As young children,
we most desired toys.
How precious they were,
on every occasion that gave.

We cherished our toys,
for the joy they brought.
Showing them off to others,
so proud of what we had.

But, eventually...
we grew tired of them.
Sometimes quickly,
they became worn and old.

Our interest elsewhere..
all the new toys out there.
Nobody wants used toys,
they're no good anymore.

It has to be shiny and better,
that's much more exciting.
So we discard our old toys,
after we've played them out.

She is obsessed with toys,
and I am her doll...
but now I am old and worn,
and playtime is over.

The girl hums happily, stitching the ragdoll back together.
Spools and needles lay around her, ready as ever.

Every morning she threads a needle and stuffs back the cotton.
Smiling to herself whilst looping the pretty buttons.

Each night is the same as the young girl sleeps.
The ragdoll awakens and from the bed she leaps.

She tears at her stitching and yanks out the cotton.
Pulls her limbs away and prays to lay there forgotten.

But the girl never forgets and at every dawn,
gathers the doll up with a smile and a yawn.

''Oh ragdoll, every night you do the same thing.
Tear yourself up limb from limb.

You don't think you're special or worthy or loved.
At the bottom of every pile of dolls, you've been shoved.

But I will keep stitching you back up until you see,
just how much you really mean to me.'

‪your eyes remind me‬
of a toy i used to play
i don't miss it
but i remember it

deep by the blue ocean
covered with the sand
sitting with the rest
of the lost treasures

it seems as if yesterday
was the golden hour
of my time on earth
for you were there

as i try to memorize
the maps on your back
the concave of your mouth
the painting of your body

l‪eave me with the statue‬
‪the resemblance of you‬
‪for my heart feels safer‬
‪when i'm with you‬

‪the head might be mad‬
‪with your hand i must‬
‪fill the different cracks‬
‪with your everlasting love‬

-j.a.t.f (08.13.17)

no suzie, you can't sit next to Thumper.
you're my dolly. You sit where I want you to.

look at those fluffy ears
I don't trust 'em suzie.
he's a creep

Thumper stop looking at her like that.

Thumper, let me sing you a song
so you understand.

This is my dolly
You can't have it
This is my dolly
And *******

this is my dolly
You can't have it
This is my dolly and
*******

this is my dolly
you can't have it
this is my dolly and
*******.

*Stomp stomp stomp *
"What are you singing?"

Nothing Daddy!

"If that is what Nothing sounds like.
You will sing for the rest of your life loudly,
Do you understand me?"

yes daddy.

"I don't wanna hear nothin' ever again.
where did you learn that song?"

Mommy sang it
last night
turned the shower on
she thinks I can't hear
if the waters running
it doesn't work though,
the way her voice cracks
when she sings
I can tell shes crying.

"Oh...
princess...

you misheard...

last night,
mommy sang:

This is my body
You can't have it
This is my body and

Well that last line...

...that wasn't singing

Daddy just desereved that.

You know, it's funny.

you and I...

...we got the same word wrong."

Home is no longer home
if safe isn't what it is.
A child deserves nothing
but happiness.
Trading legos for bombs
and sticks for knives.

I'm only good in doses the closest you'll ever get to all of me is in the trees when runnin free from dreams of animosity and childhood fears

I wear thin
my impact only comes (in)
if I keep the light dim
If i let it simmer and shout then there is no doubt you'll see all of me and my childhood dreams
My needs that seethe on you
Are a kid and his toy wrench
Turning every loose *****