I tried to control the chaotic ocean
By knowing the mind behind the waves
I thought the sea could reside within my grasp
If only I knew how the waters behaved

Water resembles so much of life
And I could not help but drown in it
The tides move faster than I can swim
More than I am willing to commit

I need space and time to breathe
And like life, the waters won't wait
Constantly, flowing like a river
Life pulls me along by my fate

To survive, you have to swim
Trying anything to keep afloat
Life won't stop because you do
It will grab you by the throat

Then throw you into its depths
Where you can finally rest
Feel the stillness you never had
After all, you had given your best

But before you touch the bottom
Where heaven's light cannot reach
Remember all of your past struggles
And ask, what was it trying to teach?

Resting and quitting are not the same
You're only finished in the moment
Pull yourself back and take a break
Then simply readjust your focus

The only thing you can control
In this chaotic span of life
Is yourself alone in its entirety
Cater yourself to what you strive

I feel out of focus
A lost shadow
Trying to find the sun
And the warmth it once had
With storm clouds passing
I feel at home with myself
Solitude in the darkness
A soundless voice
Lost in the wind
Carried away to somewhere unknown
Waves crash above me
It’s been too long since I came up for air
Maybe I will be able to swim to the sun
As it reaches the horizon
Or will I be too slow
And it will fade into the sea

flickered souls
who mourn at night
accumulate to swallow
light

shredded strings
heal
battered snare
cures
these months
weren’t easy,
tonight is

transcend.
watch sorrow
bend
and morph into
pocket-sized
rivers of
vibrancy

we are
a sacred congregation
in blasphemous glory
all good things
come in
thousands

forget the man
the lies
and cry
i always wanna die
(sometimes)

long for nothing
crave it all
is this how it feels?
to be young?