Dreams of dawn keep waking me,
I'm going on another spree,
of taking a path that's not worn down,
I've been faking the math and turning it around.

I don't want to go, but I know, that life is so.
I don't want to go, with the flow, they move too slow.

Dreams of dawn keep waking me,
with a yawn and shaking constantly.
Feeling ill and dreading the sun,
so I'll take a pill but it's not the only one.

I don't want to go, but I know, life is so.
I don't want to go, the wind's can blow, I'll hide from the snow.
I don't want to go, but I know, life is so.
I don't want go, I'm feeling low, I'm no swan but a crow.

Dreams of dawn are waking me,
I'll be a pawn along with society.
Too much work for too little of pay,
my knees will **** but my feet will stay.

I don't want to go, but I know, life is so.
I don't want to go, I'll never grow, if this world's a foe.
I don't want to go, but I know, life is so.
I don't want to go, march in a row, and feel the tow.
I don't want to go, but I know, life is so.
I don't want to go, don't make me, no, there won't be a show.

I hate  you
I love you
Maybe it’s not good enough to be true.
I know enough
With the waters this rough.
I’m just not happy like I used to
Mad and angry resentful and sappy.
I’m tired of caring, pouring my heart,
It’s bleeding.
The ****** of blood from my wrists
Drip down my arm
And kids ?
The moral of the story is not to be told
But experienced and forever alone.

Life Without Resentment

Nearly everyone has stored
among hardbacks and paperbacks
or dusty mental drawers
resentments, gathered incidentally
unintentionally or
by rubbing shoulders
with ingrates and other
irritating souls

Meeting her, she exudes
an excitement for what is said
while displaying an openness
a self-reliance
that disallows any acrimony
indignation or animosity

No bitterness is harbored
nor rancor secreted
among the ruins
of her disappointments

Not long-suffering
the past is forgiven and forgotten

Not apprehensive or perturbed
she treads in this moment
with the power of living in the present
no longer feeling victimized
She lives refreshed, restored
without resentment

What do you think
is God's big plan
When you have a face of a woman,
But the heart of a man?

When your trapped in the female check box
And your parts don't match your head
But society stares at you like a hawk
Because society wants you dead

I looked up to you like a baby calf
Looking up to its oh so loving mother
Did you do this for a laugh?
Was this pain meant for another?

Because I've been told by your people, oh great father
That you will not love me the way you made me,
That we will never see each other

Should i stay
In the body that you gave me?
Or should i learn to let it go?
To let things be?

But staying is hell
And leaving is heaven
So much that I'm willing to go to hell
That I'm willing to never have a taste of heaven

Why god did you make me look this way
Then make my heart someone different

Did you do it to test me?
To show me that I'm strong?
Or did you make a mistake?
Did you get my formula wrong?

I cant let this go,
Why cant you see,
I have to let my colors flow,
I cant let things be,

I'm sorry god
But please try to see,
I was never that girl
You wanted me to be

Lying under the acorn tree
We indulged each other's company
Hours of playing catch and kiss
Imagining years of happiness
Eternal enchantment, you and me

When you left, the other day
Was it love that made me claim
You never would be happy again?
What laws of nature must we obey?
Do lizards and butterflies really play?