Someone asked me why I chose a job that ends late at night
And all I could say was,
It's alright.
It's not like i could sleep early lately.
So i don't mind working late at night.

What i did not mention was that
I was too busy crying every night before I head to bed
The reason why sleeping is so hard
I wouldnt want them to know
That the reason I was lacking sleep
Was because of a guy
Of a memory
Not because of work

i've been watching the clock tick
for who knows how long
why do i feel so weak
like everything here is wrong
this feeling of unease
just won't let me be
it won't let me fall asleep
it's getting hard to see
but still i'm wide awake
wondering how long it'll take
to clear my head of these thoughts
until i can untie my mental knot
so while i stare at this frozen clock
my way to rest will remain blocked

The noise of silence comes for the weary,
A lullaby for the restless soul.
Some say sleep is for the wicked,
But wicked is sleep for it often escapes us all.

I dream to sink into darkness that warms me,
Cold is the light of the windows of the earth.
To find comfort in the void that envelopes me,
the lightness of being, rid of the heaviness of the world.

But the day will break before my peace,
And a piece breaks within my mind.
While the pandemonium of life slowly creeps back in,
And alas, sleep has gracefully made its escape again.


Written by s i r and r m b

i am
cold toes and ripped jeans,
scalding tea and fake smiles,
too dangerous to love.

i am
worse than you think,
faded scars on hips and wrists,
ragged combat boots held together by duct tape.

i am
coffee breath in the morning,
chattering teeth in the afternoon,
a headache in the evening.

i am
in love with being in love,
too afraid to live properly,
draped in the color black.

i am
more than I can handle,
shining brighter than I thought,
waiting for the world to end.

i am
twisted, broken, and desperate,
shattered glass on a tile floor,
blood stains on old sheets.

i am
an art form gone awry,
burnt and discarded matches,
broken hearted and hopeful.


i am
glassy and bloodshot eyes,
shaking hands,
***** coffee mugs sitting in the sink.

i am
a skipping CD,
a restless night’s sleep,
shadows under eyes that look more like bruises.

i am
wholly and entirely me,
wrapped in flannel and denim and crystals,
something no one else can replicate.

This I feel in every string of being
Turbulence of the mind.
The peace hurt from whence it came,
And so quickly left the scene.

Nigh the stringent rules of a mind in chaos,
A rest n'er goes ungreeted.

As the missiles of a summer storm,
Rain upon the hopeful sound,
Dare'd I reach for the sky,
And was hastily struck down.

A vacant wood,
Reverberates the anxiety,
As the drumbeats in our hearts terrorize,
The thoughts we thought we could.

Lustful for the peace of endless time,
And finally release a smile sincere,
Shush our emblazoned thoughts,
And set free our restless minds.

What do you do with yourself
When nothing is wrong,
But it feels like everything is?
The motions of daily life
Leave you numb and cold

You want to justify the feeling
Confirmation that the world is wrong
But you don't know what to believe
Your mind has lied to you before
So you sit in frantic silence
Restless and crazy

You know you should be worried
About something out there
But you don't know what it is
So you just worry about it all
Driving yourself mad

Once the panic in your flesh subsides,
Your mind continues on
Chasing highs of stimulation
Heart pounding and blood pumping
Desperately pleading its case

And all of this
The wars within
And beyond your skin
Leave you here
Restless and crazy