1,000 yrs ago is nothing in the
  tower of when. Standing on
a rock 2 million years past.

The future is present and
   the present is last.

My body was there, but not the soul within,
I felt something strange, a battle to begin.
Unfamiliar feelings, emotions untamed,
Lost in a world where I couldn't be named.


I moved and spoke, but the words felt astray,
As if I were dancing to a tune I couldn't play.
My body, a vessel, devoid of the core,
A silent, empty vessel, craving something more.


In the silence of that moment, I yearned to be whole,
To reunite with my soul, to fill the gaping hole.
For I knew in that instance, what was truly amiss,
My body was present, but my soul was in abyss.

Before the world
Wakes from its slumber,

The luminance
Of the night casts
Down.

Now it's five a.m. and
I'm restless, wanting
Something more,

Lost again,
Just like before.

Lonely, heartbroken,
I don't want to feel
Anymore.

In the darkest
Hour, I lie awake.

Memories of you
And I, and I just
Want to cry out.

Read between the
Lines,

Everything's not fine.

The world's not in
Black and white,

But the color
Has run out, and I'm
Cast out.

So I lie here awake,
Remembering the
Better days when

You were mine.

Remember that one,
autumn when you
thought you lost
it all?

Your heart was
in the worst,
state it has
ever been

A drug-filled
binge that
took you for
a never-ending

Ride.

You broke down,
and then your
heart broke in
two.

Because you saw
it was
the end of me
and you.

You clutched
the photos
close to your chest

Because you
couldn’t hang on
to what has been.

You felt lost inside,
and you couldn’t
control the downward
spiral

You trapped
yourself in.

Now one year
after and you’ve
let go of false
hopes and illusions.

Scared and
afraid to make
changes and leap

Into the arms of
another soul
again.

Remember that one,
October when you

Thought you lost
it all?

You haven’t hit rock bottom
and I know it feels
like you lost it all.

Keep your head up, kid.

Stand tall.

Be careful
of looking forward
to something
yet to happen
tomorrow,
later -
that you lose sight
of everything
happening
today,
now.

i couldn’t remember your middle
name if you asked me to.
lee or mary?
i’m an island
and you’re nebraska,
surrounded by a
million proud people
positive in a combined effort.
i’m still the same girl who said we would move in together when we were older, but we were twelve and so naïve to the
idea of broken relationships.
the middle of june stings me each year
when the calendar tells me
it was the time you were born
and i can’t write you a note
because i’m too afraid to invest too
much of myself in a girl i don’t even
recognize anymore.
right in the pupils,
you didn’t smile.
i’ll be quiet for the sake of you
i’ll go under your radar
till you forget my meaning
to you.
this love is so selfish or
what would i even call it?
i don’t even think about
you or your prairies
just the childhood memories
shot in the heart of me
by one big arrow
it says “don’t let anyone
be your best friend
because it will end.”
i should have taken that advice
and ran for my unworthy life.

If the past is only an idea,
And the future does not exist;
Then we have the present,
Though immearsureable,
It's what we have,
And it travels faster
Than the speed of light.
Grab it.
Now.