Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
MisfitOfSociety Aug 2019
There it is again,
That old sting.
No drugs, no needles,
Something else going in.

Creeping up on me,
Like lichen up a tree.
Spreading like frost,
Over a bedroom window.
The pain comes fast,
And the death comes slow.

I feel no pulse until,
There is someone else’s blood flowing through.
I wish to deceive you,
I wish to devour you.
I only want you,
To see how long I can bleed you.
I wait until you let me in,
Then I take everything.
I will then abandon you,
Leaving you with nothing.

We’re all dying from an internal fire.
We all feed on one another.
Carnivorously, I consume others to stay alive.
Life feeds on life, this is how we survive.

I stared too far into the abyss,
I dived too deep into it’s depths.
I lost myself to what I found inside,
And it made its home in my mind.

Drop down a ******,
For me to climb into.
Open up my old womb,
And breathe life into the new.

I perish your human sacrifice,
Hoping to relinquish me of this carnivore.
Is it enough to suffice!?
I want to be separate from this animal.
This is how I used to be as a person. Damaging to both myself and others around me. Don’t be stuck in this way of thinking, cleanse yourself and better yourself.
Pluto Jul 2019
My Self love

will be the best love...

...but your love

was the worst drug
For a brief moment in time I fell in lust
But tried to convince myself I'm in love
We frolicked in our absence and presence
of pain and pleasure
I felt the current of our destination drifting us to the middle of the ocean
Where finally only the one who wishes to swim out of the drift
Would need all the strength to swim back to shore

Learn to know the love you need and want
No matter the unintentional desire
Or self destruction will become your best and only construction
William de klerk Jul 2019
With white knuckles wrapped round a wheel
, while I start to steer in a senseless stupor
, so I slowly start  to sink into my subconscious mind.

There I find I'm So sick of silence, that
In a demented dance with my own demons
I ask them why I won't let go of what once was.

"You drink the poison with a passion
, blurring the lines of punishment and pain
So only self hate can remain"

So secretly I shun what I wish to say so
the vestiges of  my valour can rot away in vain,
Like the living corpse that's left with
long lasting lashes as battle scars
I bare as a badge for the broken.

So in fear I flee the tormenting truth
That I now have to hear
As soon it is clear
My own web of lies led me down a road
of Slow and Selfish Demise.
This is the voice of regret acting in ones head when a person is blinded by all that makes them flawed and imperfect, instead of focusing on the good. This is insecurities personified as demented voices that demand you punish yourself.
wren Jul 2019
.
i want to start believing that i am mine
i want to own every bit of myself
all of the parts i deemed ugly,
ungraceful,
meant to please others,
i want to wrap them all
in the softest cotton
and give them a new home,
one i can live in too
avoiding mirrors is getting really old
Zander May 2019
We were all broken-
but that was nothing new.
Nevertheless,
we continued to fight.
All of us had different mechanisms.

Mines was the worst.

I tried to swallow my pain
and somehow I always ended up choking.
Or vomiting up all the "I'm fine" and "I'm just tired" excuses...
but they kept me whole.
They kept me in charge of myself.

They also kept me broken.

But that was nothing new...
for I've always been that way.
Breanna W May 2019
We are not afraid of the mirror,
We are afraid of the monster it shows.
We are afraid of porcelain skin
stained red,
afraid of never finding the bone,
afraid of never finding the very
core essence of our control.
I am afraid of being too much,
of not being enough,
of this skinny love
for a non-skinny reflection,
afraid of failing
if I am never able to see
my porcelain bones
imprinted on porcelain skin,
my very core
protruding from within.

I am my own control.
and one day,
I shall see it in the mirror,
even if I have to fall into it
and become the monster within.
This is super negative, but it's what I'm feeling right now so I put it up anyways.
I feel like I’m at the rock bottom of my life, feeling so worthless and all i do is blaming myself. I feel like I’m insane to hold the pang in my chest, the pressure of this world madness. Drowning in the deep of miserably and despair. Everything seems not in the line, so overwhelmed , and the hatred towards me has been growth. I don’t even know who i am, or where i am.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
- it terrifies me, that i'm getting lost and neither can save me.
This is me now, during mental break down.
Next page