat and your tears lready start to fall. that heavey hollow feeling deep inside just makes you cry more&more.; how do u even know what to say? people do things out of kindness. but how do feel when you  just are vary hop full and charresing what you have recived.but if you cry its not bad but it shows what i kind hearted you are.

The morning hangs heavey for one
whom ware the crown last night.

almost full moon earlier
lighting the earth
bright soft light
scattering everywhere

so cold that the wooden boards
comprising the deck
crack and snap at each
foot step
merely soxed ones at that
no heavey shoes

waking after several hours
go by
walking out with hot water
in white china cup
boards snap and
their winter song flies out

hating to return to the warmth
of the bed
would rather be out
under the moon
the moon i've missed,
missed so much

the rhythm of the seasons
bears me not in mind
natural changes since
the beginning of time

but wait for me dear moon?

i didn't mean to be away so long,
and now i don't mean to sleep
inside
away from your charm

beautiful moon
beams down,

silly little one
you can't stop the
eternal march
of this imagined time

tears do no good
resigned
to the deep deep
wisdom of this moon

i sit patiently
when i do sit
patiently

under the light,
the subtle rays
of her monthly
delight

a lone star is visible
this last of nocturnal
checks

morning rushes
closer with her
impending light

clouds cover the heavens
it won't be so bright
when the moon and her light
slip away with this waning
night.

it is said
it is predicted
a blizzard on her way
to cast all astray

dear moon
you and i
will sit
and wait

to find out
exactly what form
this storm shall take!

i love you dear moon
my bestest of companions
but for my beloved puppyhead
well....
you two for sure
but, well, then again
there was Pd

we all love you dear moon

you regulate our ******
those of us with ******
and regulate our charms

always
eternally
in harmony
with you
whether we know it

or not!

My mind is broke my heart screams with tears in can't cry out. My regrets follow me pouring nothing but a dreary rain cloud  pouring Frigid rain soaking me down to the bone till I go insain.  I wish I could of told you inside I'm slowly wasting away just like a graveyard filled with rotting rusty  machines.
I wish I could of told my mom is really needed her when I had the darkest days where I felt like I was suffocating.

Every ******* ******* thing I nevery told or should of said enstead  of  holding and hiding my life mistakes.

My every wound seems to fall deeper and my heart feels so heavey with all my battles I problem killed to breath.

My regrets just keeps me from stopping I rather run.
My 25 regret it wish I was able to keep strong but I feel like I rather not necessarily there for  my famly.

Butmy biggest regret is my fear of losing my mom or dad in the night if they pass away threw there sleep I'll let be broken sending me to pack a back and leave my fear is I'm bipolar and I'm scared or losing them. My every word doesn't seem to matter only my creative thoughts do.



I am filled with wounds scares all from my every single regret that is like the darkness or the smoke from cigarettes.


I am broken to the point I'm unfixable.
So I just drag myself and long taking blow by blow making me weaker ad time goes on .
I  know you have to tell your life stories bit shut the **** up if you see or I tell you my life story  you'll problem drown your self in your own tears if you look at me you'll not bear able to but stair so don't tell Meveryone our ******* story  look at my broken mind body tell me if you can fix the years of the he'll that consumed me killing me hashing my voice where I couldn't scream or breath I was traded into ****** silent only that funny side I was torched till my lungs burned with hate

So don't tell my your Bulls **** life stories just look at me and try not to drown your self in your tears just listen and know I'm note strong enough to to be fixed

My biggest regret is I'm scared to lose my mom and dad I don't know if my last Batley ids strong enough to  hold I might just shut down and fall apart

I am broken and unfortunately unfixable

the darkness begains to spread like sickness i have never wanted to see. people turning in to savage animals when the riots begain fire breaks out so dose blood shed. the one peace full small sleepy town has became the place where you cant hide anywhere. the ones who are traped is me ad my life. this madness grows bigger and bigger. swat teams start to come from every direction hellicopters heavey armered vhicles even tanks. what was once a place for peace has broken out in to blood shed with no escape. all you hear is guns  and screaming all around. me and tho oness who have hidden deep in the shadows of the buildings just watch as the anger spreads. who even knowes if any of your parents have even survived. what was once started cant be stop'd by force alone. no matter what shows is only blood pools lining the street. only 2 nights there were no blood shed but just watching threw your hide aways you just see the people who was taken to violence ending something so corrupt that it will only take the ons who follow in the shadows to take down the danger of threat. what was once a simple sleepy place now is complete ruins. theres no place safe to step out in to the light exept for us to follow the plan to fight with no violence but psychological taking down each part slowly. even if it means if e grow anger? but thats how the sickness spreads slowly turning people in to vishious animals. what me and my friends who hid in shadows the image is to grusim ****** dead bodies lay all around .

this sickness spreads when you turn anger in anger corrupts and the darkness begains to take its place in its down fall. th only darkness in me is when i dont know what to do expet turn evil in for revenge


the darkness turned in to and epidemic taing my nerves. i may be a show creature but  i know when darkness corrupys and spreads like a wild fire
such as riots bring out violence!


what was once a small place has been destroyed by a corrupt rummer.


DARKNESS IS THE IGNITION ANGER IS THE BACE AND U JUST HAVE TO LIGHT IT TO SPREAD IN TO CORRUPY BLOOD SHED WHERE NO ONE SURVIVES!!!!!

only the ones who escapt and working to take down the spread to make peace again

As I lay on my bed I feared the blankets would suffocate me. I swallowed hard and the saliva almost choked me. My nostrils burnt as I laboured to breath, the chest like an IUD about to explored in heavey breath. I gasp, opened my mouth, as dry a  bones of chelbi. My hands fell beside me, my eyes pooped out of their socket, blood shot.
Dread fell on me like the morning dew, hard unexpected and thoroughly cold. My ears heard dins, silent sounds of death.
I knew it was back, having taken its last harvest, it roamed around as it looked through its list. A cold sweat broke out a silent grunt heard, a scuffle in a meadow, and a body drop as the grim, collect its latest prize.
Morning was greeted with mourning as a son of the soil, hit down and ate the dust.

Under me the weight pushes upwards
Contesting all emotion inside my eyes
Looking outward I bare and grit
Loosing balance I tumble and spin

Unparalleled by any past trauma
I craft a future I do not own
Conceding to fate I hold my heart
A heavey burden smoldering slow

A constant thread pulling away
Piling up into a tattered mess
Shattered glass broken once again
Swept up and tossed aside

Sitting idle thoughts asunder
Grazing for a smile a feeling missed
Anxious waiting a hard task indulged
Forever knowing nothing at all

A. Emmi
02/15/18

Every day is filled with nothing but empty promises all the hopes and dreams just shattered broken emotions that feel so heavey it leaves a trail hurt but moving on is for the better falling in love is nothing but a dangerous path when you love your partner so much when they dont even love you all they do is manipulate and pull your strings to get everything from you leaving nothing but a trail of destruction love will sink but hope will always float bringing a new day with endless possibilities to take on even if it leaves your heart soul body and mind with no more energy just follow your heart it will lead you to your meaning you are her on the earth for