There was once a flickering flame,
Its rising heat causing no pain.
But a shadow it cast,
telling tales from her past.
Now she runs to escape it in vain.

"I'll make a picture of you" I told her
"Are you a painter?" she asked.
"No, but I can paint you in words" I answered

******* The Wing

She helps selfishly, she gives everything,
even to those who don't give back,
even to those who have nothing left,
even to strangers like me.

She cares about everybody,
even about people that hurt her,
even about people that don't know her,
even starving kids in Africa she loves like closest friends.

She is such a talented writer as well!
Her poems are emails of heart,
such emotions in rhythm and rhymes.
I wonder how she could be so awesome.

She is a God's gift,
most beautiful object in the universe,
she is an angel on earth,
and this is no praise - just stating the facts.

staring down the barrel, increasingly stretching darkness
to a bright light, tye-dye, good vibes
take a deep breath, cause what is said is rarely what you think it means
she says up, higher, but you're trying to go down
to bring her chest to raise higher and lower
she says why, when you're only looking for how
saying hi when you really mean bye
you bring your face to life in goodmorning, hi, hey, hello
bringing my mind to life in goodnight, bye, ok
oh ok, fine, uncertainties aren't your thing
but im the certain, im gettin nervous, no room to move
we're only bound to lose
wanderlust, my heart is
staying home learned the lines of yoda your mind knows
is where you find your greatest joy
everything is likely far from what it seems
similarities don't bind seams
new ideas bind two different fabrics
its magic
like the happiest place on earth, we're all searching
look up at the billboards sliding past your window
taunting you that happiness is just out of reach
but if you'd close your eyes and just imagine open skies
you might have less questions that stay at whys

I didn't know you'd never fall like you did
feet in the air, palms on the ground
I didn't know you'd never make me feel like a kid
but I wanted to so I ran round and round
up and down, searching for the love I hope you kept hid
between dancing smiles and raining frowns
but it was fourteen plus two and two and two
my will was yet ready to trek to depths of the unending blue
when you pushed, i couldn't believe it to be true
leaving me to drown in the nonexistent idea of me and you

but we snap, flip back, run around the race track
to the same starting point, white flags waving surrender
to contagious conversationalist talking of extraneous happiness
tracing the blank novels of love tales never written

you've always been the captain of this ship
swearing you're too afraid to wreck it
but you sail us into the lands never sailed by experience
just to see the life unseen, im serious
and I have a feeling
we're aimless travelers
I have a feeling
we're destined passengers
I have a feeling
we'd never have a feeling
because we're terrified
of having a feeling
of dissapointments
of having a feeling
of failure
of having a feeling
that feelings could take us over  


but we snap, flip back, run around the race track
to the same starting point, white flags waving surrender
to contagious conversationalist talking of extraneous happiness
tracing the blank novels of love tales never written

we could take the long way home
drive a little longer
just don't pull over, we can just roam
pass the passing seasons,
we'll just wander
through songs for all the wrong reasons
between the voices and instruments we can rest
just don't pull over, we have no reason
time is the test, the test is the exit exam
just don't pull over, cause im going to scram
running in the opposite direction
to a world where you can never read my ****** expressions
of pure affection


but we snap, flip back, run around the race track
to the same starting point, white flags waving surrender
to contagious conversationalist talking of extraneous happiness
tracing the blank novels of love tales never written

but it was time, i escaped the coy persuasion
it was mathematics, the perfect equation
of fourteen plus two plus a few and I lost count
and replaced it with a sensation
of unrequited friendship, our own sermon on the mount
a love stronger than I aimed when one met six
of trust bound tighter than welded steel
cause now we just laugh, skip past the oceans filled by hurt feelings
walking on the beach, looking at the beautiful view
of what was once me and you

but we snap, flip back, run around the race track
to the same starting point, white flags waving surrender
to contagious conversationalist talking of extraneous happiness
tracing the blank novels of love tales never written

I always thought I was so careful
trying to make sure that I left your heart whole
and no matter how many times I left a bread trail
I'd turn around to retrace my steps and fall short
and no matter how careful, I'd still be lost

I'd try to sort it out, work it out
and it'll all add up to screams and shouts
just hoping that someone would hear to let us out
now that we've come to see the light
let's all just be alright

I swear I never meant for it to happen like this
a broken record stuck on the part of the song that got popular
like this rut that we fell into that became so well known
and all the songs that finish out the album are stuck behind a wall too tall
I hated to tell you that I had finally fell victim to all the scratches we were trying to fix

love by any other name will feel as sweet
as the first time we meet
when we were dancing with happiness and we called it bliss
as the first time we touched
when we were so tangled in lust and we called it passion

but love by any other name is hiding behind being coy
and im so ******* ready to come out and just be blunt
to laugh and not worry
about what you might really mean
because how am I suppose to know what you mean
when you never say what you mean
and yes im sarcastic
and yes you're full of wit
and **** yes, that was part of it when I fell to be part of your focus
but passive and sarcastic are not friends
they don't even rhyme or sit nicely side by side

love will eventually sit by the graveside of its ambiguous mistress
because mistrust caused her to be ran over
and a misstep knocked her off the building
to fall to a million pieces and shatter
the mistress in known so well the world nicknamed her a broken heart
and love forever falls victim to her lifeless grave

I woke up this morning with a skip in my step
an inconsistent beat vibrating my feet
coercing out the words stuck in my teeth.
I got so excited in between my coffee and log in screens
that my thoughts finally remembered their routine
of unorganized and coyly placed memories
writers block is kind of a funny thing
because its not just a wall you're standing at
while looking up and shouting for the next greatest epiphany
its more like every thought you have crashing against a metaphorical gate
and pressing you into one place until your hope and understanding starts to deflate
you see, its more like a dam
no wait, like a traffic jam
because the color red telling you to stop strobes ahead of your thoughts
and frustrations build higher and higher the longer you sit there.
concentration is essential because you don't want to skid into crashing
but instead try to look forward to floating when the tension lays low
because when your writers block lets go
and your thoughts find ease in a melodious flow
you forget about the fire to your ego
that blocked what you thought you might know

Do you know what love is?
the sound of an 'o' resonating into a twisted lock
it's suppose to be and infinite explosion
like a contradiction, a permanent contraction
of two lost souls who before stray and sway like a rope swing
that'll get taken advantage of flung behind the childlike whims
of a free falling jump that falls to the crackling of the ground beneath two feet
a mirror image of the security snapping slowly into the marrying of a morpheme and it's base
its the careful intertwining of letters that made me think of heartbreak
to place it a little less coyly
how easily we could marry in and security to bring the anti of the original meaning
and how less seamlessly we part from testing the waters
even if you did like swimming, getting out is always freezing
like the lack of warmth from a hug that's been gone too long
and I wonder why strength of a person is placed in something so temperamental
something that relies on maintaining a temper  that is not your own
it can drive you mental, an anger rid insanity
and how the strength of someone is supposed to slightly weaken
when the hands of strength practice holding too many other grips
but as easily as marrying one grip to mean less by merely adding 's'
i'd ask to take to test that maybe we're practicing holding onto you
a little more than less so that when our will gets a bit restless, you can stand straight and tall
instead of crumpled in a ball after the terrible fall
i cannot reconcile heartbreak and negativity
because I think that heartbreak and love are happily married
outside of the social constraints of a contract
and inside of unexplainable commotion of emotion
I know I ask a lot of questions
and I know I have a lot of theories
but what never made sense to me was how to love endlessly
like just in spite of me my senses would flee leaving me chasing
and leaving someone witnessing my fury of confusion
but perhaps it never made sense to me because I arranged a divorce between heartbreak and love
before I knew who either of them were

You told me to write about
what scares me.

At first I thought, well, everything scares me.
That sense of endless possibilities is what caused my writers block
in the first place.

Sorry.

Further down the road, my depressive nihilism kicked in.
Nothing can scare me,
and nothing really matters.
It's the illusion of life
pointing its big, daunting finger
and laughing.

When I finally hit both ends of this,
felt everything and nothing,
it hurt somewhat, yes, but-
I began to write.

Now my words reflect
everything I feel and don't feel,
everything that is and isn't.
Now, I take everything that passes through me
and make it into something else,
something completely new.

In this moment,
I have complete control over my little universe.
There is a world out here,
more vibrant than I ever imagined.

So thanks for that.



-e.r.n.