The new year should bring
New inspirations but I am
Feeling quite lost.

Spinning on delicate in a
never ending cycle of my
Washing machine.

Repetition at its finest.
New would be nice I reckon.

I watched you in the sky,
a sparkle of sublime
While neurons danced
In my head

There one day,
And gone the next.

Now I'm ashamed I do not
Think of you often.
Ashamed.

It’s hard to have faith
In things we can’t see.
There’s not enough evidence
To make me believe.

I’ve fought this battle
For a lifetime too long.
I’ve read the book.
I’ve sang his song.

Caught in a loop
I can seem to escape.
Who will pull me out
Before it’s too late?

He sits like he owns the place,
Walks like he’s already won the race.
Professional,
Yet casually.

Grey coat draped over his sure shoulders,
Moves quick and slick unlike boulders.
Swift,
Yet casually.

The black bag sits alone,
As he waits observing on his phone.
Tense,
Yet casually.

He catches a glimpse and chuckles a laugh.
I turn away his face only half.
Knowing,
Yet casually.

He knows something that I don’t.
Pay close attention but I know that you won’t.
Casual
Yet, undetected.

Infinite depths of unknowns
We can’t see,
Do you take the chance?
What’ll it be?

The current pulls you into
An open mind,
Watering eyes from
The waves of brine.

Deep down under,
It reveals the truth.
And rips it back out with
A tide or two

Can you withstand your
Filling billows?
Or must you come up
To your comfortable pillows?

Precious moments to enjoy,
Before all will take a turn.
Where all good in life
Will without notice crash and burn.

Songs that hurt the heart,
And bring tears to your eyes,
Make you wish you had
One last chance to say goodbye.

Painful memories sparking,
Where they don't belong.
I wish I never said that
You weren't my mom.