you know ill put back the peace's together
just to get a glimpse  of what went wrong
Yeah I can see that now your with her
but cant you hear their playing our song
it goes like this
a melody
a good night kiss
you've got a part of me
and no matter weir you go
no matter how far your life takes you
Ill remember this just this moment
nothing more
I know ill see you off and on just running about
And to think that she brought back your smile
Is all that I really care about
so don't you worry
don't give this a second thought
its all rite
I can lurn to move on
just remember me as long as you can
I hope your happy
as you hold her hand

I run from love
in hopes that
it will chase me.

What's the                                   point of
             running forward                         these days if I'm
         only going to run back               wards the next days
       Away from him. He was     a  tantalizing mystery. Now
       I just see his violence.           How very unlike we are. I
          just want to withdraw      myself  from  him for fear
              his ways will seep in      to mine. But I already
                 know what's happen     ing. They already
                     are. Rest in peace,   pieces of me. I'm
                        already losing    myself. Piece by
                            piece the beautiful original m
                               e disappears with no **
                                       pe of returning.
                                           Ever again.
                                                Love,
    ­                                              -S

There are always warning signs,
If you could only see one.
If you do see it in time
Don’t ignore it, just run.
Forgetting what lies behind
You might just get out before it comes.

What if you're not ready?
What if you don't want to be set?
But you're supposed to be,
So reluctantly you do it anyway

But why?

If it's not for you, then it's for them.
Except, it's not

Don't you get tired?
Don't you just want to leave?
Not because of anything they did
The hurtful things they said,
You're stronger than that

Yet you still want to leave

The worst feeling is you can't figure it out, why you want to go
When everything in your life seems
to be going perfectly

But you're still not happy,
And it's not your fault

So why do I run, you ask?
I seek perfection and nothing
at the same time
I just run because that's what I know

I don't think I'm scared of anything
And it's not because I don't love you
I run away for me
Me and only me

I don't know if I'll ever stop
I imagine it would be nice
To let people back into my life again
But I'm not ready for that yet

You running along beside me
does not bring me comfort
Rather, it's the exact opposite
I am the most okay with myself
when I am unsure what is ahead

Running, running, still running
Everything I am, was, depended on,
knew, loved, hoped for, dreamed
All fading fast behind me

And yet I keep running,
All because I'm not ready,
nor do I want to ever be set,

I just wish to forget it all
and you with it

I am a product of my parents:
a combination of hypersensitivity and anti-depressants.
I can see my mother
in the way I flinch
when my the bus heaves
taking me to my next appointment.
My parents did not teach me to be inquisitive
but after running
from one doctor to the next
I needed to know
can medication really save a soul?

running your hardest
still doesnt mean
you wont slip and fall

Fear.

Has picked up my trail
Is looking to find me.

Fear.*

He's right on my tail
He's coming to bind me.

I run through the night
I'm looking behind me.
With no one in sight
I'm running to find me.

Where would I go?
How would I get there?
Will I ever come back?
Would anyone care?

I'm outrunning fear
Running to find me
Who will come near
And help me come find me.

Out of nowhere it strikes me
I fall to the ground
Out of nowhere it fights me 
From pain do I drown

Away from the pain
I go and I swim
But what will I gain 
If I actually win.

I'm running away 
But there's something I lack
I know I can't stay
But do I have to go back?

8/3/13

Striding against gust,
On the verge of victory
Finish line in sight!

I was built on unstable ground
Shifting sands as I ran towards the ocean
Arms reaching towards the vast and wavering wild
Challenging the waves
Give it all you’ve got you cannot knock me down
I learned to run when I was six years old
My hair manipulated into fussy braids that swung in front of my face
As I paced back and forth in front of the door
with a suitcase full of books
And waited for a taxi that would never come
I was built on burning asphalt and swing sets in sweltering summers
Escaping through eighteen different doors
Only to ride my bike in circles
And climb back under barbed wire fences
After wandering in cow fields and a home with a molding mattress
Where I was told people had *** before I knew what *** was
Returning to four walls to wash off the mud and blood
in glistening tubs and hope
That my mother would ask me where I had been
The neighborhood boys would play football in the eye of a hurricane
While I watched through cracked blinds
It only every rained on one side of the street
But the chalk on our sidewalks always washed away
No matter how many pictures of white picket fences
we etched into the concrete
I was built on not yet not finished not good enough this is not the one
this is temporary
Forests and muddy creeks became guarded iron gates
And I hid behind the pool bar to ash cigarettes
Into a Blue Moon
New marble countertops could not cover up the stench of desperation
And the echoes of gleaming empty halls
The sound of a ticking clock and pounding feet
My parents clinging to sand as it trickled through their grasping fingers
And I build castles with the remains